But why do they stick out like that?

但為什麼它們會這樣突出呢？

Why are they made of that bendy cartilage tissue and not bone?

為什麼它們是由那種柔韌的軟骨組織而不是骨頭製成的？

And why do you always get a spot on the end of it

為什麼你總是能在最後得到一個點呢？

right before a job interview?

就在面試前？

Our lives would be very different

我們的生活會大不相同

if instead of noses we just had two wee holes on the front of our face.

如果我們沒有鼻子，只是在我們的臉上有兩個小洞。

I mean why do you think Voldemort was always so raging?

我的意思是，你覺得伏地魔為什麼總是這麼暴躁？

My life is terrible.

我的生活是可怕的。

Like loads of our external organs, noses evolved to help us eat

就像我們的外在器官一樣，鼻子也是為了幫助我們進食而進化的。

and therefore live.

並是以活。

Our nose is close to our mouth with downward pointing nostrils

我們的鼻子離嘴很近，鼻孔朝下

so even at the very last minute

所以，即使在最後一刻

we can smell if something has gone rotten.

我們可以聞到是否有東西已經腐爛了。

Noses even help us eat when we're too young to nip to the shops ourselves

鼻子甚至可以幫助我們吃飯，當我們還太年輕，不能自己去購物的時候。

by making sure we don't suffocate while being breastfed.

通過確保我們在母乳餵養時不會窒息。

That little air gap created by your nose pushing up against the breast

鼻子頂著乳房產生的那個小空隙。

coupled with the fact that the larynx sits much higher when you're a baby

再加上嬰兒時期喉頭的位置要高得多。

means that you can eat and breathe at the same time.

意味著你可以同時吃飯和呼吸。

The external nose is mainly made up of a springy cartilage

外鼻主要是由彈簧軟骨組成的

and it's a good job too.

而且這也是一個好工作。

They take quite a bit of a bashing throughout our lives

他們在我們的生活中受到了不少的打擊

so it makes a lot of sense that they're softer

所以，它們的柔軟是很有道理的。

and less likely to splinter and shatter.

且不易劈裂破碎。

While our jutting noses are in prime position to take a battering,

當我們的突起的鼻子處於承受打擊的首要位置時。

the position is also helpful for keeping rainwater or sweat

姿勢也有助於保持雨水或汗水

from flowing straight into our nostrils.

從直接流入我們的鼻孔。

Not all creatures are so design savvy.

並不是所有的生物都是那麼有設計感的。

The Myanmar snub-nosed monkey has an upward pointing nose

鼻孔猴

and is nicknamed the sneezing monkey

綽號 "打噴嚏的猴子

because every time it rains monkey goes atishoo!

因為每次下雨猴子都會去找阿提蘇!

Sounds cute, but when you're trying to live your best camouflaged life

聽起來很可愛，但當你想過你最好的偽裝生活時

a sneeze isn't the best way to stay concealed from predators.

打個噴嚏並不是躲避掠奪者的最好方法。

So your nose probably isn't as unfortunately shaped

所以你的鼻子可能沒有那麼不幸的形狀。

as the snub-nosed monkey,

作為鼻孔猴。

but what if you're not happy with it?

但如果你不滿意呢？

Rhinoplasty, or a nose job to the rest of us,

隆鼻，或者給我們其他人做隆鼻手術。

is the most common plastic surgery carried out anywhere

是各地最常見的整形手術

and it's nothing new.

而且這不是什麼新鮮事。

Rhinoplasty first became popular during the mass syphilis outbreak

隆鼻手術最早流行於大規模梅毒爆發期間。

in 16th Century Europe,

在16世紀的歐洲。

as one of the unfortunate symptoms of advanced syphilis

梅毒晚期的不幸症狀

is the loss of soft tissue and therefore your nose.

是失去了軟組織，是以你的鼻子。

A nose job then was as much fun as the disease.

那時的隆鼻和疾病一樣有趣。

Surgeons would cut a flap in the arm,

外科醫生會在手臂上切開一瓣。

attach it to where your nose once was

貼在鼻子上

and once it fuses with your face

一旦它與你的臉融合

sever your arm free and mould what's left

卸甲歸田

into something resembling a nose.

成類似鼻子的東西。

Now push the thought of arm flaps from your mind

現在，把你腦海中的臂瓣的念頭趕走。

and think instead about lovely, warm weather.

而不是想著可愛的，溫暖的天氣。

Our environment has influenced the way our noses evolve too.

我們的環境也影響了我們鼻子的進化方式。

In warmer climates there is less need to warm the air up

在溫暖的氣候下，不需要那麼多的暖氣。

on the way into the lungs

入肺

so the immediate flow of air straight into the lungs is preferable

是以，直接將空氣流入肺部是比較好的。

resulting in shorter, flatter noses.

導致鼻子更短、更扁平。

In colder climates, you're more likely to find long, thin noses

在寒冷的氣候下，你更容易發現長而薄的鼻子。

that are better at heating and humidifying cold air

在加熱和加溼冷空氣方面更勝一籌。

before it gets to the lungs.

在它進入肺部之前。

As well as being damned cute,

以及是該死的可愛。

dogs are said to have one of the best senses of smell going.

據說狗的嗅覺是最好的之一。

According to a recent study carried out in Florida,

根據最近在佛羅里達州進行的一項研究：

specially trained dogs had an almost 97% accuracy

訓練有素的狗的準確率幾乎達到97%。

in sniffing out cancer in blood samples.

在嗅出血液樣本中的癌症。

But our own sense of smell certainly isn't to be sniffed at -

但我們自己的嗅覺肯定是不能聞的--。

humans are better than dogs

人算不如天算

at identifying the smell of some ripe fruits

擅長識別一些成熟水果的氣味

simply because it's a more valuable trait to us.

只是因為這對我們來說是一個比較有價值的特質。

And if you wonder why the smell of ripe fruit takes you right back

如果你想知道為什麼成熟水果的味道會讓你回味無窮。

to your 2008 Benidorm weekender featuring too many mango daiquiris,

為你的2008年貝尼多姆周遊記中太多的芒果代基裡酒乾杯。

it's because of odour memory -

這是因為氣味的記憶 -

a rather unique ability that we possess

獨門絕技

because the part of our brain that deals with our sense of smell

因為我們大腦中處理我們嗅覺的部分。

is right next to the hippocampus, the area where memories are formed.

就在海馬體旁邊，記憶形成的區域。

Saving us from suffocation and salmonella,

使我們免於窒息和沙門氏菌的傷害。

sneezing and freezing,

打噴嚏，凍感冒。

it's safe to say we owe a whole lot

可以說，我們欠了很多東西

to our pointy, flat, wide, button, bumpy noses.

到我們尖尖的、扁扁的、寬寬的、扣扣的、凸凸的鼻子。

Even if it is where all the bogeys live.

哪怕是所有的禍害都住在這裡。