[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE ]

[歡呼及鼓掌]

We decided to celebrate early.

我們決定提早慶祝。

We went out on the street this

這個下午，我們到街上

afternoon, we asked young people

我們問年輕人，

What's the worst thing you ever

什麼是你做過最糟糕的事，

did that your dad doesn't know

而你爸卻不知道的?

about?

We had them answer the question

我們讓他們來回答這個問題。

while their dads were standing

而他們的爸爸就正站在旁邊。

right there.

>> What is the worst thing

>> 什麼是你做過最糟糕的事，

you've done that your dad

而你爸卻不知道的?

doesn't know about?

>> Stole 20 bucks.

>> 偷了 20 元。

>> From where?

>> 從哪?

>> His wallet.

>> 他的錢包。

>> How much money would you say

>> 這些年來你會說總共有多少錢

you've taken from your dad's

是從你爸錢包拿來的?

wallet over the years?

>> Maybe 80 bucks.

>> 或許 80 元。

[ LAUGHTER ]

[笑聲]

>> How do you feel about this?

>> 你覺得怎樣?

>> Um -- You know what?

>> 嗯... 你知道嗎?

Mm.

嗯。

I'm a police officer.

我是一位警察。

Yeah.

對。

[ LAUGHTER ]

[笑聲]

Yeah.

對。

I thought my wife was doing it.

我想我妻子也有這樣做

So -- Yeah.

所以...對。

>> What is the worst thing

>> 什麼是你做過最糟糕的事，

you've done that your dad

而你爸卻不知道的?

doesn't know about?

>> Um -- Remember this semester

>> 嗯... 還記得這個學期

in college whenever I was really

在學校我真的感到很不舒服

sick and I wanted you to come

而我想要你來接我

get me and get a hotel room?

幫我找個旅館嗎?

>> Oh, yeah, for one night.

>> 喔對，住一晚。

>> I was really hung over that

>> 我那時整個早上都在宿醉中

morning.

That's why.

這就是為什麼。

>> You don't drink.

>> 你沒有喝酒吧。

>> Well -- Sorry.

>> 嗯...對不起。

>> You drink?

>> 你喝了?

Who are you drinking with?

和誰喝?

I didn't know you were drinking.

我不知道你那時喝了酒。

>> College.

>> 這就是大學啊。

>> Oh, honey, you're not

>> 喔，甜心，你不應該在那喝醉的

supposed to be drinking down

there.

Mom was saying I needed to drive

他媽說我需要當晚開車到她的學校

down to college for one night,

幫她找間旅館住一晚

get her a hotel room, because

因為

she had diarrhea.

她得到瘧疾。

>> Okay, not diarrhea.

>> 好吧，不是瘧疾。

>> What is the worst thing

>> 什麼是你做過最糟糕的事，

you've done that your dad does

而你爸卻不知道的?

not know about?

>> The worst thing that I've

>> 我做過最糟的事?

done?

When I was in high school, the

當我還是高中生的時候，

first time I did anything

我第一次跟女朋友做刺激的事

provocative with my girlfriend

就在你車子的後座。

was in the back of your car.

>> How provocative are we

>> 到底有多麼刺激?

talking?

>> There was no clothes on.

>> 都沒穿衣服。

>> What's going through your

>> 你現在有什麼想法?

mind right now?

>> Well, he just was in the

>> 那個，他在神學院讀書

seminary, so that shocked me.

所以讓我感到很驚訝。

He just left seminary.

他剛離開神學院。

>> This is before that.

>> 那是在那之前發生的啦。

>> This was my good son.

>> 這是我的好兒子。

It was the other one I was

這是另一個我擔心的問題。

worried about.

>> What have you done that your

>> 什麼是你做過最糟糕的事，

dad doesn't know about this.

而你爸卻不知道的?

>> It's not really bad, it's

>> 這沒有非常糟，

just that on Christmas, well, I

在聖誕節的時候，

know Santa Claus isn't real,

我知道了聖誕老人不是真的存在

Come on, people.

夠了，大家。

>> What?

>> 什麼?

Santa Claus ain't real?

聖誕老人不是真的?

Oh, man.

喔，天啊。

I done messed up now.

我已經搞砸了。

>> What is the worst thing

>> 什麼是你做過最糟糕的事，

you've done that your dad

而你爸卻不知道的?

doesn't know about?

>> What is the worst thing I've

>> 什麼是我做過最糟糕的事?

done?

I had a fake I.D. in high school

高中的時候我有一張假的學生證

that you didn't know about.

你不知道的。

I had to facilitate everybody's

我不得不為每個人的身份提供便利，

I.D.s, I had to ship money to

我必須把錢運到中國去

China --

>> Disrespectful!

>> 太失禮了!