are two beautiful skills you have to master

to be an effective negotiator,

and I have great news for you.

You've been anchoring and framing all your life.

I'm just going to turn the light on

so you can see what you've been doing.

Anchoring is landing your idea or request.

You anchor with numbers,

say, when you ask for a 20% raise,

and you anchor with ideas or proposals,

say, when you ask permission to work remotely.

Framing is building a perspective.

It's how you package or back up your request.

Now going back to the remote work example,

let's put the two together.

You might say this.

"Now that I've been given responsibility

for managing three new projects,

I'm really concerned about meeting deliverables on time.

What I'd like to propose is working remotely on Friday

so I can dot all the I's

and cross all the T's without interruption.

How can you help me work that out?"

So let's break it down.

The anchor was the request to work remotely,

and the frame was the concern

for meeting deliverables on time.

If you were making this request,

what I want you to notice is how the framing

is not just about why remote work is good for you,

but how it will benefit your team or company.

What's in it for them?

So when you tie your request

to quantifiable business case reasons,

like efficiency and productivity

or money saved and money earned,

you increase your chances of getting to yes.

After you anchor and frame,

you want to finish with a diagnostic open-ended question,

so you can jumpstart conversation and brainstorming.

"How can you help me work that out?"

is a crafty little question.

It assumes that your conversation partner

wants to help you work it out,

and that all there is to do is to figure out the how.

Now, here's one final point about anchoring.

Resist the temptation to negotiate against yourself

by saying things like, "I know it's a lot to ask, but,"

or, "Remote work would be great,

but I'd be happy

with just an occasional day here and there."

Be definite.

Anchor and frame with confidence,

and let your requests land.

Doing this demonstrates your leadership

and helps you find your way to a better deal.

(upbeat music)