"When?" asks Firestar

"Well... not in the next nine to eleven books" responds Clearsky

Jaykit, Hollykit and Lionkit are too big for the nursery

Besides Jaykit, Jaykit is short, like his mom. His mom, Squirrelflight. Squirrelflight is the mom.

Molepaw is dead, Rainwhisker is dead. Rest in peace off screen casualties

The three kits decide to go chase some foxes off the territory bc they don't feel special enough.

They find the baby foxes and they are huuge, but if the children are nearly apprentices

That means they are nearly as tall as full grown cats, besides Jaykit maybe, who is small

So this fox cubs better be super old, do you hear me Erin Hunter?

Jaykit then runs off a cliff and mistakes Spottedleaf's ghost for his mother, teaching us that he is blind.

the kits are rounded up and punished for being terrible, besides Jaykit

Jaykit is short, like his mom!

His mom, Moonkitti. Moonkitti is the mom

Hollykit wants to be important, the center of attention,

and better than everybody else

She scams herself into Leafpool's favor by pretending to know more about herbs

than she actually does

Lionpaw is given to his mom's ex, Hollypaw to her aunt

to keep the power in the family, and Jaypaw is given to Brightheart

Jaypaw hates Brightheart. He listens to nothing she says

because she's Brightheart and she's blind in one eye

In the opinion of jaypaw, who is blind in both eyes

So she makes Jaypaw do yoga excersizes

while Lionpaw and Hollypaw are out having a good time.

This just makes him angrier, so he sneaks out and falls in the lake

Crowfeather and his ONLY son, Breezepaw

take him home awkwardly. Really exciting book so far,

lots of Jaypaw walking off cliffs and stuff

Lionpaw almost falls off of something too but

Ashfur saves him like the kind, supportive cat he is

Lionpaw meets several terrible windclan apprentices at the gathering

while Mousepaw flirts with a girl that we never see again!

Then the gathering is crashed by Graystripe and Millie! "who?"

You know, Millie!

The cats all just throw a fit about Millie being there because

they don't have a reasonable bone in their bodies. Then Squirrelflight says

"Hey, stop!" and everybody stops

"It's finally time to throw away Brambleclaw"

says Thunderclan. Jaypaw, a -Warrior- apprentice

follows Leafpool to the moonpool

for no real reason.

He spies on her while she flirts with dead cats, but is immediately caught.

Leafpool decides she wants this one instead.

Hollypaw sucks at healing and is excellent at hurting, like some kind of robot designed

only to kill. Shadowclan moves the border

over a few feet just to bully Thunderclan for being to liberal.

Then they lose to a bunch of thorn bushes and the border situation is

immediately resolved. Jaypaw has the horrible super power of

knowing how other people feel and instead of using that to help

them, it just makes him angry with everyone all the time.

Meanwhile Hollypaw knows everything about- and is extremely loyal to-

the warrior code

despite it seeming like no-one has strongly taught her or influenced her

in that direction. I think I'm just going to blame Ferncloud

for this one; she is married to Dustpelt

and he's pretty - traditional, I guess? I-I don't know

Jaypaw visits the magic puddle AGAIN

despite *totally* not wanting to be a doctor or anything.

He goes to Starclan but hangs out too close to the edge or something

and gets the "Brambleclaw family reunion" treatment

Tigerstar is about to teach Jaypaw how to KILL

when Spottedleaf teleports behind him and unsheathes her katana

"Become a medicine cat" says Spottedleaf

"No"

"Do it I swear to me"

"No"

"Become a medicine cat or so help me I will turn this Starclan around!"

At the same time, Kill-o-tron Murderbot realizes

that healing people disgusts her and all she wants

is to destroy as much life as possible within

the established rules of her society.

Killerpaw and Jaypaw get switched but she doesn't get Jaypaw's old mentor

because Brightheart will either train a blind cat or die alone

and apprentice-free, apparently.

Firestar gives Hollypaw Cardboardfur as her new mentor which means

I definitely have to redraw him. Brackenfur's training

method is running around aimlessly and expecting Hollypaw to

follow him, only fueling her murderous thoughts.

Jaypaw decides if or not he likes people based on how little they help him.

Willowpaw tries to save him from a ditch? WIllowpaw sucks!

Willowpaw lets him fall over like an idiot? Willowpaw's greaaat!

Jaypaw finds out that Mothwing is an atheist and is very upset by it;

Something that every medicine cat is going to do until Mothwing dies

Lionpaw fights an entire dog and nobody questions it

Then little baby Breezepaw tells everyone they're ugly before they leave

Mousefur gets sick; not because it was unpreventable

but instead because Jaypaw just doesn't care.

Suddenly, all of the clans are sick with "Jaypaw Sucks" disease

Poppypaw starts to die so Jaypaw materializes in her dream

"Hey Jaypaw"

"Time to die lmao" Says Poppypaw before he shoves her back

into her body. At the gathering, Blackstar announces

that the sickness has been caused by Thunderclan playing Dungeons and Dragons

and listening to rock music. The clans decide that

the only way this can be settled is by making their children fight each other

so they set up the Warrior Cat Olympics

Jaypaw prefers the Winter Olympics, so he stays home.

If the cats did this in the fist series, Shadowclan would just attack them while they're out

but Jaypaw suddenly has a vision of Lionpaw losing at table tennis

and he rushes to his aid

Murderface the 3rd is completely destroying Heatherpaw in hand-to-hand combat

when jaypaw runs into her

Breezepaw and Lionpaw have gotten into a high stakes table tennis game

Where the loser loses his soul. Jaypaw and Killpaws last minute cheers

save Lionpaw but Breezepaw falls into the darkness

Jaypaw jumps in and barely saves Breezepaw's soul from destruction.

Crowfeather and Nightcloud worry about their son but Leafpool assures them that

"Nothing's wrong, he's just evil now!"

"Oh, okay he was already like that" Responds Crowfeather

Jaypaw sneaks into Firestar's memories and hears a prophecy about his siblings having superpowers.

"Woah, I can't believe I have superpowers!"

Says the cat who's been pulling this dream-walking and memory reading thing all book