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- This looks like the wet rice I made with a colander - No, no, this is not wet rice.
這就像那些我用濾網做的濕濕的飯
- It looks amazing!
-這才不是濕濕的飯
- This is properly made rice just with more water.
-看起來很棒!
Previously Uncle Roger bring Auntie Hersha to Chinatown.
這只是用多一點的水將米正確地煮好
- Do you smack kid?
前情提要, Roger叔叔帶著Hersha阿姨來到了唐人街
- No, we didn't smack kid.
你們印度人會修理小孩嗎
- That's why you turn out like this.
不,我們不會打小孩
- I think I am PANsexual. [touches wok]
這就是為什麼你長歪了
- That is not a cupcake.
我想我是「鍋性戀」
- This is Chinese cupcake.
-這應該不是杯子蛋糕吧 -這是中式杯子蛋糕
- Now back to part two of video, we go to Chinese restaurant.
現在回到PART 2 影片 我們來到中式餐廳
- So, Auntie Hersha
那Hersha阿姨
- You eat everything right? - I'm like 97.4% vegan.
你什麼東西都吃吧?
- Haiya...vegan...
我大概是97.4%的素食主義者
- Vegan don't know how to enjoy life, how you come to Chinese restaurant be vegan? What you eat?
Haiyaa,素食主義者 素食主義者不知道怎麼享受生活
- What you eat? The peanut? - Because this is a cultural exchange
你要怎麼在中式餐廳裡吃素
- I'm going to use my 3% of being non-vegan.
你要吃什麼?花生?
- Okay. - So go wild Uncle Rog!
因為這是一個文化交流
- Auntie Hersha giving up her morals for YouTube video.
我可以用我那不是素食主義者的3%
- Uncle Roger like. Moral is useless, YouTube video, very useful!
-OK喔~
- Chicken feet, duck tongue, pig ear, all serve cold, what you think?
所以放馬過來吧,Roger叔叔
- WhaT YOu ThINk?
Hersha阿姨為了Youtube影片放棄了道德準則
- Just order what you'd usually get.
這個Roger叔叔喜歡
- Okay. Challenge accepted. - Oh, uh, do you have anything vegan?
道德準則?沒有屁用啦 Youtube影片,讚d(`・∀・)b
- oNE tHiNg
雞爪、鴨舌、豬耳朵,都是冷盤
- Vegan at dim sum can only get one dish.
-你怎麼想? -((((((゚Д゚;))))))
- So sad.
你就點你常點的
A FEW MOMENTS LATER
OK,接受挑戰
- It loo- it looks like raw plastic.
喔,你們有任何素食的東西嗎?
- No, it not raw plastic. This is chicken feet how you can call chicken feet raw plastic?
一個就好……
- Don't think. - It doesn't really smell of anything.
點素食點心的下場,你只會拿到一個東西
- Just wang in mouth.
淒淒慘慘戚戚
- Is there any kind of dipping sauce? - No dipping sauce.
(片刻後)
- You eat like this. You eat dog penis, but you scare chicken feet?
這看起來像一堆塑膠
- What is this logic? - Okay, what's this one?
才不是咧,你怎麼說是塑膠,這是一盤雞爪
- This is duck tongue.
你怎麼可以把雞爪看成塑膠
- This is also cold. - Do you know duc-
-我覺得他們很像啊 -別想了,把它「打」進嘴裡吃就對了
- Offal is very fashionable.
-他沒有沾醬之類的嗎? -沒有沾醬,直接吃
- Offal? What is offal?
你吃那個像狗GG的東西,但是怕雞爪?
- Well it is offal, the tongue
什麼鬼邏輯?
- Like offal is little bits of meat that people don't usually want to eat
那這又是什麼?
- HIIIIIIIIIIIIIYAAAAAAAA
這是鴨舌
- We call duck tongue but you call offal.
這個也是冷的?
- So hard to understand. We call it what it is but you call offal.
你知道鴨嗎?
- Nobody know what is offal.
-“內臟”是很時髦的 -“內臟”?
- Uncle Roger put duck tongue on my tongue.
-什麼是“內臟”?
