and for the last little while

最近好一陣子

I've been a model.

都在當模特兒

Actually, for 10 years.

其實，已經十年了

And I feel like there's an uncomfortable tension

我覺得，現場突然間

in the room right now

有種不安的緊張感

because I should not have worn this dress. (Laughter)

因為我實在不該穿這一條連身裙。 （笑聲）

So luckily I brought an outfit change.

幸好我帶了一套服裝更換

This is the first outfit change on the TED stage,

這是 TED 台上首次的換裝秀

so you guys are pretty lucky to witness it, I think.

你們能目睹這一刻可真幸運

If some of the women were really horrified when I came out,

但如果我變身後，女士們覺得不堪入目

you don't have to tell me now, but I'll find out later on Twitter.

也不必立即告訴我，我很快就會在推特上看到了

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

I'd also note that I'm quite privileged

我也想說一下，我感到十分榮幸

to be able to transform what you think of me

能夠將你們對我的想法

in a very brief 10 seconds.

在短短的十秒鐘內做出轉變

Not everybody gets to do that.

並非所有人都有這機會

These heels are very uncomfortable,

這些高跟鞋讓人很不舒服

so good thing I wasn't going to wear them.

好在我並不打算繼續穿上

The worst part is putting this sweater over my head,

但糟糕的是我要把這件毛衣從頭套上

because that's when you'll all laugh at me,

因為穿的時候要作笑柄了

so don't do anything while it's over my head.

所以毛衣在我頭上時別笑

All right.

好

So why did I do that?

不過，為何我要這樣做？

That was awkward.

很尷尬吧

Well,

幸好

hopefully not as awkward as that picture.

希望沒有那照片怪

Image is powerful,

形象的威力很大

but also image is superficial.

但形象只是表面的

I just totally transformed what you thought of me in six seconds.

我在六秒鐘就徹底轉變你對我的想法

And in this picture,

而在這照片中

I had actually never had a boyfriend in real life.

我實際上從未有過男朋友

I was totally uncomfortable, and the photographer

拍照時我很不自在

was telling me to arch my back and put my hand

而攝影師卻叫我拱起腰並將手

in that guy's hair.

放到那個男人的頭髮

And of course, barring surgery,

而當然，不談整容手術

or the fake tan that I got two days ago for work,

或是為了工作需要而提早兩天做的日光燈曬膚

there's very little that we can do to transform how we look,

我們幾乎無法去改變外貌

and how we look, though it is superficial and immutable,

而我們的外貌，儘管是表面並一成不變

has a huge impact on our lives.

卻對我們的生活有重大影響

So today, for me, being fearless means being honest.

所以今日，對我而言，無懼就是坦誠

And I am on this stage because I am a model.

而此刻我站在台上，因為我是模特兒

I am on this stage because I am a pretty, white woman,

我在台上，因為我是位美麗的白人女性

and in my industry we call that a sexy girl.

在我行業內稱為「性感女孩」

And I'm going to answer the questions that people always ask me,

而我將要解答人們總是問我的問題

but with an honest twist.

並坦誠相待

So the first question is, how do you become a model?

第一個問題是，妳是怎麼成為模特兒的？

And I always just say, "Oh, I was scouted," but that means nothing.

我總是說：「噢，是星探發掘的」，但答了等於無答

The real way that I became a model is

我當上模特兒真正的途徑是

I won a genetic lottery, and I am the recipient of a legacy,

我中了張遺傳樂透，得到豐富的傳承之寶

and maybe you're wondering what is a legacy.

你可能想何謂傳承之寶

Well, for the past few centuries

其實，過去幾個世紀

we have defined beauty not just as health and youth

我們定義的美，不只是健康、年輕

and symmetry that we're biologically programmed to admire,

以及對稱美，這些人類天生就欣賞的特質

but also as tall, slender figures,

還有高瘦的身形

and femininity and white skin.

