I'm gonna hide my balloon.

我要來藏氣球了

I got the perfect spot already.

我已經知道完美藏匿點了

Ain't nobody gonna find it here.

絕對沒人會找到的地方

Goddammit...

該死

Come on!

拜託喔

Gah!

嘎啊啊

Fucking bitch...

天殺的王八蛋……

Get on! Get-

滾上去!!!上……

God!

天啊啊

Heh, Heh, Heh, Heh.

去吧

Let's go!

幹——

Fuuuuck...

根本跳不過去

-jump is impossible!

不可能成功，不可能成功

It- It-

拜託，瑪利歐

It can't be done! It can't be done!

想想我怎麼說的

Come on, Mario.

你不成功我就宰了你

Think back to what I told you.

好，來吧，來吧，來吧

If you don't make this, I'm gonna kill you.

來吧，耶

Okay, come on, come on, come on.

欸

Come on!

欸

Yeah!

哦哦哦

Eh!

碰~~

Ta- Ooh!

好，要來了

Boo!

要來了

Okay, here we go!

剛剛是簡單的部分

Here we go!

現在要來做刁鑽的部分了

That was the easy part.

好，必須上去……

Now it's time for the tricky part.

然後在準確時間跳開所以帽子可以回來

Okay, just gotta get up here...

欸

Now, just gotta jump off at the exact right time

啊

so the hat comes to him.

哈?

Eh!

哈?

Ah!

呼

Huh?

好耶

Huh?

嘿嘿

Hoo!

嘿嘿嘿

*wheezing*

去找到那個氣球吧，你們這些臭酸畜生

Yes!

呵呵呵

Heh, heh, heh!

好，那傢伙也藏那邊

Yes!

那傢伙也藏那邊，那傢伙也藏那邊

Go ahead and find that balloon, you stinking animals!

那傢伙……沒藏那邊

Heh, heh, heh!

他藏那邊，他藏那邊，他藏那邊……

Okay, that guy hid it there.

哦，這個很簡單

That guy hid it there, that guy hid it there,

看

that guy- He didn't.

哦，啥……你幹了啥?

He did, he did, he did...

他藏在橋下

Oh, this is an easy one!

當我智障嗎?

Look!

我白癡啊?

Oh. What- What did you do?

哦 等等

He hid it under the bridge.

不，哦，他用了程式錯誤穿牆

What am I, stupid?

他用了程式錯誤穿牆

What am I, stupid pills?

你個小王……

Oh. Wait.

沒關係，各位

No, he- Oh, he did a wall glitch.

我會程式錯誤穿牆

He did a wall glitch.

看著然後學著點，小鬼

You fuck-

好喔

It's okay, guys!

用摩托車會比較簡單

I know how to do the wall glitch.

我要用摩托……

Watch and learn, boy!

只要卡到對的角度……

Okay...

欸~~~

It's easier to do it with the motorcycle.

進去啦

I'm gonna do the mot-

耶

Just gotta put it at the right angle-

嗚啊啊啊

Aah...

拜託喔喔

Get in there.

呀

Yeah!

窩

Oooooh!!

噗呵呵

Come on!

給我進去你個低能

Yee-

滾進去

Whoa!

不

Heh, heh!

不!!!我都進去牆裡了!!!!

Get in there, fucking thing!

不

Get in there! It's imp-

不要啊啊啊

*GASP*

如果你把氣球放在牆裡，去你的

NO!

直覺告訴我，就在這個區域某處

No! I was in the wall!

(聞聞)

NO!

我好臭

NO HO-HO!

我好像聞到了氣……

If you put a balloon in the wall, fuck you!

在那邊

My heart tells me that it's somewhere in this area...

在那邊

*sniffing*

嘻嘻嘻

I'm stinking.

抓到你了

I think I smell a ballo-

喔，拜託喔

There it is!

這個比較簡單

There it is!

只要知道在哪就好

Heh, heh, heh!

只要跳下來

Gotcha!

靠，等一下

Oh, come on!

呵，不

This is an easier one once you knows where it is, really.

呵嘻嘻

Just gotta jump down...

看，是Chris

Oh, shit! Wait!

他想幹嘛?

Heh, no!

嗚~他把汽球放在那

Heh, heh...

我不知道耶，Chris

Look, it's ChriZz!

那個點根本挑戰不了我這種人

What's he up to now?

看著然後學著點，小鬼們

Ooh! He's putting it over in that spot.

然後……看到了

Eh, I don't know, ChriZz...

啊啊

That spot just isn't a challenge to a guy like me.

Chris

Watch and learn, boys.

你讓我失望了

And there it is.

庫巴?你來玩瑪莉歐幹嘛?

Ahhh.

7秒鐘跑260公尺

ChriZz.

好像很合理，好

You disappoint me!

