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  • - What happen when you eat lactose?

  • - You don't want to know.

  • (woman giggling)

  • - Uncle Rodger bubble tea so good.

  • It's worth getting diarrhea for.

  • This video sponsored by Hello Fresh.

  • Niece and nephew,

  • Uncle Roger,

  • I hate grocery shopping,

  • takes so long and all grocery stores sell terrible food

  • like chili jam.

  • That's why I use Hello Fresh.

  • They send you all the ingredients,

  • perfect amount.

  • All you do is cook,

  • save so much time.

  • It's like having a little servant

  • go grocery shopping for you.

  • Their food is also so delicious.

  • For today's meal,

  • Uncle Roger got chicken laksa.

  • Laksa is the best Malaysian food,

  • the king of noodles.

  • Hello Fresh even have weekend options

  • for all the nieces and nephews

  • who don't know how to enjoy life.

  • They're also so good for the environment.

  • See the packaging,

  • all paper,

  • so recyclable.

  • So niece and nephew,

  • go to hellofresh.com and use my code

  • UNCLEROGER90 to get $90 off,

  • including free shipping on your first box for you.

  • $90,

  • that is so many egg fried rice.

  • Go to hellofresh.com right now,

  • and use the code UNCLEROGER90.

  • And now we start video.

  • Hello Niece and Nephew,

  • it's Uncle Roger.

  • Today,

  • Uncle Roger getting a new job,

  • because I keep getting fired from all my previous jobs.

  • Salad?

  • No salad here,

  • but we've got trees behind you,

  • go eat the leaf.

  • Don't know why.

  • This time,

  • Uncle Roger gonna work at this

  • bubble tea shop in Stockholm, Sweden.

  • This is my new boss Shuyu.

  • How long have you been working at Machi Machi?

  • - Soon one year.

  • - One year?

  • Only one year?

  • - Yes.

  • - And you are my boss?

  • - Because it's only here one year.

  • - They're not doing well,

  • that's why Uncle Roger's here to help them out.

  • Tell the viewer,

  • what is Machi Machi.

  • - Machi machi,

  • is a bubble tea shop run from Taiwan.

  • So we make different kinds of tea.

  • - So boss Shuyu,

  • what do you want me to do here today?

  • - So you need first serving the customers,

  • and then you should also help in the kitchen.

  • - Okay.

  • Uncle Roger can do that.

  • - You should not be yelling to the customers.

  • - No yelling?!

  • Cannot.

  • - And not to recommend them to add

  • the MSG into the bubble tea.

  • - MSG make your bubble tea better.

  • - No.

  • (Shuyu laughing)

  • (door creaking)

  • - So here we are cooking the tapioca pearls.

  • - Oh you cook pearl in here?

  • - Yeah.

  • - Oh you use induction stove.

  • - Yes.

  • - Why cannot afford real stove?

  • No fire.

  • Niece and Nephew,

  • if you enjoy bubble tea,

  • this is the behind the scene.

  • See?

  • So not glamorous.

  • Uncle Roger worked around the kitchen,

  • and I found the worst thing ever,

  • Machi Machi have colander.

  • Haiyaaaa

  • Boss Shuyu,

  • why you use colander?

  • What is this for?

  • Is it for drying rice?

  • - No.

  • So uncle Roger

  • We have real fire.

  • - Oh this is real fire!

  • - So you should know,

  • this is for burning the creme brulee.

  • - Oh,

  • you let Uncle Roger make bubble tea?

  • - Yes.

  • I think you're gonna regret this decision.

  • So we just burn the sugar.

  • - Yes,

  • you brown the sugar.

  • - This is so satisfying.

  • This is what my ex-wife Auntie Helen do to my heart.

  • (static glitching)

  • (soft music)

  • (dinging)

  • (soft talking)

  • Haiyaaa

  • Uncle Roger heard you.

  • Boss Shuyu,

  • we gonna put this away

  • because this is super annoying.

  • Hello?

  • How you doing?

  • - I'm very good.

  • How are you?

  • - I'm good.

  • What you want at Uncle Roger bubble tea shop?

  • - I've never had bubble tea so...

  • - You never had bubble tea?

  • - What do you recommend? - How old are you?

  • - 29.

  • - 29?

  • never have bubble tea?

  • How does it feel to live through 29 year of depression?

  • - What do you recommend?

  • - What I recommend?

  • Haiya, just look at menu.

  • That star behind the stuff,

  • - Yeah.

  • - that is what we recommend.

  • No need to ask Uncle Roger stupid question.

  • Haiya, Uncle Roger cashier,

  • not your personal bubble tea consultant.

  • I hope you enjoy,

  • come back soon.

  • What you want?

