- It does, here have some more.

- 確實如此，這裡還有一些。

(rock music)

(搖滾音樂)

- Beth or Rip, parenting edition.

- 貝絲或瑞普，育兒版。

Who would you rather have the birds and the bees talk with,

你願意讓鳥兒和蜜蜂與誰交談。

Beth or Rip?

貝絲還是瑞普？

- Rip.

- Rip。

- Beth.

- 貝絲。

- Beth's gonna be more fun. (laughs)

- 貝絲會更有趣。(笑)

- Yeah, for sure.

- 是的，肯定的。

- Baby, I love our man-to-man talks,

- 寶貝，我喜歡我們男人之間的談話。

but we need to set some goddamn boundaries here.

但我們需要在這裡設定一些該死的界限。

- I'd rather just get right to the point.

- 我寧願直接進入正題。

I'm not trying to have a whole conversation about it.

我並不是想就這個問題進行整體對話。

(group laughs)

(集體大笑)

That's what I think.

這就是我的想法。

And so I think Rip will just... (fingers snap)

是以，我認為Rip將只是......（手指打顫）。

- Yeah Rip's birds and bees talk is incredibly simple.

- 是的，裡普的鳥和蜜蜂的談話是令人難以置信的簡單。

- Pretty quick, just do it.

- 相當快，就這樣做。

Like, all right bro.

就像，好吧，兄弟。

- Beth's is elaborate.

- 貝絲的是精心設計的。

- It focuses on the erogenous zones.

- 它的重點是發情區。

- Is that Latin?

- 那是拉丁語嗎？

- Beth or Rip.

- 貝絲或裡普。

You get an F in geometry, you come home from school,

你的幾何學得了F，你從學校回到家。

who do you tell, Beth or Rip?

你會告訴誰，貝絲還是瑞普？

- Sorry, Rip, didn't have the heart to tell ya.

- 對不起，裡普，我沒忍心告訴你。

- Rip.

- Rip。

- Rip, I don't think either of them care though.

- 裡普，我認為他們倆都不關心。

- Rip's so much better, 'cause Beth would be furious.

- 瑞普好得多，因為貝絲會很生氣。

(hand slaps)

(手掌拍打)

- What the fuck did you do, Jamie?

- 你他媽的做了什麼，傑米？

- Rip would go, "I don't care about that shit."

- 裡普會說，"我不關心那些狗屎"。

- We don't do the Pythagorean theorem on this ranch.

- 我們在這個牧場上不做勾股定理。

- Beth would go up to the school and make it a big deal.

- 貝絲會到學校去，把它作為一個大問題。

- If you're gonna calculate the acute angle of a triangle,

- 如果你要計算一個三角形的銳角。

you calculate it with me!

你和我一起計算吧!

- Yeah, no you definitely want to ask Rip.

- 是的，不，你肯定要問裡普。

- Yeah, for sure not, yeah.

- 是的，肯定不是，是的。

Go ahead.

請講。

- And so I was gonna do more geometry jokes,

- 是以，我打算做更多的幾何學笑話。

but that one, we barely got over the finish line with that one.

但那一次，我們幾乎沒有越過終點線，那一次。

(group laughs)

(集體大笑)

(country music)

(鄉村音樂)

(people cheering)

(人們歡呼)

- Who's more strict about TV time, Beth or Rip?

- 貝絲和瑞普誰對電視時間要求更嚴格？

- Beth.

- 貝絲。

- Beth.

- 貝絲。

- I think Rip is more strict about TV time,

- 我認為裡普對電視時間要求比較嚴格。

Rip doesn't have any time for TV.

裡普沒有任何時間看電視。

- That's a tricky one, he doesn't even have a television.

- 這是個棘手的問題，他甚至沒有電視。

- I don't know if he has one.

- 我不知道他是否有一個。

- That's a good point. - Yeah, ain't got much.

- 這是一個很好的觀點。- 是的，沒有多少。

- Beth or Rip, these are easy.

- 貝絲或裡普，這些都很容易。

You need a parent to volunteer to chaperone

你需要有一位家長自願陪護

an eighth grade dance, who do you ask?

一個八年級的舞蹈，你問誰？

- First we're gonna dance.

- 首先我們要跳舞。

- Rip.

- Rip。

- Beth.

- 貝絲。

- Absolutely Rip.