五

Bowser?! What are you doing playing Mario?

四

7 seconds to go 260 meters.

好

That sounds fair. Okay!

耶

5...

狀況不錯

4...

哦

Okay.

哦，差……

Yeah!

喔，差一點點

We're doing good!

就……

Oh!

他媽怎麼做的?

Oh, just...

他……他一定用了GameShark(作弊卡匣)

Oh, just almost there.

沒其他可能了

If-

他一定有用……

How the fuck?

他怎麼跑那麼遠的?

He- He must used GameShark™

哦窩

There's no other way.

哦哦哦哦哦

He has to be-

青蛙，當然了

How the hell did he make it so far?

當然了，青蛙

Oh.

然後你……哦~

*gasp*

哦，對

OH!

然後你得，嗚~

The frog, of course!

嗚~然後你得上來這

Of course. The frog!

然後要……嗚~好喔

And then you- Ooh!

好~喔，庫巴

And then- Oh, yeah.

你想玩這套?好啊

And then you gotta- Ooh!

然後你得拿……哦嗚

Ooh! And then you gotta come up here

齁齁齁齁

and say... Ooh, okay!

好

Okay, Bowser!

然後你得跳出去

You want to play like that? All right!

我懂了

and then you gotta get the- Ooh!

然後……

Ho, ho, ho, ho!

然後你用GameShark跑完剩下的路

Okay!

他媽的庫巴掛狗

And then you gotta jump off...

來吧寶貝來吧

I get it now!

來~吧，嘻嘻嘻

And then...

這次看起來……

And then you use GameShark™ to get the rest of the way.

來吧，跳過去

Fucking Bowser, cheater!

去你的庫巴幹你媽的

Come on, baby! Come on!

就是這次了

Come on! He, he, he!

來吧

This is looking like- *mumbling*

ㄍRRRR

*Breathing and laughing*

嗯嗯LERRRRR

Come on, make it!

挖啊啊啊啊

Fucking Bowser! Fuck you!

這次感覺很棒

This is the one.

這……哦

Come on!

搞砸了

Grrr!!!

等我拿到這個……

GRRRH!!!

我會寄給庫巴一個憤怒信件

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

裝在信裡

Got a good feeling about this one.

過……

Got a... Oh!

過……

Fucked it up.

哦!!!

When I get this...

齁!!!拿，快拿!!!!

I'm gonna send Bowser an angry letter

嘻嘻嘻嘻

in the mail...

去你的庫巴

Get-

看看你

Get-

你現在看起來超蠢

Ooh!

(花費金幣:4000+) 給我我的450金幣!!

Ho! Get it, get it!

我們接下來要幹嘛?哦

He, he, he, he!

哦，這個是送分題

Fucking Bowser!

每個人都擺那邊

Look at you!

就趕快拿吧

You look so stupid now!

懂他們做甚麼了嗎?

Give me my 450 coins!

這是最沒創意的一個

What should we do next? Oh!

你拿噴射花……

Oh, this one is a freebie.

對

Everybody puts it up there.

然後跳進這個

Let's just get that one.

然後就在杯子頂部

You see what they do?

對

This is the most unoriginal one.

然後……輕輕鬆鬆

You get the flower.

哦，對

Yeah.

有時候會放在杯子裡

And then you just go on this thing

沒什麼創意啊，各位

and it- it's on the top of the cup.

呃

Yep.

啥?

And easy.

在哪?

Oh, yes.

哦齁齁

Sometimes, they put it in the cup.

他

Not very original, guys.

他把我耍著玩

Eh.

這是我最棒的藏匿點了

What?

沒人可能……你看看

Where the hell-

碰

Oh, ho ho!

怎……

He...

沒人找的到這個地方的

He fucked me over!

欸，等等

This is my best hiding spot ever!

看這影片的不准拿，好嗎?

Nobody is ever- Look at that!

哎呀哎呀哎呀

Boom!

真希望不是庫巴

How-

又想來玩這個遊戲

Nobody is ever gonna get that one!

我不同意，各位

Eh, wait!

我會成天追著這個庫巴

Nobody watching the video get that, okay?

然後戳爆他放的每個氣球

Well, well, well!

所以，他會了解到……

If it isn't BOWSER

他 不 可 能

trying to play the game again!

在瑪莉歐裡幹掉我

I don't think so, guys!

永遠!!

I'm just gonna follow this Bowser around all day

永遠不行，庫巴

and pop every single balloon he puts down.

好嗎?

So he knows

除非他用了GameShark，像這個

that he CANNOT

噗嚕嚕嚕嚕咚~~~

beat me in this Mario game.

甭~

Ever!

波

Ever, Bowser!

嗚，庫巴，泥看看泥

Okay?

嗚嗚~~

Unless he uses GameShark, like he did here.

