if you want a business and life you love. And today we are gonna be interviewing an

amazing author, multiple New York Times bestselling author Brendon Burchard. And he’s got a

new book out called The Charge:  Activating the 10 Human Drives that Make You Feel Alive.

This is an amazing book. It’s really a cure for many of us if we feel restless and stressed

out and really just like we don't have the energy and the drive for life. The enthusiasm

for life that we know we could have. So let’s talk to the author and let’s learn a few

things about how we can activate our natural human drives. Hey everybody, it is Marie Forleo.

And you just saw me dancing with his book, and I’m gonna show it to you again. This

is called The Charge, and I am so honored today to have the incredible author Brendon

Burchard. Thank you so much for being with us on MarieTV.

Brendon Burchard: Hey Marie, I’m excited to be here. Thanks for having me, love all

your stuff.

Marie Forleo: Love all your stuff. So we’ve been on a little bit of a crash course for

a while. I have so many people in my audience that just adore your work, they adore The

Millionaire Messenger and I’m recommending that book all the time. But today we’re

gonna talk about your new book, which is called The Charge. And I know it’s your 4th book.

So many people in the audience, this is a little bit of an aside, you know, have dreams

of writing just their first book and you’re on your fourth. Does it feel... is that a

little surreal? Or...

Brendon Burchard: It is, it is. Well, it’s happened over the last 4 books in 8 years.

So it’s been a period of time in which it’s happened. But the last 2 were the ones that

really took off. Both of those happened so fast. I mean, 2 New York Times best sellers

in the last 2 years. And so, super fast, super surprising. But, I tell you, fun. I love it.

It’s, as we’ll talk about today, it’s an act of creative expression, which is what

really drives us anyway.

Marie Forleo: Yeah. And, you know, one of the things I wanna mention right what you

said there is so key. You wrote two books, but the second two were the ones that took

off.

Brendon Burchard: Yeah.

Marie Forleo: And, I think for many people whether they’re starting a business or,

gain, they’re writing a book, if they do something their first time out of the gate

if it’s not a blockbuster sometimes they can get down on themselves rather than looking

at the long term or the long term gain. Or, “Hey, this is just the beginning of my journey.”

Brendon Burchard: Right.

Marie Forleo: Did you experience any of that disappointment with your first book?

Brendon Burchard: No, you know, because I always... the journey to quote unquote success,

you know, it’s different from what most people think it is. Because especially when

they change genres or industries or jobs, they expect to start at the same level they

were at. So, right, you... let’s say for me, I was a consultant before I started doing

all of this. In corporate America I built change management and leadership programs.

Well, I spent 7 years doing that and I achieved this level of success. And then when I came

into the writing and the speaking and the teaching world, I want to start there. But

I knew... I said no, no, no, actually I’m gonna have to start here again. But here’s

the difference, is that first time it might take 7 to 10 years to build something significant

and kick some butt. The second time when you start to do something, that learning curve

and that growth curve is gonna be shorter because all the knowledge, skills, and you

developed over here, they’re going to come over here. So the key is that we always have

to remind ourselves, “Hey, you know what? Let’s take a little edge off. Maybe it took

7 to 10 years here. Now this one? It might take 2, 3, 4, 5, but it’ll be faster because

I have all that experience and that knowledge and that passion now, and I’m just more

worldly.” So it will happen, but we have to give ourselves time to climb the second

mountain. You know? You climb that first mountain if you're gonna go climb something new you

gotta realize you’ve gotta come down the first one and build yourself up. So I’ve

been, you know, all my life I’ve been a person, hopefully, who is present. And if

you have a lot of presence, you’re also willing to be pretty patient. You know?

Marie Forleo: I heard your little iPhone I was like, “Ooh! Is that my iPhone or your

iPhone?”

Brendon Burchard: Sorry about that.

Marie Forleo: No, don’t worry. Please, don't worry. My iPhone’s always going off. And

I see, I don't know if you see my face frozen like it was before.

Brendon Burchard: It just did.

Marie Forleo: It just did?

Brendon Burchard: Yeah.

Marie Forleo: Ok, well we’ll let me freeze and I’m sure if we have the audio, which

I can hear the audio on my end, we’re just gonna keep rocking and rolling.

Brendon Burchard: Ok.

Marie Forleo: So I love what you shared about the whole mountain idea and, you know, taking

your skills and your abilities and your experiences for one arena and knowing that they are gonna

transfer over and just that idea of having patience. And I think also being in it for

the long term. I think one of the things that some people can get caught up and one of the

things that may actually have people feel less charged in their life, which, you know,

we’ll get into the charge in a moment, but is those unrealistic expectations. Right?

Of instant success or overnight fame or all of that stuff. Where you have to really have

that vision of, you know, why are you doing this in the first place? And one of the things

I admire so much about you, Brendon, is it’s so clear how devoted you are to serving.

Brendon Burchard: Thank you.

Marie Forleo: And making a difference. And you can feel that in every video that I’ve

ever watched from you and the words that you put on the page. And I think that for all

of us, it’s really important to remember whether we’re writing a book or starting

a business or going on any journey in our life creating a great relationship that we

love, we gotta look at the long term and what do you really want out of this. You know?

Why are you really doing this?

Brendon Burchard: Yeah, it’s key, and I think a lot of... I mean, everyone’s watching

this or listening to this knows for sure that, you know, they’ve got passions and they’ve

got dreams. And I always say it’s fine to be unrealistic in your expectations for things

as long as you’re also giving yourself time to complete them. You know? It’s like no

one would ever think that you and I could be doing what we’re doing right now. But

we had... we did have a set of that, an unrealistic desire, a hunger, and a passion and a drive

in us. I mean, ambition is always unrealistic.

