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  • - Wow.

  • That's much better than what you usually throw on the table.

  • Hello and welcome to a very special edition of Mystery Tech,

  • featuring money, because yes,

  • I actually get to buy my own things this time.

  • Thanks, Ken.

  • The rules are very simple.

  • I have a $200 budget to order things

  • from a little site called Wish.

  • Now, a little stipulation

  • is I have to use this blitz-buy thing,

  • so as soon as I hit this button,

  • a 10-minute timer will start.

  • How many items to I get?

  • 20, okay.

  • All right, I've unlocked 20 products.

  • Let's see what we got.

  • Well, the first thing is the, what is this, a smartwatch?

  • I mean, that seems reasonable.

  • This actually looks good, right?

  • - [Matt] You need that.

  • - All right.

  • What the, what are these sneakers?

  • Yo.

  • - [Matt] Get some sneakers.

  • - Some red fashion sneakers?

  • Yeah, yeah, I'm about that.

  • There's an 11 inch 4G network Android large-screen tablet

  • for $75.

  • I'm gettin' red because why not.

  • Oh God, I've already spent $145.

  • Oh.

  • Man, I feel like I've already got everything cool.

  • - [Ken] Well, now you're forced to buy

  • things that are not cool.

  • Welcome to Mystery Tech.

  • - What if I just cheat and go into normal Wish

  • and look for other stuff that's cool?

  • All right, I'm just gonna cheat.

  • Oh, a 4GB free classic games thing?

  • Yeah, yeah, okay.

  • All right.

  • Oh what the, oh it's a Vita.

  • Oh wait, no I want this one.

  • Oh look, a Game Boy.

  • Yo, I wanna Game Boy.

  • Yeah, yeah, yeah, hook me up.

  • $14?

  • Look, you can buy fake money.

  • There's 100 $100 bills for $1.

  • I mean, let's be real,

  • this stuff all looks basically like hot garbage.

  • Ooh, hello.

  • We could get a Huawei SD card,

  • apparently 256GB for $3.

  • I don't see how we can go wrong here.

  • - [Ken] Get definitely two of those.

  • - Ah, it's a corset for a guy, aight.

  • Aight.

  • Yo, fake Joy-Cons?

  • Dude, these Joy-Cons are like double the size.

  • I am absolute buying them.

  • Wait, for Wii U, for Switch,

  • or for Switch Precision Edition?

  • - [Ken] What's a Switch Precision Edition?

  • - [Austin] I dunno, I guess we're about to find out.

  • It's $33.

  • There's also fake Pro controller, should we do that?

  • - [Ken] Yeah, yes.

  • - Mean, it looks kinda like it.

  • So that, my friends, is everything we need from Wish.

  • So I guess now we're just gonna have wait, like,

  • three months for this stuff to show up

  • and see if it's any good.

  • I don't think it will be, though.

  • (weird ululating)

  • - [Matt] Three months later.

  • - Okay, so it has been a couple months

  • and we finally have all of our Wish items

  • as well as a much less full-featured facial hair.

  • So let's see what garbage town we have to deal with.

  • It's been so long I've actually forgotten

  • what we ordered, at this point.

  • Oh yeah, this stupid thing.

  • Oh, it came with an adapter?

  • Aight.

  • So this is our Huawei 256GB microSD card,

  • which cost like, how much was it?

  • - [Ken] $5.75.

  • - Oh yeah.

  • So less than $6.

  • Now, I'm incredibly suspicious

  • that this is actually a 256GB card.

  • It is almost certainly not a Huawei microSD card either,

  • judging by the generic memory card box.

  • Some of the listed capacity

  • is used for formatting and other functions

  • and is not available for storage.

  • Something tells me that by some

  • is going to be like, 240 of the 256GB.

  • I believe Linus did a video

  • showing how some of the SD cards

  • that seem to have a lot of capacity

  • are actually fake and instead,

  • when you start to fill them up,

  • they delete old files.

  • So I'm going to try to transfer a bunch of footage over

  • and see if it actually will work.

  • So I pull up properties, it shows as a 249GB drive.

  • I mean, that actually would be technically correct.

  • That's strange.

  • Is this actually real?

  • Dude, it's at 65KB a second right now.

  • I don't think I have the patience for this.

  • Pssh.

  • That had way more bounce than I thought.

  • Oh, it's the stupid fake Joy-Cons.

  • You know that Wish sponsors the Lakers?

  • Literally the only logo on Lakers jerseys is Wish.

  • I mean, at first glance you might be forgiven

  • for thinking that these are real Joy-Cons,

  • but they feel like they're almost twice as big.

  • Lemme grab a real set of Joy-Cons.

