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I don't know anyone who wouldn't benefit from more self compassion.
It makes me nervous, it feels uncomfortable but I can see how it can be potentially life-changing.
Step #1 think of a situation in your life that is difficult
and causing you stress.
Okay. #2 Call the situation in mind and see if
you can actually feel the stress and emotional discomfort in your body.
Yeah I can definitely feel it in my neck and shoulders. I know that's where I carry a
lot of my anxiety. Okay. Step #3 Say to yourself this is a moment of suffering.
This acknowledgement is a form of mindfulness, of simply noticing what's
going on for you emotionally in the present moment without judging that
experience as good or bad. You can say to yourself, this hurts or this is stress.
Use whatever statement feels most natural to you.
So... this sucks. How many more days left of this do I have? So just saying this is
stress or this sucks and but that's okay. Those are statements that feel natural to me.
Step 4 Say to yourself, suffering is a part of
life. This is a recognition of your common humanity with others, that all
people have trying experiences and these experiences give you something in common
with the rest of humanity. Other options include: other people feel
this way, I'm not alone, or we all struggle in our lives.
I think the I'm not alone statement really resonates with me. I think that a
lot of other active-duty military psychiatrists probably have somewhat of
a similar sentiment. Just that knowledge that you're not alone it really really
helps. #5 - put your hands over your heart feel the warmth of your hands
and the gentle touch of your chest and say, May I be kind to myself
This is a way to express self-kindness. You can also consider whether there is
another specific phrase that would speak to you in that particular situation.
Examples include: May I give myself to compassion that I need. May I had learn to
accept myself as I am. May I forgive myself. May I be strong and may I be
patient. Oh may I learn to accept myself as I am. I think that really hits the
nail on the head. May I learn to accept myself as I am