Guillermo and I, Guillermo was dressed as the truth fairy, as we called you, we brought some kids in and we hooked them up to a polygraph machine.

People seemed to like it, so we did it again.

This is a young man named Ethan.

Ethan's parents gave me some information about him in advance, and I used that information to extract the truth, even a little more than the truth from Ethan.

Enjoy.

I'm going to ask you some questions, and all you have to do is tell me the absolute truth, okay?

Okay.

Are you capable of doing that?

Yes.

Okay, good.

We're going to start off with your name.

What is your name?

Ethan.

Ethan, very good.

What grade are you in, Ethan?

Second.

How old are you?

Eight.

Eight years old.

Do you have a girlfriend?

No.

I'm going to ask you again.

Do you have a girlfriend?

No.

What is your girlfriend's name?

Nobody.

What is her name?

You can tell us.

You're among friends.

Yeah.

Guy talk.

I don't know.

We won't tell your mom.

Tell us.

No.

This kid is crazy.

Yeah.

All right, let's move on to another topic.

Have you ever been in trouble at school?

Yes.

For what?

Okay, I went to an inappropriate site because of my friend.

A website?

Yes, he said it was a game website.

It was a what?

A game website.

A game website, okay.

Yes, but it wasn't.

Wow, what it was?

Yeah, what it was.

Oh, were there naked ladies on it?

Yeah.

Wow.

Oh my goodness.

Did you like looking at that website?

No.

You've got to be kidding me.

Just a little bit?

No, I didn't like it.

Huh?

Can we go to another topic?

You want to go to a different topic?

Let's get back to your girlfriends.

Are there any girls that you like at school?

No.

How does that machine know all this stuff?

It just knows.

It can tell when you're lying because something about your body lets it know.

Has any girl ever tried to kiss you at school?

No.

A little bit?

No.

Wow, you're a tough nut to crack.

Coconuts crack.

I don't crack.

Coconuts crack?

Yeah, they do.

Have you done time?

Where did you come from?

I want to ask you some questions.

You want to ask me some questions?

Yes.

I'd be happy to answer some questions.

Okay, go ahead and ask me any questions you want.

Do you have a girlfriend?

Yes, I do have a girlfriend.

Just like you do.

I don't.

How does that thing even know if I don't have a hair?

It can sense you from over here.

Have you ever been to jail?

No.

That's what you did.

You were in jail because you were acting like a policeman and you shot someone.

No, I wasn't.

Ask me about your girlfriends.

What color hair does she have?

I knew it.

Yeah.

And her hair is colored, too.

I knew she had colored hair.

She doesn't have colored hair.

Oh, she has no hair.

You have a bald girlfriend.

No, I don't.

Yes, you do.

No.

Take him away, truth fairy.

And don't you ever try to bring your lies into this room again.

You understand me?

I'll get you.