and argument season has already arrived.

而且辯論的季節已經快到了。

America has never been so connected

美國人從來沒有像現在這樣團結

and divided.

和分裂。

People are losing friendships,

人們會失去友誼、

disowning family members, and it's only going to get worse.

斷絕家人關係，情況只會變得更糟。

I'm Peter Boghossian and I'm an expert

我是 Peter Boghossian，

on having impossible conversations.

我是一個專家，研究「不可能的對話」。

I'm going to share three simple techniques

我要分享三個簡單的技巧，

you should incorporate to ensure your conversations

你應該試著結合應用，

are productive.

確保你的對話是有效的。

Sometimes arguments are presented as black and white

有時候爭論代表正反兩面，

and you get lost in a "Yes, it is. No, it isn't" spiral.

然後你會迷失在「是或不是」之中。

Here's something small you can do

這裡有幾個技巧你可以運用，

to add perspective and have a productive conversation.

增加觀點並且有效的對話。

Introduce scales.

運用量表。

Simply ask, "On a scale from one to ten,

簡單來說：「量表從一到十，

how confident are you that belief is true?"

你有多大的信心相信你的信念是真的？」

This lets you know how entrenched someone is

這可以讓你知道，

in their position.

某人在他們的立場上有多堅固。

You can also ask for scales on an issue.

你也可以要求對某個問題進行評分。

For example, you may have heard,

舉例來說，你可能聽到，

"America is a patriarchy."

「美國是父權制度。」

and then found this statement bizarre.

然後你覺得這個說法很怪異。

That comment usually initiates a "No, it isn't.

評論通常會引發「不是或是」

Yes, it is." argument.

的論點。

You can escape this

你可以藉由量表，

yes-no dead end by introducing a scale.

來避免這個是-不是的死胡同。

Suppose Saudi Arabia is nine out of 10 in patriarchy.

假設沙烏地阿拉伯在父權制度是佔十分之九。

"Where is the U.S. on the same scale?"

「那用同樣的標準衡量，美國佔多少？」

Asking for a scale helps break away

要求量表有助於擺脫

from all-or-nothing thinking.

非黑即白的想法。

It also gives room for people to move along that scale

這也給予人們空間，

without giving up their position entirely.

再不放棄自己立場的情況下移動量表。

And if either position moves toward the other,

而且如果任何一個方向朝著另一個方向發展，

you know your conversation wasn't meaningless.

你就會知道自己的對話是有意義的。

When we argue we're asked often angrily or dismissively

當我們在爭辯時，

for evidence of our claims.

我們經常會生氣或不屑一顧地被要求提供證據。

But it's rare to ask,

但很少有人問：

"What evidence might actually change your mind?"

「哪些證據可以確實改變你的想法？」

This question isn't a threat and you're not

這個問題不是威脅，

telling anyone anything.

而且你也沒有告訴任何人任何事情。

You're just inviting someone to question their own beliefs

你只是讓他們以非威脅式的方式，

in a non-threatening way.

質疑他們自己的信念。

Here's how you do it.

這是你的操作方式。

First, state their position in a way

首先，以他們熱情同意的方式，

they'd enthusiastically agree.

陳述他們的立場。

This will ensure you're on the same page.

這樣可以確保你們在同一陣線。

Then, ask a disconfirmation question.

然後，問一個不確定性的問題。

Ask, "How could that belief be wrong?

問：「如果這個信念是錯的呢？

I'm not saying it is wrong,

我不是說它是錯的，

but under what conditions would you change your mind?"

但是在什麼情況下會改變你的想法？」

Now you're in a conversation.

現在你在對話中。

Asking the disconfirmation question

問不確定性的問題是一種真誠的方式，

is a good-faith way of giving people the space

可以給人思考、

to consider and self- critique their position.

和自我評斷立場的空間。

Who knows? You both may find some common ground

誰知道呢？你們可能會發現一些共通點，

or learn something.

或是學到一些東西。

People often confuse the ability

人們通常將了解事情的能力，

to know something with actually knowing something.

和實際了解事情混淆。

This phenomenon is known as the "unread library effect."

這種現象被稱為「未讀庫效應」。

In 2001 researchers asked people to rate

在 2001 年，研究家要求人們評估自己

their confidence about how toilets work.

對馬桶運作方式的信心程度。

Participants were then asked to explain verbally and give

參與者被要求提供口頭解釋，

as much detail as possible.

並且盡可能提供詳細的細節。

Then they rated their confidence again.

然後他們再評估一次自己的信心程度。

And you guessed it, this time subjects

你猜對了，

admitted to being far less confident.

這一次他們都承認自己信心不足。

We can access the library,

我們可以進到圖書館，

but we don't know anything unless we borrow and read

除非我們借或閱讀書籍，

the book.

否則我們並不知道任何知識。

It's O.K. to not know everything,

沒辦法無所不知是正常的，

but our confidence should scale

但我們的信心程度應該

with our actual knowledge.

要和我們實際知道的知識成正比。

Here's how you can use this in conversation.

你可以在對話中使用這個方法。

Start by admitting you don't know enough

首先你要承認你還不夠了解，

to hold a firm position and ask

因此沒有堅定的立場，

for explanations in as much detail as possible.

然後要求對方盡可能提供詳細的解釋。

You might ask, "What do you think?"

你可以問：「你怎麼想的？」

"How do you know that?"

「你怎麼知道的？」

If your partner is an expert,

如果對方是個專家，

you might both be rewarded with a good lesson.

你們兩個可能會學習到很好的一課。

Otherwise, you might both learn

否則，

that you need to learn more.

你可能要多了解一些資訊。

Improving our conversations is vital

對話使我們可以解決共同的問題，

because it enables us to solve shared problems.

因此改善對話方式非常重要。

We have some very serious problems

我們有一些非常嚴重的問題需要討論，

that we need to be talking about and generating

並且提出

solutions to.

解決方法。

But unless we're having conversations,

但除非我們進行對話，

that's impossible.

否則那是不可能的。