  • So for comparison, this is what a legit Joy-Con looks like.

  • Now, it's roughly the same sorta shape,

  • although on the back,

  • you can see that there's a little bit of a ridge,

  • but it's just way bigger.

  • Like, way bigger.

  • (laughs)

  • My Switch is now just like, an inch wider.

  • (laughs)

  • Oh, it worked.

  • Ayyy, look at that.

  • It shows up as two actual, real Joy-Cons.

  • So if I attach these,

  • it actually will not charge them, though,

  • so I can use it as like a normal, wired Joy-Con,

  • but it's still actually connected via Bluetooth.

  • So it will drain the battery like this.

  • Dude, this is actually really not that bad.

  • I mean, the buttons don't feel quite as nice

  • and I wish they actually would charge,

  • but like, I mean like, I'm not doing very well here, but.

  • Now, I will say one thing, the fact that they have

  • this little lip on the outside,

  • which, even though they're bigger,

  • they actually kinda fit better in my hands

  • The standard Joy-Cons, they're fine,

  • but I kinda feel like I have a little bit

  • of a claw grip sometimes,

  • whereas this feels a little bit better,

  • I'm not gonna lie.

  • It still feels cheap, but not bad.

  • Aha.

  • So the next part, which is probably a little less weird,

  • is these Nintendo Switch Pro controller,

  • or the Pro controller for N Switch,

  • because obviously it's not a Nintendo product.

  • I mean, at first glance this looks exactly

  • like a standard Pro controller.

  • This looks straight up like they just used

  • the original mold for this.

  • It literally, on the back, says support.nintendo.com.

  • I think they actually took a legit mold

  • of the real Pro controller

  • and just removed the word Nintendo here,

  • 'cause that's exactly where Nintendo would be.

  • It says, support Germany for Nintendo.

  • I mean, this is just a Pro controller.

  • (laughs)

  • The buttons feel the same, the sticks feel the same.

  • Actually, hang on a second.

  • Can I change my smart steering?

  • Okay.

  • Dude, it even has the gyroscope.

  • If you feel a little bit uncomfortable

  • buying something which is very, very obviously a knockoff,

  • I totally understand why you wouldn't wanna get this,

  • but this is, as far as I can tell,

  • straight-up a Pro controller.

  • Now, maybe it'll break at some point,

  • maybe there's a train outside

  • that's gonna sort of step on my line,

  • but like, this is legit just a Pro controller

  • that someone just stripped off the Nintendo badge

  • and is selling it for like, half the price.

  • Oh, god.

  • The fake money.

  • Okay, does this look real on camera right now?

  • 'Cause this is about the fakest thing I've ever seen.

  • It's mostly just incredibly blurry.

  • Like, it looks like if you printed this yourself

  • on a printer from 1999,

  • that's what it looks like.

  • For fake money, it doesn't say fake money anywhere.

  • There's no like, for prop, comedy use only or anything,

  • there's literally just a little bit

  • of Chinese writing on the back

  • and that's it.

  • This actually looks like it's probably illegal.

  • Wait, is this illegal?

  • I think this is, oh.

  • These things bounce so weirdly, right?

  • All right, we'll just put my fake money out of the way.

  • I will say one thing, this is very, very well packaged.

  • Oh, it's the fake iPad, excellent.

  • Oh wait, no it's not an iPad, is it?

  • It kinda looks like one from the front.

  • Actually, well, it looks like one from all angles.

  • I mean, not gonna lie.

  • This is like, not the worst fake iPad I've ever seen.

  • I mean, they've kinda got like the little notch here.

  • That actually does seem to be real metal.

  • That screen does not look good, though

  • And this is definitely a fake button.

  • That doesn't do anything.

  • I dunno, I think if you show this to Grandma,

  • she'd probably think you had an iPad

  • and not a $52 tablet that's garbage-town, that's dead also.

  • I'm not gonna lie,

  • so far we've actually been doing pretty well.

  • There have definitely been some busts,

  • but things like the Switch controller seems cool,

  • the iPad, if it actually wants to turn on,

  • seems maybe okay.

  • Maybe.

  • Maybe.

  • Oh, all right.

  • In case you're curious, this is not an actual iPad.

  • - [Ken] Is that a headphone jack in the side?

  • - Oh yeah, (laughs), the headphone jack is on the side.

  • All right.

  • Android 8.1?

  • What?

  • Really?

  • That's actually not that bad.

  • Is this actually gonna be decent?

  • Like, I really did not think this was gonna be good,

  • but like, it actually doesn't seem like the worst thing

  • I've ever tried, especially for $50.

