Today, I wanted to make a video for those of you who are in your twenties. 

Maybe you're feeling lost, you don't have a direction in life,

or you're just not feeling the most on point.

These are things that I wish I knew when I was in my twenties.

I am 31, now. I know, I know.

I don't feel like it though. I feel like I'm still 26, maybe.

But anyway, I'm very excited to share some pieces of advice for you,

whether you're in your twenties or any age.

But we are here to learn how we can understand ourselves,

tap into our fullest potential, and create the life of our dreams.

Without further ado, let's get into the tips.

First things first, nobody knows what they're doing.

It's okay to feel lost. It's okay to not have everything figured out.

In fact, it's normal.

So don't feel like you are the only one that's going through this,

or that you have to have things figured out right away,

you have to have a plan.

I know when you've been in school all your life,

you're used to having rules.

You're used to having a syllabus like,

“This is what you're doing.

This is your homework. We're learning this lesson this week.”

Life is not like that. Life is not that clear cut.

And nobody's giving you a step-by-step guidebook on how to live life.

And that could be a scary thing, or it can be a beautiful thing.

Think of this as a beautiful opportunity to figure out who you are,

what you want out of life,

and start to put the first baby steps in motion.

This is your time to explore, try new things,

and even make mistakes and be okay with that process.

I understand that this is much easier said than done.

And thinking back to how I felt when I was 20 and 21, 

I just could not be okay with not having things figured out,

like physically it was hurting me.

I was going through depression.

It was all that pressure that I had to succeed and all –

so many mental health related issues.

And so, I'm just saying that I understand what you're going through.

I feel you, and if you feel like it's too dark in your mind

and you need some support,

then definitely reach out to your loved ones

and you can even consider therapy.

At this point, I wanna thank BetterHelp for sponsoring today's video,

a very fitting sponsor for this topic and this era in your life,

because it's not easy going through your twenties

and feeling lost and dealing with the pressure from your parents or society.

BetterHelp is professional counseling done securely online.

BetterHelp will assess your needs and match you  with your own licensed professional therapist.

There's a broad range of expertise in BetterHelp's counselor network,

which may or may not be locally available in many areas, so it's very accessible.

Their service is available for clients worldwide.

The way it works is: You can log in anytime and message your counselor,

or you can also schedule phone or video calls as well.

I prefer phone calls because I don't like to show my face,

but I know a lot of people love video calls with their therapist.

BetterHelp also makes it easy and free to change counselors if you don't like yours

and you can cancel anytime if you don't like it.

It's more affordable than traditional therapy and financial aid is also available.

So if you're interested in trying out BetterHelp,

you can go to my link at betterhelp.com/aileen to get 10% off your first month.

I'll leave the link down below as well.

Lesson #2: Take your biggest risks while you're young.

This is hands-down one of the best pieces of advice I actually got in college,

because when you are young,

you don't have much to lose.

You don't have a mortgage or kids to take care of.

You don't have many obligations or responsibilities outside of maybe paying student loans.

But for the most part, you're pretty carefree,

and so it's easier to take risks because you have less to lose.

It's also good because when you are young,

you have so much time, so much life ahead of you that,

even if you take a risk and you fail,

you have plenty of time to pick yourself back up.

And the reason why I encourage taking risks in the first place is

because higher risks usually equals high reward.

But there's also chance of failure.

Any age, it's okay to fail, but when you're young,

it's easier to fail because like I mentioned, you don't have much to lose.

So in your twenties you should actually  aim to make mistakes and aim to fail.

Don't be afraid of failure,

because it really is part of the process of learning and growing.

Tip #3 is to: Think long term and have a big picture goal.

I think it's so, so important to have at least an idea

of where you wanna be in the big picture

and the larger scheme things,

because I've seen people not have a big picture goal.

They kind of live life taking things step by step.

They go with the flow,

and although that can lead you to some great opportunities,

sometimes it leads you to get stuck

and living life for a few years,

not knowing where you're actually going, not going anywhere,

you know, just staying in the same place.

And then maybe five, ten years later, you're like,

“What the heck am I doing? This is not the life I wanted to live.”

And that's how midlife crises start.

So don't be afraid to dream big

and lay out your vision of your ideal life,

because if you have that vision,

then you can use as your compass.

With every opportunity or every step that you take,

you can ask, “Okay, does this seem related?

Is this even going in the right direction of  my big picture goal or dream life vision?”