- MmmmmMmMMmMMMMMmmm.
-就是那些一般人不會煮來吃的部分
- It's alright.
Haiyaa~~~~
- Once i've got past the fact that it's a tongue.
我們叫鴨舌,但你們說是內臟
- Auntie Hersha, this is Uncle Roger fAVVoURite dish of all time.
好難理解,它是什麼部位,我們就怎麼叫它
- Crispy pork.
但你們說這是“內臟” 沒有人知道什麼是“內臟”啦
- Best food in the world. If you die and go to heaven it is first meal they serve for you.
Roger叔叔把鴨舌頭放到我的舌頭上
- Yeah, but pigs are very smart animals. So I wouldn't want that.
((舔舔舔舔舔(花京院吃櫻桃
- Smart animal can still be tasty. So smart, so tasty.
其實還行,只要我接受了它是舌頭的事實
- Oh Auntie Hersha, that is your vegan dumpling.
Hersha阿姨,這道是Roger叔叔最愛的一道菜
- In Chinese restaurant, vegan food, they very condescending.
脆皮燒肉,世界上最好的食物
- They make it green to tell you. This is vegan food. Look at this-
如果你死後上了天堂,這就是天堂上的第一道菜
- Let's shame this vegan over here make it green. So the whole shop know you vegan.
是啦,但是豬是很聰明的動物,所以我不想要吃它
- Well, I'm used to shame, so I'll take my shame.
聰明的動物也可以很好吃
- And eat that. Yeah, no. The dumplings are really good, but I just don't feel that satisfied.
好聰明,好好吃
- That's why Uncle Roger got you this also. This is congee.
嗯~~~~~(✧≖‿ゝ≖)
- Very satisfying. Best food.
喔,Hersha阿姨,那是你的素餃子
- Every time Uncle Roger sick, my mom make this for me. Very nice.
在中式餐廳裡,素菜都很高調的
- This looks like the wet rice I made with the colander. - No, No. This is not wet rice-
他們把它做成綠色的,來告訴大家這是素食
- It look- it looks amaaaaazing!
「來看啊,大家一起來羞辱這個素食主義者。」
- This is properly made rice just with more water. - Wet rice.
讓整間店都知道你是素食主義者。
- They don't run this to colander.
我習慣被羞辱了,所以我會接受它,
- No, no, no. Don't use the word wet.
然後吃它
- Uncle Roger hear the word wet is the Uncle Roger hear the word moist. Very disgusting now.
那些餃子很棒,但我還沒吃飽
- Finally, he gets me.
所以Roger叔叔也幫你點了這個
- Hiya, she don't get me at all. In Asia if you sick, your mom make this for you.
這是粥,可以吃很飽,最好的食物
- In western country, if you sick, your mom give you medicine and throw you out.
每次Roger叔叔生病了,我媽都煮這個給我吃,很好吃
- Well, that's nice. I can see why you'd have it when you're ill, it's just kind of like really light.
這就像我用濾網做的濕濕的飯
- Dim sum is best version of brunch.
Σ(*゚д゚ノ)ノ
- Brunch? - Yeah, Chinese people doing dim sum for brunch since 1845.
-這才不是濕濕的飯 -它看起來很棒!
- But did they do avo on toast?
這只是用多一點的水將米正確地煮好
- Avoca- What is avocado? Oh my God...
-濕濕的飯~ -他們沒有用濾網做這個,不不不
- Just give me one sec.
不要用「濕」這個字
- Where is that? Looking for... just got my oat milk.
Roger叔叔聽到濕這個字,就會聯想到潮濕、濕濕的
- Coffee.
很噁心
- Oh, look!
終於,他了解我
- Everywhere I go, avocado.
Haiyaa~~~ 她根本不了解我
- Don't bring avocado to Chinese restaurant.
在亞洲,如果你病了,你媽會煮這個給你吃
- Oh my God. This is insult to Chinese culture. Chinese people, we don't eat avocado.
在西方國家,如果你病了 你媽會給你藥然後把你丟出去
- Dumpling better for your soul.
它很好吃,我知道為什麼你要生病的時候吃
- MMMMmmmMMMmMMmmmmm.