從我臉前滾開，庫巴

*Making the sound of an old engine*

這是很機車的一個

Boung!

這傢伙表示……

Pa!

他表示：「聽好，我要讓你跑一大圈到這個個巷子裡」

Ooh! Bowser, look at you now!

然後

Ooh!!

我不會邀請你參加我的生日派對

Get that shit out of my face, Bowser!

然後，與此同時

This is a fucker one.

我要當個王八蛋

This guy is saying... He's saying

我要當，然後，我要當混蛋

"Look, I'm gonna make you come all the way out to this alley"

然後我要把汽球放在那邊

"and..."

看

"I'm not even gonna invite you to my birthday party".

我們遇到他媽「智者」了，先生女士們

And at the same time,

不，沒關係，他覺得他很厲害

"I'm gonna be a dickhead!"

他覺得他很厲害，但他超爛

"I'm gonna be a- And I'm gonna be a dick"

我他媽是最廢的

"and I'm gonna put the balloon way out here."

「我要把七球訪在那~~」

Look.

我的老天

And we have a fucking wise guy here, ladies and gentlemen.

來吧來吧來吧來吧

No. It's fine! He thinks he's good.

來吧

He thinks he's good but he's... He's shit!

來吧!!!!

I'm the fucking worst ever!

來吧

"I'm gonna put.... put it over here!"

嘔嘔嘔嘔嘔

Oh my god...

來吧!!ㄟ

Come on, come on, come on, come on!

ㄟ

Come on!

啊，幹

Come on!

嘻 嘻

Come on!

布啦啦啦

HOOOOO!!!

來吧啊啊啊

Come on! Eh!

來吧

Eh!

就是……

Ah, fuck!

就是這次，就是這……

Hee, hee, hee...

鼻要……

BBBBBBBBBBB- Aah!

好啦，dickle murf

COME ON!

你想用，你想，你想用GameShark來玩瑪莉歐?

Come on!

GameShark作弊卡帶?很好

This a-

很好，機掰人

This is the one! This is the-

這個嗎，猜怎麼著

*wheezing*

我用了Action Replay(另一種作弊卡匣)

No!

好，小婊子

All right, Dinkleberg!

庫巴?

You wanna use it- You wanna- No, you wanna use fucking GameShark to play Mario?

又是你?

A GameShark? All right!

這次又想幹啥，庫巴?

All right, fuck fuck!

吧

Well, guess what?

啥?

I got Action Replay™.

他怎麼……?

Ya little bitch...

他怎麼上去的?

Bowser?!

哦，你知道他怎麼做的嗎?

You again?!

他跳到計程車上

What are you up to this time, Bowser?

他說「衝浪季節(電影)」

Ah!

然後他上來這裡，後空翻到這東西上

What?

然後他說「吧 並」

How did he...

然後他說「嘿~~」

How did he get it all the way up there?

然後他說「我哦哦哦」

Oh, you know what he did?

「啊啊啊啊」

He jumped off the taxi-

然後他說「庫巴時間」

Yep, he said "Surf's Up!"

然後他後空上來，然後對，沒錯

then he came up here, flipped onto the thing

沒錯

then he said "Bap, Bing!"

然後他，他

then he said "Hey!"

庫巴，你打不贏我，我是你腦裡的蛔蟲

then he said "HOOO!!!"

這他媽三洨?

"Ahhh!!!"

這是目前最難的

then he said "Bowser Time!"

我從來沒上過這裡

and then he flipped onto the... And yeah, yep!

呼——

Yep!

他……

and he- He...

他辦到了

Bowser, you can't beat me. I'm in your mind.

他辦……

What the hell shit is this?

好，現在我知道氣球位置了

This is the hardest thing yet.

那其實才是困難的部分，位……

I've never even been up here before!

(真的過了他媽兩個小時後)

*gasp*

哪種人面禽獸會把氣球放在這上面?

He's a-

這已經沒樂趣了

He did it!

這蠢爆了

He did-

這……去你的瑪莉歐

Ye- Okay, now that I know where the balloon is.

(第257次嘗試) 好!!

That's the tricky part, really. The-

好喔!!!

What kind of inhuman monster puts a balloon up here?

這次就是成功那次

This isn't even fun anymore.

呵，呼——

This is stupid!

三洨啦?

This- Fuck you, Mario!

我成……

Okay!

我成功了

Okay!

呵 哈

This time will be THE TIME.

那團屎真的是遊戲歷史上最蠢的屎了

*gasp*

那個跳躍

What the fuck?

越過那個紫色山

I did-

理論上根本不可能

I did it!

我特此聲明禁止任何人把氣球放在那

Ha, ha!

因為我要把我的氣球放那邊

That shit is the stupidest shit in video game history!

他們他媽絕對拿不到這顆

That jump...