- 絕對是裡普。

- Yeah, he's not gonna say anything,

- 是的，他不會說什麼。

he's just gonna go. - Because no one's

他只是要走了。- 因為沒有人

gonna get pregnant.

會懷孕。

If you ask Beth, you might have some knocked up teenager.

如果你問貝絲，你可能有一些被敲詐的少年。

(group laughs) - Everybody's getting-

(每個人都在...

- She'd be like why don't you show some skin?

- 她會說，你為什麼不展示一些皮膚？

Why don't you really turn it up a little bit?

你為什麼不真的把它調高一點呢？

- I shoulda known it was you.

- 我早該知道是你。

- I feel like Beth would spike the punch.

- 我覺得貝絲會秒殺這一拳。

- That's why you don't ask her!

- 這就是為什麼你不問她!

- Get the teachers drunk.

- 把老師們灌醉。

Like, do something ridiculous.

比如，做一些可笑的事情。

- Oh, so that's why you wanted her to be there.

- 哦，所以這就是你希望她在那裡的原因。

- I think it would be fun.

- 我認為這將會很有趣。

- Need a drink?

- 需要喝一杯嗎？

- Who would you rather go clothes shopping with?

- 你願意和誰一起去買衣服？

- I mean, Rip wears the same thing every day,

- 我的意思是，裡普每天都穿同樣的東西。

and I prefer to wear the same thing every day, so Rip.

而且我喜歡每天都穿同一件衣服，所以Rip。

- I have five shirts and a pair of boots, Beth.

- 我有五件襯衫和一雙靴子，貝絲。

- Yeah Rip wears the same thing every day and it's great.

- 是的，裡普每天都穿同樣的東西，這很好。

- I don't wanna think- - Beth also wears

- 我不想去想------貝絲也穿上了

a lot of great clothes.

很多很棒的衣服。

- But I would take Rip, I don't care

- 但我願意接受裡普，我不在乎。

to think about clothes. - I would take Beth.

來考慮衣服的問題。- 我想帶貝絲去。

I would rather go clothes shopping with Beth.

我寧願和貝絲一起去買衣服。

- Get a pair of boots, decent jacket, and a hat.

- 買一雙靴子，像樣的外套，還有一頂帽子。

- Don't like wearing hats.

- 不喜歡戴帽子。

- Well then you picked the wrong line of work, buddy.

- 那麼你就選錯了行當，夥計。

- Who are you going to for a motivational speech

- 你要去找誰做勵志演講？

Beth or Rip?

貝絲還是瑞普？

- Beth.

- 貝絲。

- Oh man, they're both gonna be so bad.

- 哦，夥計，他們都會很糟糕。

- You have no future, none.

- 你沒有未來，沒有。

- I need my assistants to put all their efforts

- 我需要我的助手們投入所有的努力

into not being pussies.

變成不是娘娘腔的人。

- Who can tell you, "You're gonna make it."?

- 誰能告訴你，"你會成功的。"？

- Rip's gonna, Rip.

- 瑞普會的，瑞普。

- Rip's gonna tell you- - Beth's gonna make it worse.

- 瑞普會告訴你---貝絲會讓事情變得更糟。

- Beth is gonna tell you why you should probably-

- 貝絲會告訴你為什麼你應該...

- You should quit.

- 你應該退出。

- If you're feeling insecure, you're probably right.

- 如果你覺得沒有安全感，你可能是對的。

- You're one of those, huh?

- 你是其中之一，嗯？

- One of what?

- 什麼之一？

- The kind of man who uses flowers to say I'm sorry

- 那種用鮮花來表達我的歉意的人

'cause he doesn't have the balls to say it himself.

因為他沒有膽量自己說出來。

- Yeah, it's gonna get worse before it gets better.

- 是的，在變好之前，情況會變得更糟。

- I feel ugly, well you are.

- 我覺得自己很醜，嗯，你是。

Wow, that's not great. - Exactly.

哇，這不是很好。- 正是如此。

Oh that's my greatest fear.

哦，這是我最大的恐懼。

(Denim laughs)

(Denim笑)

- Yeah, yeah, Rip has given some

- 是的，是的，裡普已經給了一些

pretty incredible motivational speeches

相當令人難以置信的勵志演說

over the course of the show. - Especially to Beth

在節目的過程中。- 特別是對貝絲

and to Jimmy. - To Beth, to Jimmy.

