Is that just too on the nose?

Why not?

We're all Irish today.

Aren't we drinking our rose?

A as I wish it were under the l A sun.

As Irish as we can get.

I almost broke the law by not drinking immediately after Cheers.

You would have been well within your right to just murder me.

So I've watched you drink after weekly.

Oh, yeah, So I could have your carriage with driver could.

Who wants a Yugo from the cellar for parents?

Honestly, Welcome making moon.

Thanks for being here.

I'm coming.

Yeah.

Me and me and Troy have been trying to meet up for, like, years before we actually met.

I was like, You're Europe acts cool.

So am I.

Let's meet up and then and then Tender.

Yeah, I took that one.

I spent $5 to super like your ass.

This is what I do.

This'd is what I found out afterwards, though That kind of frustrated me.

No, it really frustrated me and I think spawned a much larger conversation.

We did meet before.

Are we almost met before?

We really met in the lovely state of Indiana.

Yeah, getting youtuber And you told me we're the same show.

Yeah.

Indie pop indie pop, aka 2050.

Sure, Sure.

Why not?

I mean, that's a number of people use.

And you didn't, uh, you didn't You didn't come up there was like there was weird, um, greenroom space.

That was, like, overlooking the whole thing.

Yeah, it was very weird.

Like a stadium.

Almost.

Yeah.

Think box tickets.

And the guy that played Q from Star Trek was there.

Yeah.

You were doing a signing.

A I had to do was like I'm done.

My job here is done.

$400,000 showed up, and there you are.

And it was for persona is the craziest thing.

Wow.

No, no, it was just nowhere.

2030 would have been Which?

My hair.

You're getting closer to it.

I the truth.

I want to look more like my son.

I was a toe head when I was born.

I was, like, bleached blond and my son came out.

It was fun.

When?

When?

When his firstborn.

I say fun.

Now, in retrospect, because when he was born our midwife, that was their attending the delivery, as they say, uh said look at that dark head of hair.

And I want his baby.

This and then we're like, is again.

It's my wife, you know.

It was red hair like, Is he gonna be a redheaded?

Is he gonna be whatever this is?

And then he's just blonde, blonde, blonde, blonde.

So I was like, I'm gonna look more like my son.

So I'm 40 30 shitting your pants, shitting my pants.

My son, uh, I had Daddy do day for a couple of days, and, um, I was like, Dude, you know what, man?

Just the dudes.

I don't have the rocket diaper.

Don't come diaper on your right.

Now.

He's walking around the house, and he kind of looks at me and just kind of does that blank stare.

I was like, Okay, what's going on?

And he shed on the floor?

Hell, yeah.

It looked like a novelty thing.

It wasn't like Oh, yeah, that's that's feces.

It was like, who put like a fake piece of poop like the poop emoji.

Just sit on the floor.

Yeah.

I mean, his name's traveller traveller.

He needs to do stuff like that.

He needs to be in the woods.

Yeah, Robin against trees outside Kidman.

He loves being outside.

No, the inside is, um, if we're inside were reading books or C four, um, or were wanting to go outside.

Um, every day is something new, like some new kind of fascination just comes online and you watch.

He's like, Oh, I understand this is the color blue you're watching his brain turn on.

Yeah, like switch by switch.

It's It's really it's the most fascinating thing that, personally, I've ever experienced.

Do you think because I have a brother who's like around the same age as you when he has kids and everything he always talks about?

He was, like, all over the place when he was younger.

He was an alcoholic.

He a lot of drugs, everything and then had a kid, and it was just like And now he's like one of the best people I know in the world, and he keeps talking about how he never understood it until he had a kid that like, No, I will die for this person.

Yeah, and he just immediately, like, had all this responsibility, and he was just matured completely.

It's a romantic notion when you're when it's hypothetical.

But when it becomes practical, Um, it's I can't I can't explain.

I can't describe it.

It's just like, Well, yeah, like, That's grass And that's a chair.

And I would I would willfully step in front of a bus to save and right when he was born like he's born and our midwife smelling like No, I've I've been 40 hours of just a triage happening from from whence he would spawn.

I don't need this and she smells.

And I was like, All right, I did.

And he smelled like honey like That's the only thing against Ravi.

He smelled literally like honey.

And that's not me, dude, I'm not a bodily fluids guy.

Um, and that was You have to get immediately into the suck.

And And Pam and I were in that for 40 hours straight.

No sleep, no rest, just constant sent.

Ain't no drugs.

Um, she's just she's a warrior, were by far by far the weaker species, a cz I saw.

What she did in my contribution to that, comparatively is just pales in comparison.

But I counted his fingers and toes because I wanted to see if he was normal and I realized that there was this fear in me that all of the truly terrible things that I've done in my life, which I can file justifiably under bad decisions and my youth and and just figuring stuff out which is hard to justify retroactively now in our culture look back.

So I was I was Yes, I was a douchebag.

And you and I could agree that the things that I said, the things that I did, I can look back now through 20 30 15 whatever years of wisdom ago, that's absolutely not acceptable.

But I did those things.