You don't actually need to know the exact steps

that you have to take to get to that big picture goal.

It's almost impossible to know all the little steps that you have to take

because it's so far away,

but all you need is a north star.

You need to have a dream.

You need to have that goal so that it can guide you along as you make choices in life.

There will be times where it'll be hard

when you have to make a decision between

short-term certainty and safety

vs. following your long-term goal.

Sometimes they don't get along.

A lot of people, if they don't have a long-term goal, 

they just keep making life choices based on what feels safe or certain, 

or convenient at the time for the short term. 

So they're making short-term choices and then year after year, 

eventually they realize they're nowhere where they wanted to be, 

because they ignored having that clear vision, having that goal, 

and taking the steps that you need to take in order to get close to that goal. 

Tip #4 is to realize that:

Nobody cares about you as much as you think they do.

And as sad as it sounds, it's also incredibly freeing,

because it means that you are actually more free to

do what you want and to be who you are,

instead of caring about other people's opinions and judgments. 

The truth is: People are always going to have an opinion. 

There will always be people who criticize you and judge you 

based on their perspective in life and what they value. 

But it doesn't mean you have to listen to

what they say or try to live abiding by their rules.

And I'm talking about your parents included.

I know it can be very hard because your parents are always so –

they have their opinions on what you should do and everything.

But the reality is you are the one who's living your life, you know. 

Nobody else is living your life for you. 

People can give you their opinions  and their judgment all they want, 

but it's up to you, whether you are going to absorb that 

or if you're going to protect yourself from that, keep a healthy boundary, 

and just live how you want to live.

The truth is: People spend most of their time

thinking about themselves instead of thinking about you.

You might cross their mind for a minute or something,

but after that, they'll forget about you.

And then they'll go back to thinking about themselves.

So instead of giving so much power

to other people's thoughts, opinions, and judgments,

realize that they don't care.

They don't care about you, so you should do what you want.

Comment down below what you would do

if you stopped caring about what other people thought of you.

What would change about yourself or your life?

Would you change the way you dress? Would you change your career?

What would you do?

How would you live if it really didn't matter what people thought of you?

#5, this is a big one, is to:

Recognize and release your need for external validation.

This is something that I wish I knew when I was in my twenties,

because I wasn't even aware of this.

I just operated how I did,

but I wasn't aware of why I was the way I was,

why certain things triggered me,

why I felt like I had to prove myself to others,

why I felt the need to succeed

or put high expectations on myself,

why I was ambitious in the first place.

Was I naturally that way?

Or was I doing it because society taught me to?

Or because I was trying to prove myself  to my parents or peers or whatever?

Recognize where these internal drives are truly coming from. 

Are they coming from a natural, healthy place?

Or are they coming from trauma and an unhealthy place?

Are you placing your self worth in something outside of yourself?

This is something we talk about on this channel,

so I'll link the self-worth playlist there and down below.

But this is something that,

the earlier you can start digging, excavating,

and understanding yourself,

the sooner you can feel more at peace and free in your life.

#6 is: Learn to be your authentic self.

This one is easier said than done,

but something I wish I had in my twenties was the confidence to just be myself,

to say what I want to say, express how I feel,

and allow my personality to shine in its real form.

I felt like I didn't really know who I was.

I filtered myself depending on who I as with.

There were so many times where I tried to be more like this person,

or I tried to be a certain way so that I thought people would like me better.

But the truth is, people will love you

if you are your authentic self, if you are confident in yourself.

And it takes time, I understand, to build that confidence and that self love.

That's an entire journey that we talk about on this channel.

But the sooner you can do that, the happier you will be,

because every day gets easier.

Every day gets easier if you love yourself,

you support yourself, and you are confident in yourself.

You have to learn that you are already worthy

and already lovable as you are, as your authentic self.

There's nothing you need to change.

You don't have to try to be more like someone else.

You don't have to hide certain parts of yourself.

You have to learn to just let go of that fear,

put down the filter, and just be more of yourself.

If you don't know who you are yet, that's okay.

This is your time to learn who you are

and do the things that make you feel good, that bring you joy.

Do the things, say the things that just naturally come out of you,

that make you feel like you are shining,

because that is your authentic truest self.

Lesson #7: I'm sure you've all heard  the saying “Follow your passion”.

And although it could be good advice to some people,

it doesn't really apply to most of us

because when we're in our twenties,