"My fair share of bumpy roads and heavy winds."

"That's what made me what I am today."

"Now I stand here before you."

"What you see is a body crafted to perfection."

"A pair of legs engineered to defy the laws of physics."

"And a mind-set to master the most epic of splits."

Hamlet, Act I, Scene I

Some say that ever 'gainst that season comes

Wherein our Saviour's birth is celebrated,

This bird of dawning singeth all night long;

And then, they say, no spirit can walk abroad,

The nights are wholesome, then no planets strike,

No fairy takes, nor witch hath power to charm,

No fairy takes, nor witch hath power to charm,

So hallow'd and so gracious is the time.

Merry, merry christmas,

and Happy New Year to you all!

Greetings from Chuck Norris - The epic christmas split (FULL STORY)