Marie Forleo: Yes.

Brendon Burchard: Because ambition requires us to look beyond where we’re at today.

And ambition should be unrealistic, it should allow us to stretch and grow and challenge

ourselves. The difference is, are you willing to love yourself along that process? Are you

willing to give yourself a break when you fall? Are you willing yourself... willing

to know that there’s a reason that you're doing all of this insanity and keep reminding

yourself of those things? And are you willing to, along the way, not get frustrated, but

keep your mental, you know, sort of... I call it your conscious dashboard clean and clear

and directed? And if you can do that, then the journey is gonna be fantastic.

Marie Forleo: I love that. I love that! I love what you shared and, you know, the unrealistic

ambition, I’ve found that to be true always. Some of my biggest dreams, they even sometimes

scare myself. But that’s what makes it exciting to go after.

Brendon Burchard: That’s right. The drive for challenge, right? And without that, what

are we doing every day? We’re waking up and we’re browsing on the internet. You

know? It’s like you become very undirected if you don't have ambitious drives. If you

don't have the things that are not only... it’s like most people, they feel like they

have to sometimes push themselves out of bed. And they have to push each day. And it’s

a struggle, because they don't have anything that’s pulling them. And when you have that

bigger desire, that bigger dream, that bigger challenge, and if that thing is compelling

to you and you love it, it’s going to pull you forward. And so it’s important to get

connected to that and excited about that and that thing will always seem unrealistic. It

was unrealistic for us to go to the moon, but Kennedy said it anyway. But it did take

to the end of the decade to do it. So, he understood that. And I think we all have to

give ourselves a little bit of breathing room right now because a lot of people are being

so hard on themselves right now because of the economy and where they might be at in

their business or where they’re starting. And if you’re down on yourself, you’re

never gonna be able to pick your business up.

Marie Forleo: Love that, that could be a tweetable. We might have that be a tweetable. So what

motivated you to write The Charge? Again, which is an amazing book and everyone watching

this right now, you guys need to get it. We’ll tell you where to do that below. But what

motivated you to write this particular book?

Brendon Burchard: You know, the journey began for me 16 years ago. So, a lot of people see

it as a short term thing with my books, but it began 16 years ago as I was in a pretty

dramatic car accident. And it taught me, you know, that at the end of our life we’re

going to ask 3 basic questions. And those questions are going to be: Did I live? As

in did I live my life vibrantly and fully? We’ll ask did I love? Did I love openly

and honestly and completely? And did I matter? Did I make a difference? And I knew those

were the questions that we’re gonna ask at the end, so I wanna live my life so that

I was really living and loving and mattering. But, like anyone else, I just get blocked

some days. It’s like, no I didn't really live my life today. I kind of, you know, bowed

out. You know? Or, I didn't really love today because I was scared because I got hurt one

time. Or I didn't make a difference because I don't know what I’m supposed to be doing

with my life. And so I started getting really serious in the areas of psychology, neuroscience,

and high performance studies. And so it’s been 16 years reading a book a week in one

of those areas. So I did a lot of research. All of it’s just been fascinating, like

what is it that drives us? And then last year, I lost my own charge. Last year I was in another

accident, apparently I shouldn't leave the country because both of them happened... I

think Denise, my wife, is gonna pull away my passport at some point. But, you know,

I left the country, I was in an ATV accident, and I got a brain injury. And it really rattled

my life. I got... I had... long story short, I had post concussive syndrome where I was

having a lot of trouble... because damage to my prefrontal left cortex, my cerebellum,

my hippocampus. I was having a lot of trouble with executive control and seeing what I was

supposed to be doing. I was having a lot of trouble with my attention span and connecting

with other people. My memory was down, my ability to make judgments was down, and it

took about 8 months to really overcome that concussion. And in that process, I had to

learn... like, I felt so bad, I had to figure out how do I activate things that will make

me feel alive? And I think a lot of people can relate, because there’s always something

in our lives that feel like, for me it was an injury. For other people it’s the status

of their life or the state of their business, and they get really trapped down. And at some

point we have to say, “Ok, this is an external reality. Maybe I can't fully control it. But

what is it that I could find in my life or create, more important, what can I generate

in my life that would make me feel alive despite all this?” And what’s fascinating about

this, Marie, I think as you read in the book is that if you... in my situation, if you

injure your brain they tell you to use your mind to fix it.

Marie Forleo: Interesting.

Brendon Burchard: Yeah, the neuroscientist says, “Oh wow, your prefrontal cortex is

firing really low. That’s why you can’t really see the future, you’re not being

able to have a good attention span, make good decisions, and connect with other people.

So, that part of the brain? We know how to activate that. So, think of these types of

things, challenge your mind in these types of ways, do these types of experiences that

will light that part up. Because as we light it up and it fires up, the neurons reconnect

or they strengthen, and it’s like rehab for your brain, but you use your mind and

your life experiences to do that.” And I had so much fun rebuilding my brain, literally,

that I thought, “Everyone needs to know about this.” These 10 human drives, if we

activate them, and we’re strategic about it and we’re consistent about it, we can

feel more alive than we’ve ever felt. And that’s not just, you know, self help hype.

That’s brain science. We can actually see those parts of your brain coming back to life

again. We can release the parts of the hormones in your body, like dopamine, vasopressin,

oxytocin, in a way that you feel alive and alert and engaged and connected with other

people at levels most people never experience. But all of that, we can self generate by the

way we use our mind and live our experiences.

Marie Forleo: And that’s one of the things that I love about the book, is your focus...

and I know you, just as a person, love to focus on neuroscience and the research and

you read so much. And that’s why I think this book is so important. And one of the