Yeah, And you just hope somehow, whether it be Grace or providence or something biologically happens that that acts as a filter, so that just stays with me and I become this filter.

I'm the sin eater for him.

Yeah, and traveler is the best of both of us.

He is the best of Pam.

He's the best of me and I and I hope that all I can hope for he's gonna make mistakes.

I just don't want him to make my mistakes.

And if I do that, then I'm being a good Yeah, well, that's the cycle, isn't it?

Either repeat your parents or you break the cycle.

Yeah, Neither do the same mistakes that they've done.

And then you just end up becoming your parents, or you end up breaking that cycle and learn from a dude.

I We've talked about mortgage Israelis in this book that success with.

Now I need to preface that Why, what with I was sitting at home.

Uh, yeah.

I want to know that text came through on your side.

I don't.

Well, it's also like time differences.

While I was just sitting at home, you know, kill him in as I was noticed.

And I was like, Dude, you gotta You gotta read this book that I'm into right now.

It's by Marcus Aurelius was like, Isn't that Russell Crowe from Gladiator?

What is it?

That was Richard Harris is character above the character played by or the movie by played by Russell Crowe.

But I I got um Yeah, I think I was just I was sitting out in my backyard and I've got this rocker that's there.

We got this fish pond that becomes a little haven.

I just sit out there in the morning and I I've read and I've been reading this book since March of 2018.

Um, it's 99 pages and I'm on page No, I think it just crossed over peace like 91 92.

There's times that I read just two lines and perfect example.

There's like three or four entries, and he talks about dance and he talks about theatre.

And he's just kind of, you know, the setup is this.

He was regarded as one of the greatest emperors of Rome and the last 12 years of his life.

I think from a war camp which gladiators sets up perfectly when they're Joaquin Phoenix comes in and is like I have I have.

I missed the battle on my son.

You've missed the war.

And he has that conversation where he makes Russell Crowe the If you've seen the movies bright, Um, but he's writing and he's he's being wistful, and he's kind of musing to himself into Russell Crowe's character is like, How will they remember me?

Will be remembered as a tire, nor the mirror is the philosopher.

Um, this is that book that he's writing, and it was never been to be published.

It was never meant to be read by a single other human.

It was called to himself and posthumously, they called it meditations.

The meditations of Marcus Aurelius.

Um and in it he is looking back to the past and he's going Oh, man, Epictetus and Socrates and all those guys, They had it right, So we always kind of and we do this Now we look back, we go though the good old days and and somehow they knew something that we did.

And then we've lost it and we need to get it back and we look to the future and go Well, hopefully, they're gonna figure this out in the future because you don't have it figured out yet.

But I'm certainly read this book, and I I feel like I can call myself a stoic and then I've I've really worked to get in a lot of ways I have I've worked to get a temper under control and to detach myself from, um, the trappings of life, of especially being an actor, to not fret about the job you didn't get or theater tension, that you don't have interest in the society that we have where it's all about.

Do you like me?

You like this?

Is this acceptable?

Validate me toe Learn to not need that.

Um, has been my struggle.

I feel good.

And then Sunday, this Sunday I'm in my car travelers in the back and we're just chilling Daddy do day.

We're going up and down Ventura and we're shitting on the floor Same day.

Excellent.

And he this is car This pre isjust cuts over three lanes and I slam on the brakes They're just trying to make the turn.

I traveler was kind of sing alone the songs he has great taste in music, by the way and he stops is what kind of freaks him out.

And so I kind of slow roll up next to the person for no reason.

And they go Sorry.

And I was like, No, it's not cool.

Yeah, and and there's a girl is driving a guy.

It's in the passenger seat, he rolls down the window, and, uh, he's like, what I was like, Hey, man, you just cut over three lanes.

I've got a 16 month old boy in the back.

You can't do that.

Okay?

It was all right, All right, all right.

She said you're sorry, asshole.

And I went Mmm.

And I feel it from the bottom of my feet.

All of the the angst and the righteous indignation just shoots up into my being fills me and I'm like, on the Asal I'm in trap.

I'm in a car and I'm like big bands and I just finally drives away and it stayed with me.

And then you start doing the whole play back, right Of like I should have said all this was the perfect thing to say.

That guy had done this if you hadn't been in the car and instantly I'm like, Holy shit, I'm my dad.

Oh, damn.

And I remember being 68 10 12 years old, multiple times when my dad would have road rage, I was like, Man, I'm I'm no matter.

I thought there was a lot of distance between me and that version of myself that I look, he's right next to me.

And it's the temptation is for that to be defeating.

And it just shows me that I I have more work to do.

Yeah, and so to go back to markets are alias he's he's talking about dance and he's talking about wrestling.

He's talking about feelings, talking about all these different art forms.

And he says to himself, What is your art and his responses To be good Master, that master that let that be your great masterpiece is that you are good because that is something that Justus painters air trying to master the craft of hands or sculptors or trying to really master the replication of anatomy or the realism of the body or of I don't know, this other still lifes were like a calling card for artists.

Did you know this because it showed the attention to detail?

Um, And so if you did a still life, it was like, that would be like my audition reel.

It would be like a demo reel to go.

Whoa!