女性韻味和白皮膚

And this is a legacy that was built for me,

而這正是一件為我打造的傳承之寶

and it's a legacy that I've been cashing out on.

也是件一直幫我賺進鈔票的傳承之寶

And I know there are people in the audience

我知道在座觀眾

who are skeptical at this point,

此時有些人或許會抱有懷疑

and maybe there are some fashionistas who are, like,

甚至有些時尚人士會說

"Wait. Naomi. Tyra. Joan Smalls. Liu Wen."

"慢着，還有娜歐蜜、泰拉、瓊絲莫斯和劉雯呢"

And first, I commend you on your model knowledge. Very impressive.

首先，我十分欣賞你對模特兒界的知識 很令人讚嘆

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

But unfortunately I have to inform you that in 2007,

但不幸的，我要告訴你，在 2007 年

a very inspired NYU Ph.D. student counted

一位受到啟發的紐約大學哲學博士生統計了

all the models on the runway, every single one that was hired,

所有在伸展台上的模特兒，每一位被聘請的

and of the 677 models that were hired,

發現在 677 位模特兒當中

only 27, or less than four percent, were non-white.

只有 27 位，低於 4%，是非白人

The next question people always ask me is,

第二個人們經常問的問題是

"Can I be a model when I grow up?"

「我長大後可以成為模特兒嗎？」

And the first answer is, "I don't know, they don't put me in charge of that."

第一個答案是：「我不知道呢，這不是我作主的」

But the second answer, and what I really want to say to these little girls is, "Why?

但第二個答案，也是我真正想對那些小女孩說的是： "為什麼呢？

You know? You can be anything.

你的出路之廣

You could be the President of the United States,

你可能成為美國總統

or the inventor of the next Internet,

或是新一代網路的發明家

or a ninja cardio-thoracic surgeon poet,

又或是集忍者、心胸肺外科醫生、詩人於一身的人

which would be awesome, because you'd be the first one."

這一定會很棒，因為你會是第一個這樣的人

(Laughter)

（笑聲）

If, after this amazing list, they still are like,

如果聽完這讓人讚嘆的清單，他們依然說：

"No, no, Cameron, I want to be a model,"

「不，不，卡梅倫，我想做模特兒」

well then I say, "Be my boss."

我會說：那你自己決定吧

Because I'm not in charge of anything,

因為主宰一切的人不是我

and you could be the editor in chief of American Vogue

你可能會成為美國《時尚》雜誌的總編輯

or the CEO of H&M, or the next Steven Meisel.

或是 H&M 的總裁 或是第二位Steven Meisel（知名攝影師）

Saying that you want to be a model when you grow up

與其說你長大後想當模特兒

is akin to saying that you want to win the Powerball when you grow up.

就像是說你長大後想中樂透

It's out of your control, and it's awesome,

兩者都是很棒，但都無法掌控

and it's not a career path.

並且也都不能當做職涯

I will demonstrate for you now 10 years of accumulated model knowledge,

我將告訴您十年累積而來的模特兒知識

because unlike cardio-thoracic surgeons,

因為不像是心胸肺外科醫生

it can just be distilled right into -- right now.

我的經驗可以立刻被濃縮並立刻展示

So if the photographer is right there

比方說，如果攝影師站在那裏

and the light is right there, like a nice HMI,

燈光從那兒打過來，像是一盞不錯的 HMI 燈

and the client says, "Cameron, we want a walking shot,"

而客戶說：「卡梅倫，我們想要來個走步特寫」

well then this leg goes first, nice and long, this arm goes back, this arm goes forward,

那就先踏出這條修長的美腿 這手臂往後擺，另條手臂往前

the head is at three quarters, and you just go back and forth,

頭望四分之三側，而你來回的走

just do that, and then you look back at your imaginary friends,

你往後看着那些幻想出來的朋友

300, 400, 500 times. (Laughter)

重複以上 300、400、500 次。（笑聲）

It will look something like this. (Laughter)

結果看起來就像是這樣（笑聲）

Hopefully less awkward than that one in the middle.

