Your call is very important to us.

Please hold.

Yeah right if it were important I wouldn't have been put on hold for over an hour and hey hi I'd like to cancel my, please listen to the following options.

To sign up for a subscription.

Press one to listen to me.

Motorboat for 45 minutes press two.

I'm sorry what for all other inquiries press 11.

Okay then You have pressed one twice.

You are now signed up for two additional subscriptions.

What the heck is going on to add even more subscriptions.

Press one to cancel your subscription.

Press 111.

Hey I'm on to you know way speak to associate transferring you now this is orange.

Hi I want to cancel my subscription.

Which one?

It says here you have three.

That's a mistake.

Oh well then I'll transfer you to the mistake department.

Please hold click mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mm mistake department.

Orange speaking.

Hey you kind of sound like the last guy really.

His voice sounds this fantastic.

La la la la la la la la la whatever.

Listen I want to cancel all of my subscriptions.

I wanna be done with your company forever and never have to call here again as long as I live.

Do you understand?

Absolutely.

But first would you like to take our survey?

Shouldn't that be at the end on a scale of 1 to 10.

How satisfied were you with your wait time one out of 10.

It was horrible one.

Oh you gotta press it on your phone.

Okay?

You have pressed one.

You are now signed up for an additional subscription.

Excuse me sir shouting will do you no good because I can shout way louder than you can see what is happening.

Stop, stop, stop it.

I want to speak to your manager.

Please.

Hold click.

Oh yes.

Oh my.

Oh my God.

This is this is infuriating.

Wait, are you are you just humming?

Hold music?

No way.

Yes you are.

I know it don't you know soothing music when you hear it.

La la la la la la la la la la.

This is the last thing I need right now.

Dude manager speaking.

Hello?

Wait wait, you're not the manager.

You're that same annoying guy from earlier.

Our manager quit.

I guess he thought I was too hilarious or something.

Would you like to take the survey?

No, I want to cancel my subscription.

Oh that's easy.

You can do that on our automated system.

I already tried that.

Oh I see you're technologically illiterate.

I am not.

Your system is buggy.

Tell it to the I.

T.

Department click mm hmm.

This song is awful by the way.

Like seriously the worst.

Hey, that's rude.

I mean I.

T.

Department finally another voice just kidding.

It's me doing an impression of the guy who used to work it.

He quit after my office pranks.

Got too hilarious.

Is there anyone else working at your company?

Nope?

Whoopee cushion Wednesday picked off the last couple stragglers.

Oh my God look, can you help me or not?

Ok, ok.

Keep your pants on.

All right, let's see here.

Oh yeah.

You're the guy who wanted to add another subscription, correct?

No, boom.

I added one plus an extra subscription just because you've been so patient.

Mhm.

Sir.

Sir, are you there?

Should I transfer you to the broken phone department?

Just tell me how to cancel my subscription.

Oh, cancel, jeez Why didn't you just say so?

That's easy.

Just press 111.

No, I will not press 111.

That will add three more subscriptions to my account only.

If you press the one button three times.

How else would I press?

111 By pressing the 111 button.

Obviously my phone doesn't have a 111 button.

We'll probably not anymore.

Now that you smashed it.

This is why I wanted to transfer you to the broken phone department.

Ah Can I help you with anything else?

Would you like to take our survey?

No.

So on a scale of 1 to 10, your interest in taking the survey would be a one.

Yes.

Okay, let me just type that response into the computer and an additional subscription has been automatically added to your order.

Ah You appear to have smashed your forehead into the one button.