Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

So an actor is saying his lines and then out of nowhere he just starts singing?

Yes!

Well, that is the stupidest thing that I have ever heard.

You're doing a play, got something to say, so you sing it?

It's absurd.

Who on earth is going to sit there while an actor breaks into song?

What possible thought could the audience think other than, this is horribly wrong?

Remarkably, they won't think that.

Seriously?

And why not?

Because it's a musical, a musical, and nothing's as amazing as a musical, where crooners croon a catchy tune, and limber-leggy ladies thrill you till you swoon.

Oozers, big applause, and a standing ovation.

The future is bright if you can just write a musical.

Some make you happy, some make you sad.

Some are quite big, some quite small.

Some are too long, some are just plays with song.

Some musicals have no talking at all.

No talking at all?

That's right, there's no talking.

All of the dialogue is sung in a very dramatic fashion.

And they often stay on one note for a very long time, so that when they change to a different note, you notice.

And it's supposed to create a dramatic effect, but mostly you just sit there asking yourself, why aren't they talking?

Sounds miserable.

I believe it's pronounced miserably.

Do people actually like this?

No, they love it.

And what's not to love?

It's such a delight.

There's nothing quite like a musical.

Wait, I haven't even told you the best part yet.

What the hell are you doing now?

It's called a dance break.

Apparently this happens in musicals as well.

People on stage just burst into spontaneous dance.

Why, does it advance the plot?

No.

Advanced character.

Not necessarily.

Why do it?

Because it's entertaining.

Five, six, seven, eight.

I'm not a vision.

It's a musical.

What do you talk?

What do you talk?

It's a musical.

A suzical.

No, a musical with girls on stage.

A musical.

We've got snappy repartee and the women are risque.

And the chorus boys are kind of gay.

A musical.

A true blue blue musical.

Oh, stand back.

It's a musical.

It's a musical.

A big and shiny, mighty, fine, glitter glitz and chorus line.

Bop your head and shake your body.

Musical.

It's a musical.

It's a musical.

It is a musical.

Yes, they get it now.

We'll do a musical.

No kidding.

A musical.

What could be more amazing than a musical?

With song and dance.

And sweet romance.

And with the musical, we might have, have a chance.

Big applause with everyone cheering for us.

And for some unexplainable reason, the crowd goes wild every time.

When dancers kick in unison in one big wonderful line.

And then you knock yourself.

A musical.

A musical.

A la la la la la la la la.

A musical.

With flashy style and a big big smile.

A snazzy dance with jazzy hands.

I swear that I'd drop my heart, vote to die, if it isn't a doozy.

Take it from me.

They'll be flocking to see.

You start with one quick, big hit.

Musical.

A big, big musical.