它很沒有負擔
- This is fish Uncle Roger gonna eat later.
中式點心是最讚的早午餐選擇
- 下次見 (See you next time.)
-早午餐?
- What are you doing? - Nothing, I was just um asking... Nothing
對啊,中國人從1845年開始就把點心當早午餐在吃了。
- Oh, look! Acupuncture. - Oh acupuncture. Yeah. Yeah. Auntie Hersha know acupuncture.
那他們吃酪梨醬土司嗎?
- Yeah, I love it!
酪梨---酪梨醬到底是三小啦!(╬゚д゚)
- Ohhhhhh, me too! - I can't imagine you'd like it.
這個呀!
- You like it?
等我一下哈!
- YEAH.
到底放哪去了...我找找
- That's like alternate therapy, that's like hippie world, isn't it?
我剛剛買的燕麥...
- No, no. It's Chinese therapy.
咖啡...
- Always good. Chinese therapy always better than western therapy.
喔!找到了!
- Auntie Hersha, this hand waving cat bring you good luck.
我不管到哪裡都會帶著酪梨
- This year you had so bad, this year, so you should buy a cat.
不要把酪梨帶到中式餐廳裡來好嗎
- I think you should buy me a good luck cat.
我的天啊,這是對中華文化的一種污辱!
- Fine. Uncle Roger cause Auntie Hersha a lot of pain, so...
我們中華人才不吃什麼酪梨咧!(╬゚д゚)
- Next, Uncle Roger go get favourite drink bubble tea.
多吃水餃,有益靈魂健康
- Well, this is a very trendy place.
Roger叔叔等一下就是要吃這條魚
- Yes, Uncle Roger bring Auntie Hersha to bubble tea shop.
下次見
- Auntie Hersha, Uncle Roger gonna get you this bubble tea. What you think?
-你在幹嘛? -沒啊,我只是在問問...沒事!
- What you think?
你看~
- I think, I want the gold one with the rose, brown rose/ flower thing.
針灸治療診所欸
- oOOoOHHHHH.
喔~針灸,對對對
- Auntie Hersha. High roller.
Hersha阿姨居然知道針灸?
- The dairy is probably gonna make me feel sick, but I'm gonna suffer for the art.
對啊!我愛死了!(*´∀`)~♥
- It just tells your fortune. - Oh my God. I love it!
-我也是(*´∀`)~♥ -針灸其實很...你喜歡?
- No obstacle will stop you from being successful in love.
對啊!Roger叔叔...
- That is correct. Uncle Roger have Auntie Jenny now. - But i'm getting in the way apparently.
但這其實是老派的醫療法,就像七零年代的嬉皮文化,不是嗎?
- But I'm not. - Hiiiiyaa.
才不是咧,是中式治療法!-`д´-
- First you ruin rice. Now, you ruin my love life.
永遠讚!(ゝ∀・)b
- This is a lot of plastic. - Oh, plastic is Asian people favourite thing.
中式治療法永遠比西方療法還要好σ`∀´)σ
- Killing sea turtle is our hobby.
Hersha阿姨,這尊招財貓會給你招來好運
- Look how hipster this looks it looks so cool and trendy, doesn't it?
你今年過得太糟糕了
-Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's better than Starbucks.
所以你應該要買一尊回去擺著
- Starbucks? I don't do so much. - But you so white you don't do Starbucks?
我覺得是你該買給我才對
- NOOOO. - ooOHHHH.
好啦,畢竟Roger叔叔我就是讓Hersha阿姨遭到網路霸凌的罪魁禍首
- I'm a hipster.
接下來,Roger叔叔要來去喝我最愛的飲料,珍珠奶茶
- You see ball under, under your cup. - They're really small, those balls.
這地方很紅啊
- Oh, is that what you like?
Roger叔叔帶Hersha阿姨來到珍奶店
- No, I don't like small balls. - So Auntie Hersha only like big ball in mouth?
Hersha阿姨,Roger叔叔幫你點...
- OOOOHHHHHH.
這個,你覺得怎麼樣?怎麼樣?ε(*´・∀・`)з゙
- I'm gonna eat some tiny balls now.