希望沒有中間那張的怪

That was, I don't know what happened there.

那張…我也不知發生什麼事

Unfortunately after you've gone to school,

不幸的是，當你上學後

and you have a résumé and you've done a few jobs,

有份履歷表，做了數份工作之後

you can't say anything anymore,

你就再也不能說大話了

so if you say you want to be the President of the United States,

例如你說你想做美國總統

but your résumé reads, "Underwear Model: 10 years,"

但履歷寫着：「內衣模特兒：十年」

people give you a funny look.

人們一定覺得你很奇怪

The next question people always ask me is, "Do they retouch all the photos?"

下一個人們常問的問題是：「照片全都有修過嗎？」

And yeah, they pretty much retouch all the photos,

是的，照片幾乎全都被修過了

but that is only a small component of what's happening.

但只是整個過程的一小部分

This picture is the very first picture that I ever took,

這是我第一次拍的照片

and it's also the very first time that I had worn a bikini,

也是我第一次穿比基尼

and I didn't even have my period yet.

當時我生理期還沒來

I know we're getting personal, but

我知道話題有點扯到隱私了

I was a young girl.

不過，那時我是個小女孩

This is what I looked like with my grandma just a few months earlier.

那是我在那數個月前與祖母合照的模樣

Here's me on the same day as this shoot.

這兩張是同日拍的照片

My friend got to come with me.

我朋友也跟著我來

Here's me at a slumber party a few days before I shot French Vogue.

這是我在替《時尚》雜誌法國版拍攝前幾天 在一場睡衣派對中拍的

Here's me on the soccer team and in V Magazine.

這是我與足球隊合照，和刊於 V 雜誌的照片

And here's me today.

而這是今日的我

And I hope what you're seeing is that

我希望你們看到的是

these pictures are not pictures of me.

這些並非我真正的照片

They are constructions,

它們是被製作的

and they are constructions by a group of professionals,

由一群專業人士所製作

by hairstylists and makeup artists and photographers and stylists

髮型師、化妝師、攝影師，還有造型師

and all of their assistants and pre-production and post-production,

以及他們的助手，經過前期策劃以及後期製作

and they build this. That's not me.

是他們建置出來的，那不是我

Okay, so the next question people always ask me is,

另一個經常有人問的問題是

"Do you get free stuff?"

「妳可以拿到免費東西嗎？」

I do have too many 8-inch heels which I never get to wear,

我的確有太多沒在穿的八吋高跟鞋

except for earlier,

除了剛才那雙

but the free stuff that I get

但是要說我得到的免費物品

is the free stuff that I get in real life, and that's what we don't like to talk about.

就是日常生活中能免費得到的事 我們不愛談論這些事

I grew up in Cambridge,

我在劍橋長大

and one time I went into a store and I forgot my money

有一次我到商店購物，忘了帶錢包

and they gave me the dress for free.

他們便把裙子送給我

When I was a teenager, I was driving with my friend

在我青少年時期，有次乘朋友開的車

who was an awful driver and she ran a red and of course,

她開得很差，闖了紅燈，而當然

we got pulled over,

被警察攔截了

and all it took was a "Sorry, officer,"

結果我們只說了聲「抱歉，警察」

and we were on our way.

我們馬上就被放行了

And I got these free things because of how I look,

而我之所以得到這些待遇，皆因我的樣貌

not who I am, and there are people paying a cost

而非我本身，然而卻有人得付出代價

for how they look and not who they are.

只因他們的樣貌而非他們本身

I live in New York, and last year,

我住在紐約，在去年

of the 140,000 teenagers that were stopped and frisked,

140,000 個被攔截搜查的年輕人中

86 percent of them were black and Latino,

86％ 是黑人和拉丁裔人

and most of them were young men.

而絕大部分都是年輕男子

And there are only 177,000 young black and Latino men in New York,

其實紐約只有 177,000 名年輕黑人和拉丁裔男子

so for them, it's not a question of, "Will I get stopped?"