  • - I want a brown sugar milk bubble tea,

  • but do you have it without the lactose?

  • - What wrong with lactose?

  • I'm lactose intolerant.

  • - You're lactose-intolerant?

  • Why? Why you so weak?

  • So weak,

  • just milk you cannot handle.

  • What happen when you eat lactose?

  • - You don't want to know.

  • - I don't want to know.

  • (woman laughing)

  • - Uncle Roger's bubble tea is so good,

  • it's worth getting diarrhea for.

  • (woman laughing)

  • How are you doing?

  • - I'm good how are you?

  • - I'm okay.

  • What you want?

  • - I think a cappuccino maybe.

  • - Cappuccino?

  • Cappuccino

  • Do you know where you are?

  • This is bubble tea shop.

  • - Oh.

  • We don't serve cappuccino.

  • You may have dementia.

  • You think this is Starbucks?

  • If you want a cappuccino go to Starbucks,

  • go to Joe and the Juice.

  • - Okay fair enough.

  • - No don't leave.

  • Haiya why you take so long?

  • You take three minutes for one drink.

  • - We're high quality.

  • - High quality?

  • No, you just lazy.

  • Creme brulee milk tea coming up.

  • Do you want extra po in your milk tea?

  • - Maybe.

  • - Okay yes.

  • Maybe mean yes.

  • - Upselling is Uncle Roger's favorite activity.

  • You want to buy milk tea?

  • I sell you a car.

  • - Can I have a pekoe green tea?

  • Jasmine green tea with...

  • - You can't remember your order,

  • you have to look at menu.

  • Haiyaaa

  • Okay. What you want?

  • - A Pekoe jasmine green tea.

  • - Pekoe jasmine green tea?

  • So you can't memorize four word?

  • You have to look at the menu.

  • So sad.

  • Young people all bad memories,

  • so sad.

  • Pekoe green tea.

  • Sorry what do you want again?

  • Uncle Roger forgot also,

  • shit.

  • How much ice you want?

  • - No ice.

  • No ice,

  • so smart.

  • Asian people,

  • we get bubble tea,

  • we don't get ice,

  • then we get more of the bubble tea.

  • Take the bubble tea home with you

  • you put your own ice,

  • you get two cup

  • So smart.

  • Uncle Roger like, save money.

  • What do you want?

  • - I don't know.

  • I heard about this place actually.

  • Is this Jay Chou's bubble tea shop?

  • - Is this Jay Chou bubble tea shop?

  • Haiya, Jay Chou is super big super...

  • Hey look at me when I'm talking to you.

  • Jay Chou is big superstar,

  • he no time to serve you.

  • This is not Jay Chou bubble tea shop.

  • This is Uncle Roger bubble tea shop.

  • - So he's not here then?

  • - Jay Chou,

  • I know you don't own this place,

  • but you are Uncle Roger's favorite singer.

  • Fantasy,

  • my favorite album.

  • Niece and Nephew,

  • if you don't know Jay Chou,

  • he is big superstar global icon.

  • He's the Uncle Roger of music.

  • One benefit to working at bubble tea shop,

  • is Uncle Roger get my own free bubble tea.

  • This is the new product that is matcha creme brulee red bean.

  • Such a catchy name.

  • No wonder nobody ever order this,

  • name too long.

  • (soft upbeat music)

  • It's good.

  • Red bean is Uncle Roger favorite dessert.

  • This is the correct red paste,

  • not Jamie Oliver chili jam.

  • Next,

  • hello hello what do you want?

  • - I have a question.

  • Is it vegan bubble tea?

  • - Is bubble tea vegan?

  • - Boss Shuyu,

  • is bubble tea vegan?

  • - No actually but we can make it vegan.

  • - Don't make it vegan.

  • You're spoiling them

  • You're sure you don't want Uncle Roger matcha red bean

  • long ass name milk tea?

  • - Can you make it vegan?

  • - Is this vegan?

  • - No.

  • - Oh yes we can.

  • This is the most vegan milk tea ever.

  • - I think I'll listen to the boss.

  • - Okay customer always right.

  • Uncle Roger only giving this to you

  • because I don't want to be fired.

  • - I feel special.

  • - You make Uncle Roger feel special also.

  • ♪ You make me feel special ♪

  • You sure you don't want Uncle Roger matcha red bean tea?

  • - Okay I'll have that one.

  • - You gonna have this?

  • Okay okay great.

  • Boss Shuyu you see?

  • I not only upsell him,

  • I turn him into non vegan.

  • How are you doing?

  • - I'm good.

  • Do you have any lunch special suggestions for me?

  • - There's one shop down there

  • that serves very good egg fried rice.

  • I don't like fried rice.

