Yeah.

Well, we're here to talk about Santa Claus.

Where does Santa Claus live?

I know! Um, the North Pole.

What else do you know about Santa?

He's chubby.

- Too much cookies huh? -Yeah.

Well, mom and I got something we need to tell you.

Can we break some news to them?

- We're just telling him? - Yeah.

Oh. (laughs)

Santa isn't real.

Do I ever tell you Santa Claus is not real?

No, I just figured that one out. (laughs)

This is Mrs. Claus and this is Santa.

I knew it.

I kinda knew it.

Santa Claus is not real.

I told ya.

I told you.

You know that Santa's not real?

Err. Wrong.

Santa Claus is real.

Yes.

Where at?

Cascade Mall and the line was huge.

Well, Santa's not real, sorry.

Have you ever wondered how Santa can be at every mall in all these different places at one time?

The more people that believe in Santa Claus, the more power he has to fly.

Ohh.

Mommy is the one that writes "from Santa"

So she's lying to you.

She's a liar.

Mommy just reads it.

And then I throw it away.

Mom!

(laughing)

But she's Mrs. Santa.

No you're not.

Mrs. Santa has white hair.

But you have dark hair.

But do you remember one time you asked me, you said,

"Why Santa Claus come down from chimney but he did not get a burn?"

Every single person that celebrates Christmas does not like put their chimney on fire.

Okay.

Nobody wants to kill Santa Claus. Nobody does.

Well, mommy really feel like we're a terrible person now because we are telling the truth.

Santa Claus is not real.

You are not telling the truth.

Yes, it actually depends what the situation is.

The situation is,

telling you that Santa isn't real.

I don't believe that situation.

But mom and I bring you gifts.

What happens to little boys and girls that don't believe in Santa Claus?

Well.

They do Kwanzaa or Hannukah.

Well. Besides that.

You're getting older Kayla.

So it's time for you to know that Santa's not even real.

It is real.

What's your idea though?

My idea is that's a big fake.

And no. Santa is real.

Well, I think we all have a little...

Case closed.

And you remember when you put milk and cookies?

I was the one who drank the milk.

So you were Santa?

I was the fake Santa.

So then all this time, I've been thinking that Santa ate the cookies?

(laughs)

Yeah.

But the cookies are really good.

Why don't you want to believe the situation?

Cuz Santa is real.

No he's not.

Yes he is.

Nope!

Yes.

Sorry.

Yes.

Sorry! You're out of luck.

What do you think?

Whatever.

Okay.

Don't look at me mean!

The Michael Jackson song we listened to all the time "I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus,"

you wanna know why mommy was kissing Santa Claus?

And Daddy wasn't there?

Daddy did not hear. Daddy did not see it.

What is going on?

Because Daddy IS Santa Claus.

And that's the reason Mommy kissed Santa.

Your life is a lie. Tria.

I'm just kidding, you're fine.

Ok look.

I could prove that you two, you're not Santa and you're not Ms. Claus.

Ok, prove it.

Ask me a question that only Santa would know the answer to.

Tell me all the reindeer names.

Well, there's Dancer and Prancer and

Qbert.

(Maddox laughing)

Okay.

You're not Santa.

How many did I say?

You feel okay with that?

Yes.

I see some tears.

You okay?

Yes.

Are you going to still cooking?

Mmhmm.

Your cookies are really good.

(both laughing)

I make them with all my heart.

Awww

I think if Santa's real in your heart, then he should be real.

And you should look forward to him on Christmas Day.

You have everything you want?

Sort of, yeah.

You have me and your mom.

I know.

That's all you need right?

(shrugs)

(Dad laughing)

What's Christmas all about you guys?

Family.

Family?

I want you to be Santa.

You want me to be Santa?

Yeah.

I'll be Santa.

I'm the Santa.

No you're not.

You don't believe me.

(laughs)

Why do you not believe me that I'm Santa?

I think that you're my wish person.

I'm the wish person?

What's a wish person?

Sometimes you make my wishes come true.

While we're here being truthful,

do you know who the Tooth Fairy is?

Oh yay!

It's your mother.

Nope!

So you met Santa Claus at your school the other day, at the pancake breakfast at your school.

Yeah, but that's the fake Santa Claus.

That's Santa Claus's helper though.

How do you know it was a fake Santa?

Oh snap! That's a good question.