所以對他們而言，並不是「我會否被攔截？」

but "How many times will I get stopped? When will I get stopped?"

而是「我究竟會被攔截多少次？何時會輪到我？」

When I was researching this talk,

當我在研究今日的講題時

I found out that of the 13-year-old girls in the United States,

我發現在美國的 13 歲少女中

53 percent don't like their bodies,

53% 不滿意自己的身材

and that number goes to 78 percent by the time that they're 17.

而到他們 17 歲時，數字更升至 78%

So the last question people ask me is,

最後一個別人問我的問題是

"What is it like to be a model?"

「做模特兒的感覺是怎樣？」

And I think the answer that they're looking for is,

我想他們期待的答案會是：

"If you are a little bit skinnier and you have shinier hair,

「如果你再瘦一點，頭髮再亮麗一些

you will be so happy and fabulous."

你就會感到開心、美好」

And when we're backstage, we give an answer

而當我們回到後台，我們給的答案

that maybe makes it seem like that.

也許聽起來就像是那樣

We say, "It's really amazing to travel,

我們說：「可以周遊列國很棒

and it's amazing to get to work with creative, inspired, passionate people."

與有創意、靈感並充滿熱情的人一起工作也很棒」

And those things are true, but they're only one half of the story,

誠然如此，這不過只是故事的一半

because the thing that we never say on camera,

因為我們永遠不會對着鏡頭說

that I have never said on camera,

我之前從來沒有在鏡頭上說過

is, "I am insecure."

就是：「我沒有安全感」

And I'm insecure because I have to think about

我無安全感，因為我時刻要記掛

what I look like every day.

我今天看起來怎麼樣

And if you ever are wondering,

如果你仍然在想：

"If I have thinner thighs and shinier hair, will I be happier?"

「如果我的腿更修長，頭髮更光澤，我會更開心嗎？」

you just need to meet a group of models,

你只需跟一群模特兒見面

because they have the thinnest thighs and the shiniest hair and the coolest clothes,

因為他們都有最修長的美腿，最具光澤的頭髮 還有最酷的衣服

and they're the most physically insecure women probably on the planet.

她們卻是世界上對自己身體最沒安全感的女性

So when I was writing this talk, I found it very difficult

所以，當我在撰寫講稿時，我發覺

to strike an honest balance, because on the one hand,

要在坦誠的基礎上取個平衡很困難，因為一方面

I felt very uncomfortable to come out here and say,

我覺得十分不安，當我出來說：

"Look I've received all these benefits from a deck stacked in my favor,"

「看，我得到一大堆它人給的好處」

and it also felt really uncomfortable to follow that up with,

然而更不自在的是接着說：

"and it doesn't always make me happy."

「但這並不總是讓感到開心」

But mostly it was difficult to unpack a legacy

不過其實最難說出口的，就是去講述

of gender and racial oppression

傳承下來的性別及種族壓迫

when I am one of the biggest beneficiaries.

因我是其中一位最大的得益者

But I'm also happy and honored to be up here

不過我也很開心和榮幸，今天能站到台上

and I think that it's great that I got to come

而且我覺得很棒，因為我可以不用

before 10 or 20 or 30 years had passed and I'd had more agency in my career,

在 10、20 或 30 年過去後 事業更蓬勃發展時才來

because maybe then I wouldn't tell the story of how I got my first job,

因為屆時我可能就不會再說我如何找到第一份工作

or maybe I wouldn't tell the story of how I paid for college,

或是我如何湊錢交大學學費

which seems so important right now.

這些在此時對我很重要的故事

If there's a takeaway to this talk, I hope it's that

若要在這次演講有些收穫，我希望

we all feel more comfortable acknowledging

大家都能更坦誠承認

the power of image in our perceived successes

形象的威力，去審視我們以為的成功

and our perceived failures.

以及我們曾經以為的失敗

Thank you. (Applause)

謝謝。（掌聲）