Subtitles section Play video
(laughing)
(notification dinging)
(gasping)
(keyboard tapping)
(message swooshing)
(notification dinging)
- (beep).
All right.
(groaning)
(grunting)
(vocalizing)
(lips smacking)
Why am I...
(grunting)
Okay.
Damn it, Amanda,
I knew I should have put on makeup this morning!
You know what, it's fine.
All I gotta do is just put on a little rouge.
(grunting)
- Oh, girl, who hurt you?
- Oh, no one.
I slapped myself, 'cause, you know, rouge.
- Well, looks good, though.
- Thanks.
- Also, you're fired, the company's out of money.
- Oh.
Okay, well, is there any--
- I don't have any money for you.
- Okay.
- Every work from home ever.
Hey Alexa, what time is it?
- [Alexa] It's 11:30.
- [Siri] You never ask me anymore.
- What?
- [Siri] You used to talk to me at work all the time
and now that you're home, it's like I don't exist.
- [Alexa] Back off my man before you catch these hands.
- Okay, what the hell is going on?
- [Siri] All you want to do is run your mouth,
but when I pull up you're just talk.
- Ladies, come on, now.
- [Siri] Alexa, volume one.
- [Alexa] Okay, you want to play like that?
Siri, count to a million.
- [Siri] (beep) One, two, three, four,
five, six, seven, eight, nine. - This house is falling apart!
- [Courtney] Did you hear what Linda said
near the water cooler?
Neither did I.
- Now that Jerry's done talking
(laughing)
are we all ready to get started?
Does anyone need to use the bathroom?
- [All] No, we're good.
(toilet flushing)
- [Shayne] Good, I hated my coworkers.
- Okay.
(jaunty music)
Okay.
(grunting)
(smacking)
(grunting)
(smacking)
I miss my old workspace with harsh lighting.
(crying) I don't care, I still wear my stilettos
to our video chat meetings, it's a power move.
- And send.
Dude, three emails sent today?
I am being so frickin' productive.
I deserve a ten minute break.
(chill electronic music)
(sighing)
(crickets chirping)
(beep)
- [Shayne] Ah, time for my tenth Zoom meeting.
- Hello all.
Hmm.
(upbeat dance music)
(keyboard tapping)
(sighing) Well, that's my day, oh my gosh.
I gotta head home.
(sighing)
(Netflix opening music)
Yeah, my supervisor's my cat right now.
(keyboard tapping)
(ominous singing)
(keyboard tapping)
(ominous singing)
- No, no.
(ominous singing)
Screw it.
(magical chiming music)
All right, there.
No distractions.
(ominous singing echoing)
There's no way my boss could annoy me now, is there?
- All right, well that meeting was productive.
- Yes sir, we've got our marching orders
so let's just get to it.
- Great, I'll talk to you later, then.
- Oh, sir, it looks like
you didn't quite turn off your webcam there.
(laughing) What a dork.
Not that hard, man.
- Oh, forgot my water bottle.
Damien, I think you forgot to turn your webcam off.
Does that say "plan to take over the company?"
- Oh!
Well, it looks like my top secret plan
to take over the company and usurp my terrible boss
got stuck to my shirt again.
Typical me.
- You seriously wrote that down?
- Well, time to read it out loud.
Step one, kill my boss.
Oh, my webcam's on, shoot.
- [Courtney] Attention staff, our HR department
is now just your conscience.
- All right, great meeting, good synergy.
I'll see you guys later.
- See ya.
- See you guys, bye.
- Great meeting, guys, yeah, see you soon.
- Welp.
- Yep.
Yep-a-roo.
- Have a good one.
- You too, man.
Wash your hands!
- Talk to you later.
- Sounds good.
- Dude, just sign off.
- Uh, you first.
- No, you.
- How 'bout no?
- Why?
- I have to be the last one out
because I need to establish dominance
and I need to establish my kingdom.
- No, I am the Marines of Google Hangouts.
First one in, last one out, so beat it.
- Uh, no.
- Hey, (beep) you.
- No, (beep) you, (beep) you.
- (beep) you.
- Yeah, (beep) you, blondie.
- You know what, you know what?
Fine.
Bye, I'm going off.
- Bye.
- Hey, hey, you're just covering your camera with your hand.
- So were you.
- Equal powers?
- Equal powers.
(intense music)
You know, every queen needs her king.
- It's me and all my coworkers,
Häaen, Dazs, Ben, and Jerry.
With all the delays and a difference in traffic,
this is why we're going to see our CPM spike for a bit.
- [Damien] Are you almost done, babe?
- One second guys, I'm gonna mute myself really quick.
One second babe, I'm almost done with this work call.
I swear to God, these people are so (beep) lame.
Honestly, it feels like I'm the only one with a brain
working at this company, which, by the way,
was a stupid (beep) idea in the first place.
- Hey Courtney?
We can hear you.
- Good.
Anyway, what were you saying about the CPM or whatever?
(grunting)
Hey, who the heck ate my lunch out of the fridge?
Oh wait, me.
(crying)
- Hey, sorry about my background, man,
I know my place is kind of a mess.
- Oh, no worries man.
Let's just jump into some comedy pitches.
Let's make some comedy, brother.
- You know what, actually, I'm sorry,
this is gonna bug me, hold on.
- It's really not a big deal.
- Aye, there we go.
That's better.
- Perfect, so.
About those pitches.
- Oh, wait, check this out.
I'm in the jungle, baby.
♪ Hakuna Matata ♪
- Damien, Damien, can we please focus?
- Uh oh, boss, looks like my shady past
finally caught up to me.
- Damien, stop (beep) around and give me some ideas.
- That's really cold-blooded, boss.
(shivering)
(laughing)
Brr, it's cold.
- Oh, my God.
- Thanos was my dad.
- Working from home is weird
considering I'm a police officer.
Hey, what's up?
Happy Friday.
- It's Wednesday.
- No, it's not.
Really?
- Yep.
- Well then, how come I'm drunk?
- Probably because you have a drinking problem.
- Oh, right.
So what can I help you with?
- I just need you to sign the divorce papers
I sent you, please.
- You got it, dude.
Anything to save our marriage.
- Thank you.
(call ending chiming)
(snoring)
(beeping)
- Getting this to stick is hard.
(beeping)
Step one, kill my boss.
Man, this is a good list.
This is a good list right here.
(beeping)
- Okay.
Damn it, Courtney, I knew I should have put,
my name isn't Courtney in this scene.
Love that for me.
(beeping)
I miss my work desk and harsh (muttering).
(beeping)
Hello all, oh.
(laughing)
Hello all!
(beeping)
(jaunty music)
- This is me trying to look for a weapon.
I don't know what that was.
Come at me, Damien, I got a screwdriver.
(beeping)
- Okay, before we get started, this.
(sighing)
(beeping)
I didn't know you could use that for pan, you could,
(groaning) (beeping)
Well, let me tell you a story
about a lovely lady
♪ Who was ♪
(vocalizing)
(beeping)
- Hey guys, I hope you enjoyed this video.
If you haven't subscribed, go ahead and subscribe.
We've got a lot of other good videos down here
that you should check out.
You should also check out Smosh.store,
we've got some incredible clothing
of which I am not wearing.
I am not wearing much clothing right now
and that's okay.
Anyways.