  • - You don't like egg fried rice?

  • - I don't like rice.

  • - You don't like rice?

  • Haiya, Uncle Roger don't like you.

  • I think somebody need haircut.

  • Sweden,

  • not even in lockdown,

  • you can't go to barber shop?

  • Haiiyaaa

  • What is this?

  • You have mop on your head.

  • - I let my friend cut it.

  • - You let your friend cut it?

  • You need to stop being friend with him.

  • I think he want to make your uglier.

  • Oh is this what you want?

  • - Yes.

  • This is what Uncle Roger have.

  • But look at this,

  • the design so terrible.

  • We just took one photo and put three words on there.

  • No wonder nobody order this.

  • This look so bad.

  • The text not even the same color.

  • See this one back here?

  • This one,

  • they got professional to design.

  • You can tell difference,

  • this one by professional.

  • This one by my Boss Shuyu.

  • - Can I get it gluten free?

  • - Gluten-free?

  • Is bubble tea gluten-free?

  • - Yes.

  • - You sure?

  • - Yes.

  • - Okay everything gluten free.

  • Don't worry.

  • Even weak people can enjoy.

  • - Oh hello,

  • how are you doing?

  • So what you want here today?

  • - Actually yesterday I was here.

  • It was really bad.

  • - Really bad?

  • Yeah it didn't taste good.

  • - Because Uncle Roger not working yesterday.

  • You came in wrong day.

  • It's your own fault.

  • What you want to complain about?

  • Was the taste bad?

  • What else?

  • - I don't know.

  • It didn't taste enough.

  • Like no taste.

  • - No taste.

  • - I think you got COVID.

  • You can't taste anything anymore.

  • So yesterday the bubble tea don't taste good

  • because they forgot the most important ingredient.

  • The king of flavor MSG.

  • If you don't like this,

  • I give you your money back.

  • Okay try try

  • Haiya, take your face mask off first.

  • Haiiiyaaa

  • - It tastes really good.

  • - Yes.

  • See.

  • Machi-machi people,

  • you need a new item on your menu.

  • You need MSG creme brulee matcha red bean bubble tea.

  • So catchy this name.

  • Oh hello hello

  • - Hi.

  • - How are you doing?

  • - I'm doing pretty well.

  • - This guy dress like Kim Jong-Un.

  • This suit,

  • where you get that,

  • the North Korean shop?

  • What you want?

  • - I want to have the matcha milk tea please.

  • Matcha milk tea,

  • good choice.

  • How much sugar?

  • - Without sugar please.

  • - No sugar,

  • are you sure?

  • - Yeah.

  • - Matcha very bitter.

  • - The bitter the better.

  • - The bitter the better?

  • You have sad life.

  • What wrong with you?

  • Why you like bitter?

  • Who hurt you?

  • - Do you serve alcohol here?

  • - Alcohol?

  • - Yes.

  • - In bubble tea?

  • - Yes.

  • - That is good idea.

  • Boss Shuyu,

  • do we serve alcohol here at Machi Machi?

  • - No we don't have a license.

  • - No.

  • You don't need license.

  • Uncle Roger bought my own stash.

  • (laughing)

  • Oh this guy look at your shirt.

  • Oh my god.

  • - Hey how are you doing?

  • Good.

  • - I watch Uncle Roger Tiktok.

  • - Oh Tiktok.

  • - Yes Tiktok.

  • - I don't know why I'm big on Tiktok.

  • Tiktok full of underage girl dancing.

  • That is not Uncle Roger vibe,

  • I'm not pedo.

  • What about you?

  • You're wearing a shirt like that.

  • I think you are pedo.

  • Are you a pedo?

  • - No I turned 18 last week.

  • - Oh,

  • you turned 18 last week.

  • You cannot sleep with under age girl anymore,

  • you go to jail now.

  • You're 18 year old,

  • but you're dressed like 50 year old man

  • going on Safari.

  • Creme brulee okay,

  • no problem.

  • So you're buying Christmas gifts.

  • Show me.

  • - I bought a video game for my friend.

  • - Oh,

  • this is the best videogame ever.

  • It's Caravan Man Flipping Omelette.

  • Oh my God.

  • Thank you nephew.

  • Oh,

  • you're from Singapore?

  • - Yeah.

  • - Oh Malaysia's worst enemy.

  • - Now you see,

  • I born in Malaysia.

  • - You born in Malaysia,

  • and then you defected to worst country.

  • Asian people grow up in Asia.

  • The work ethic very good.

  • - Of course.

  • They come to Sweden,

  • everybody so lazy.

  • Haiiyaaa

  • The shops here all close at 4:30.

  • - It's my first time trying boba so...

