Thank you for coming back and seeing us.

-Thank you for having me.

And thank you for the greatest audience on the planet.

-Oh, my goodness. [ Cheers and applause ]

That's pandering.

-It's just pandering. -It's just pandering.

-It's pandering, just pandering. You look terrific, by the way.

-Thank you very much. It's a lot of Botox.

-No. Just down the center.

-Just on one side. -Weird.

-Well, I start with the left side and see if I like it,

you know, and then, if I like it, then I'll do the right side.

Yeah. -Oh, all right.

-Yeah, this is how I smile.

[ Laughter ]

Hey, thank you for being here because I'm happy that you're --

-No, thank you. -No, thank you.

-Thank you for the blackout.

-Now, is that a -- Is that ring --

What is it? -Oh, yeah.

No, you've inspired this --

This is my wedding ring, you guys.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Yeah, sorry, ladies.

Yeah, it's made of rubber,

because after hearing -- seeing what happened with your finger

and you had a metal ring that got caught

and turned your finger into a little deli.

[ Laughter ]

And I said, "I'm getting --" I got rid of my ring.

-I'm so happy you did that. -Yeah, I got rid of my ring,

dated for a few months, and then -- No.

-That's ridiculous. -No, so I bought the rubber one.

-Oh, I'm so happy you have that. Good for you.

I think rings are too -- They're too strong.

-Yes, I agree.

I mean, you are the perfect --

You should be the spokesperson for rubber rings.

-Thank you.

See, that's the nicest thing that anyone's ever said.

-I will talk to them.

I know that you need the money, so I will --

I know you need a couple extra bucks.

-You know why -- You know why I'm happy that you're here?

Because I'm happy that you're alive.

-Oh, thank you.

-And survived what I think

is one of the craziest things anyone's ever done.

You swam with sharks.

-Oh, I thought you were going to say

have coffee with butter in it, but, no.

-[ Laughs ]

That's up there. That's up there.

That's number two, but -- -Yeah.

Or texted without autocorrect, so, yeah.

-Explain -- -That's a shark.

-That's -- That's real.

-That's a great white right there.

-That is not. -That's a great white.

That's a great white. -That is Nemo.

-That's a great white. Back me up on this.

-Yes, of course.

-Yeah, okay, that's me.

As you can see, that is -- I'm smelling fear, and I --

-What was this -- This is Shark Week?

-No, it's called midlife crisis.

[ Laughter ]

-I've seen that show, yeah.

I'm starring in it right now, yeah.

-Shark Week, Rob Riggle is hosting this special

called "Shark Trip: Eat. Prey. Chum."

And we --

There's five celebrities, who we all die.

And --

-I love Rob Riggle. He's a funny guy.

-He's so funny, and then it's Anthony Anderson

and Damon Wayans Jr. and Adam DeVine.

They said, "Would you like to go to the Bahamas

and swim with sharks?"

And that seemed like a good idea.

And then -- then they said, "Do you know how to scuba dive?"

And I was like, "Yeah."

And they go, "Really?" And I was like, "No."

And so then they go, "Great."

And -- No, and then we went down there, and there's 25 sharks.

There's ch-- And all --

As well, our shark expert is missing a hand and foot.

-Stop it. -Which --

-Stop it. -Yeah.

Which you go, "Are you really an expert?"

-Yeah.

"Expert," in air quotes.

-Right, and Anthony Anderson was there, who I thought I was --

I thought I was outgoing like a golden retriever,

like, always wanting approval from people.

He walks through -- We were at this place called Atlantis.

He walks through the casino.

Everyone starts recognizing him,

and he's like, "Are we taking pictures, mother[bleep]"

And I am not kidding.

And then he has a meet-and-greet for an hour

with everybody coming up to him.

-Yeah, he's the nicest dude.

-He can heal people with his hands.

-No, he cannot. No, no, no.

-He made this lady walk. -No.