和對吉米。- 為了貝絲，為了吉米。

- I'm gonna show you how to get rid of problems

- 我將告訴你如何擺脫問題

so they don't become new problems.

所以它們不會成為新的問題。

If you don't like the room, then eat in a different room.

如果你不喜歡這個房間，那就在另一個房間吃飯。

Life is plenty hard, you don't need to help it, you hear me?

生活有很多困難，你不需要幫助它，你聽到了嗎？

- That's true. - Just watch him

- 這倒是真的。- 只要看著他

earn like father of the year awards in the upcoming seasons.

在即將到來的幾個賽季中獲得像年度最佳父親的獎項。

- Oh yeah! - He's gonna turn into someone

- 哦，是的！他要變成一個人。- 他要變成一個人了

that we're all like... (gasps)

我們都像......（喘氣）。

- Beautiful.

- 很漂亮。

- Who would you rather have as a parent?

- 你願意讓誰做父母？

- You either have Beth as your mom or Rip as father?

- 你要麼讓貝絲做你的母親，要麼讓裡普做父親？

- Say they're single parent, single mom or single dad.

- 說他們是單親，單親媽媽或單親爸爸。

- Rip. - Same.

- 裡普。- 一樣。

- I would Beth.

- 我將貝絲。

- Rip seems like he'll at least be there.

- 裡普看起來至少會在那裡。

I don't know if... - He's gonna be there,

我不知道，如果......他將會在那裡。

but he's not gonna open up.

但他不會開口的。

He's gonna be one of those dads

他將成為那些父親中的一員

that you spend your whole life trying to impress.

你一生都在試圖打動他們。

- Yeah, but I feel I'd rather take that,

- 是的，但我覺得我寧願接受這個。

I don't know what Beth is gonna be-

我不知道貝絲會成為什麼...

- It's not great it either way.

- 無論哪種方式都不是很好。

- We'll just continue with the illusion

- 我們就繼續幻想吧

that we're one big happy family.

我們是一個快樂的大家庭。

- Who would you rather be punished by?

- 你寧願被誰懲罰？

- I'm having trouble. - Already?

- 我有麻煩了。- 已經有了嗎？

- Oh, Rip it's physical, Beth it's emotional.

- 哦，裡普是身體上的，貝絲是情感上的。

- Who would you say?

- 你會說是誰呢？

- Rip. (bomb explodes)

- 瑞普。(炸彈爆炸)

I think it's fair.

我認為這很公平。

- Goddamn you for making me do this.

- 該死的，你讓我這麼做。

(fist punching) - Beth's gonna be like,

(拳頭打) - 貝絲會像。

10 years later, she's gonna be stabbing you

10年後，她將會刺傷你

under the table with a fork.

在桌子下面用叉子。

- Oh!

- 哦!

- You took the car out past curfew and crashed it,

- 你過了宵禁時間把車開出去，然後把它撞壞了。

which parent would you rather tell?

你願意告訴哪位家長？

- What did I do wrong?

- 我做錯了什麼？

- You know what you did wrong.

- 你知道你做錯了什麼。

- Again, I'm going with Rip.

- 再一次，我選擇了瑞普。

- I'm gonna stay with Beth.

- 我要和貝絲呆在一起。

I don't know maybe it's my own weirdness.

我不知道，也許這是我自己的怪癖。

- Beth doesn't care about a fucking car

- 貝絲並不關心該死的汽車

she'd be like, who cares?

她會說，誰在乎呢？

- Right and wrong, good and evil, there's no such thing.

- 對與錯，善與惡，沒有這回事。

- Rip has like a sense of responsibility

- 裡普有像責任感

and Rip would be like,

和裡普會像。

"Oh no, we broke one of John Dutton's cars."

"哦不，我們弄壞了約翰-達頓的一輛車。"

Beth would be like, "Who gives a fuck?"

貝絲會說，"誰他媽的在乎？"

- I'm gonna teach you a trick

- 我要教你一招

so that you don't blow this opportunity.

這樣你就不會失去這個機會。

Don't think that you deserve it.

不要認為你應該得到它。

You don't deserve it,

你不配擁有它。

and you never will.

而且你永遠不會。

(rock music)

(搖滾音樂)