  • Although I guess, for $50,

  • you could get like, a Fire tablet.

  • Whoa, hey.

  • Update on this guy.

  • It has now magically jumped up to 19MB per second

  • on the transfer.

  • We're actually, is it working

  • or did it just like, fail over into the fake version

  • where it's deleting my old files?

  • Now I'm suddenly getting a little bit uncomfortable

  • with the idea that I just plugged a random microSD card

  • into my computer.

  • Maybe I shouldn't have done that.

  • That coulda been a really bad idea, actually.

  • - [Ken] I mean, it's a Huawei one, so what's the--

  • - (laughs)

  • - [Ken] What's the harm in that?

  • - That frame rate is really not good.

  • But 480p, come on man?

  • Is that the best you can do in 480p?

  • That ain't it.

  • So not great for video.

  • It sounds bad and it runs videos

  • at like, 12 frames per second.

  • Uh, maybe just buy a Fire HD 7, or anything else.

  • I bet you could get a used iPad for about this price.

  • - [Ken] Oh yeah, you probably can.

  • - Oh.

  • That looks much less terrible.

  • So this is our fake PSP.

  • So there are a lot of these kinda like, fake systems around,

  • but I've actually never really tried any of them, really.

  • Oh dude, it's like, supposed to be a mini Vita.

  • It even has all, like, the little triangles and stuff

  • on the back.

  • Whoa.

  • It's very exciting when you launch it.

  • Wait, is this just a bunch of ROMs?

  • I have Super Mario, Contra, Street Fighter, Crash Bandicoot.

  • Wait.

  • Is this thing legit just, like, an emulator?

  • Yo, dude, it's actually Super Mario.

  • Okay, this emulation's, uh, oh my god. (laughs)

  • Dude.

  • It's like a half-second delay when I press something.

  • I mean, this is legit, though!

  • Wait, wait, wait.

  • I'm tryin' to play Mario right now,

  • what are you doin', throwin' a Game Boy at me?

  • Wait.

  • Hold on.

  • I'm enjoying Mario, man.

  • What?

  • Wait, wait, dude, this is not bad.

  • I mean, it's still weird,

  • but I can't believe this is not hot garbage, man.

  • What?

  • Wait.

  • Wait, dude, this is not bad.

  • I mean, it's still weird, but.

  • Oh wait, what buttons do I actually have on the Game Boy?

  • Just A and B, right? (laughs)

  • Stay back.

  • Stay back. (laughs)

  • (laughs)

  • It's so mushy!

  • Come on!

  • Come on!

  • Yes!

  • Also, I just pulled my mic off.

  • I wanna keep playing with this.

  • But wait, hang on, what's 401 Game Boy thing?

  • Ooh.

  • You know what?

  • Yo, that's actually not bad.

  • All right.

  • 401.

  • So we have Super Mario, this thing's just loaded with ROMs.

  • It's just loaded with ROMs.

  • What is this?!

  • Pikachu.

  • What is that?!

  • Wait, what?

  • Wait, is this just,

  • - (laughs) - is this Dr. Mario?

  • I mean, it's like Tetris, but wasn't it,

  • I never played Dr. Mario,

  • but wasn't it kinda similar to this?

  • - [Ken] Yeah.

  • - All right, there's definitely a lot of doubles in here.

  • Like, they're primarily doubles.

  • Why am I small?

  • Do you see this?

  • I'm too, dude, I'm too small to jump!

  • (laughs)

  • How do you mess up Mario, man?

  • What the actual, what is this?

  • - [Ken] What?

  • What?!

  • (laughs hysterically)

  • Oh, now you gotta play it.

  • - Mario has throwing stars?!

  • Also, it runs like eight frames per second.

  • Yikes.

  • Oh my God, dude, what is this? (laughing)

  • What is this?!

  • All right, why is my screen flickering?

  • Wait, I think I lost my screen brightness.

  • Can you see that flickering?

  • I think I just lost my backlight.

  • We got, like, five minutes out of Super Mario 14

  • before it was lost to the sands of time.

  • Look, look, look how bad it is now! (laughs)

  • My screen's dead!

  • All that's really left to do now

  • is to see if this sketchballs microSD card actually worked.

  • So I come over to USB drive.

  • I mean, this actually looks like it might have transferred?

  • I just literally copied over Fortnite.

  • 33GB.

  • I mean, this works.

  • It definitely works.

  • I dunno if it'll actually fill up, and it's kinda slow,

  • but the microSD card is decent.

  • Sadly, the Game Boy had the most promise

  • and died after like three minutes.

  • I mean, who knows?

  • The Legend of Mario 14 may never be fully discovered.

  • (laughs)

- Wow.

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