我覺得...
- Did you get the ball? - I got- I got two balls
我要點金牌的這個
- Two ball is perfect number of ball. - It's nice.
玫瑰黑糖這個
- Is it better than kombucha?
喔~~~ε(*´・∀・`)з゙
- No, I prefer kombucha.
Hersha阿姨懂吃喔~
- Um, I like the kind of burnt caramel taste.
飲料裡面奶的部分可能會讓我不舒服,但...
- But I really hate milk.
我願意為藝術獻身
- ooooooohhh.
這個是幫你算籤運的
- Are you one of those lactose intolerant people? - I- I actually am.
喔買尬,我愛這個(*´∀`)~♥
- Oh no. - I know.
你的戀情將順風順水
- You will get diarrhoea soon.
這個很準喔,Roger叔叔現在有Jenny阿姨了
- I think i'm probably gonna get diarrhoea soon. - All the balls coming up.
但我可能阻擋到你們的發展摟(*ˇωˇ*人)
- If they did it with Oatly oat milk, then I'd really love it.
Haiyaaaaa
- I'd have it all the time.
你先是毀了米飯,現在你要來毀了我的愛情
- Okay, so you're gonna make oat milk bubble tea. Hiiiiiyaaaaa.
這也太多塑膠了吧
- So white, so white!
塑膠產品是亞洲人的最愛
- So Auntie Hersha, we spent all day in Chinatown today. What you think? What you think?
害死海龜是我們的興趣(他是開玩笑的(´・_・`)
- Um, I'm really impressed with my massive stick.
你看看這包裝多潮啊,
- Cinnamon sticks.
你說這包裝是不是很酷?
- After Auntie Hersha have the ball in her drink,
對對對
- Now she very sexual.
比星巴克好多了
- Hit like and subscribe to my channel and also go subscribe to Auntie Hersha channel.
星巴克????
- Hersha Patel!
我不喝星巴克的
- In next video Auntie Hersha gonna show Uncle Roger her culture.
你這麼白人結果你居然不喝星巴克?
- Where are you gonna bring me?
我才不喝咧
- I'm gonna take you to east London, where I live.
喔~~~~(ㆆᴗㆆ)
- Where you are just gonna be... surprised.
我很潮的
- You're gonna have a great time. I'm gonna show you all my favourite places.
你有看到杯子底下的珍珠嗎
- We're gonna maybe do some yoga, meditation.
那些珍珠真的好小喔
- Have some avocado.
所以你喜歡小小的珍珠嗎
- Maybe... I don't know, some sourdough?
-沒欸,我不喜歡小珍珠(蛋蛋
- Kombucha!
所以Hersha阿姨喜歡吃大的珍珠(蛋蛋)?( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡ °)
- Auntie hersha are gonna try to turn Uncle Roger into white people.
我要來吃這些小珍珠了
- No, no, no, very sad.
-你有吃到珍珠嗎? -有,我有吃到兩顆
- Niece and nephew, see you in my next video!
兩顆是最完美的數字(還是在開黃腔
- Bye bye!
很好吃欸
- 谢谢大家 (Thank you everyone.)
有比你的紅茶菌好喝嗎?
- Oh, Auntie Hersha I can speak Mandarin? Oh my God.
不,我還是喜歡我的紅茶菌
- Chinese people, we drink tea because tea is good.
∑( ̄□ ̄;)
- But Auntie Hersha drink tea because Oh! It's so healthy for you~
我喜歡焦糖那種焦焦的味道
- Oh my God, it's so healthy for you~
但我真的真的不喜歡牛奶
- Need more MSG.
喔~~~
- Did you like the second one? - Yeah, cause you didn't use the colander.
-所以你有乳糖不耐症? -嗯對
- Yes! And the fried rice lady. Yes.
-喔不~~~ -嗯哼
- Of course, of course, of course. Yeah.
你很快就會ㄘㄨㄚˋ賽了
- Oh, it's Uncle Roger. Making fried rice properly. Hiyaaaa.
-對我覺得我可能很快肚子就會痛了 -那些珍珠都被你拉出來
- Thank you. Bye bye.
如果他們用燕麥奶