  • - Oh it's your first time trying boba.

  • - I want to go basic.

  • - First time drinking bubble tea,

  • go with the classic.

  • Milk tea with tapioca,

  • otherwise you're fucked up.

  • First time drinking bubble tea

  • is like first time having sex.

  • You might not enjoy it at first,

  • but you drink it a few more times.

  • A ball go into your throat,

  • you don't know what to do with it,

  • but you drink it a few times and you start to enjoy it.

  • Brown sugar milk tea okay okay,

  • with tapioca.

  • - Yes please.

  • - And you?

  • - Same here.

  • Same.

  • Oh my God.

  • Classic couple.

  • I hope you get nice children one day.

  • - I will show them Uncle Roger videos from birth.

  • - Yes.

  • That's what you need to do.

  • Many parent put music for music

  • for their children to get smarter.

  • - I'd put Uncle Roger.

  • - And put MSG on your baby also.

  • Be better baby,

  • smarter.

  • Okay.

  • Niece and Nephew.

  • Here you go.

  • Couple who drink bubble tea together will stay together.

  • Hello.

  • Orange hoodie!

  • - Orange peaked.

  • - So nice.

  • Very nice you have good taste.

  • - You too.

  • I love it.

  • - Okay.

  • What do you want today?

  • - Could I get like a strawberry milk?

  • Along with panna cotta?

  • - Strawberry milk with panna cotta.

  • Okay no problem.

  • How much sugar?

  • - A lot of sugar.

  • - Just sugar.

  • Haiiyaaa

  • This girl like bubble tea and diabetes also.

  • Your life revolve around sugar.

  • Are you also looking for a sugar daddy?

  • - I have two.

  • - You have two?

  • - Yeah and maybe a third one.

  • - Oh!

  • - You want to join?

  • No Uncle Roger too poor.

  • I spend money on MSG.

  • I don't spend money on woman.

  • - That's a good choice actually.

  • MSG better than woman.

  • MSG don't pack up and leave.

  • Why do you want a sugar daddy?

  • Why can't you go get a job and get your own money?

  • - Why should I get a job when I'm wearing orange and yellow?

  • Why?

  • - Why that is not a reason.

  • - It's good taste!

  • Beautiful woman,

  • don't have to work.

  • - Good taste correct.

  • Beautiful I don't know.

  • - Wow.

  • (sighing)

  • Uncle Roger work all day today.

  • So tired now.

  • I served so many customers.

  • Bring you so much business.

  • How did I do?

  • What you think?

  • - I think you did a good job.

  • - Oh thank you.

  • Maybe not a hundred percent.

  • - What?

  • I was so nice to everyone.

  • What you mean?

  • You should not be like selling the alcohol to them.

  • - But they ask for alcohol,

  • and you say customer always right?

  • We have to listen to customer.

  • But it's a bubble tea shop here.

  • - What else can I improve?

  • - The upselling maybe.

  • - But upselling is good.

  • - You should not upsell the milk to the vegan people.

  • - Okay.

  • - Is there anything I did correct?

  • - You were insulting fewer people.

  • - Oh yes Uncle Roger didn't insult that many customers.

  • I insult my Boss Shuyu the most.

  • Because if you don't remember,

  • he poster is so shit.

  • Haiiiyaaa

  • Niece and Nephew.

  • Thank you so much for watching.

  • Subscribe to Uncle Roger channel,

  • and smack like button.

  • Like how you smack a bag of rice.

  • See you next week.

  • Bye bye.

  • - This is annoying actually.

  • - Can we remove this?

  • Yeah.

  • - Oh sorry.

  • (laughing)

  • Wait one second let me chew.

  • (laughing)

  • It's so awkward when people watch you chew.

  • Guess what?

  • My boss Shuyu is crushing the ice again.

  • (exclaiming)

  • I think Machi Machi

  • have the loudest ice crusher in the world.

  • You turn it on and it's...

  • (makes buzzing sounds)

  • (laughing)

  • Did you design this?

  • - Yeah.

  • (laughing)

  • You actually designed this!

  • (laughing)

  • I didn't know Kim Jong-Un drank bubble tea.

  • - Now you know.

  • I'm going to be mean to everybody

  • so please don't get offended yeah.

  • Oh wait you have to pay.

  • I forgot to take your payment.

  • Please come back.

  • (laughing)

  • Yeah you.

  • MSG make food better.

  • A woman just eat your food and leave.

  • Okay.

  • Last customer of the day for Uncle Roger.

  • - No way.

  • So lucky.

  • I feel blessed.

  • - No problem.

  • You guys better be funny,

  • otherwise...

  • So much passion.

  • Now you know how I feel all the time.

- What happen when you eat lactose?

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