So I started to Google this. 30,000 people die each year from guns. And is that a lot? Definitely.

One life is too many. But also, is 30,000 people a lot? I don't know.

See, some of you thought about it for a second, too. Because this is why. You could Google it after.

40,000 people die each year from tripping and falling. Those are the numbers, right, Sai?

Do with what you want to. 30,000, bang, ugh, which is definitely terrible.

But remember, 40,000, are you fucking kidding me?

Those are the numbers. Do with what you want to.

So my point is that the chances of somebody shooting you and killing you is a little lower than somebody shooting you, missing, and you going, oh my God, she missed. Are you serious, though?

I just want you to remember that. And since we're on a little dark note, I'm going to make it just a little bit lighter.

These are also the statistics. 30,000 people get shot and die, but more than half of them shot themselves.

How beautiful is that? Only in America we get to see Jesus when we want to.

Some of you are like, oh yeah, where I come from. Dude, if you want to see Jesus, you got to wait in line, buddy.

Or you got to jump off a building. Are you serious? How scary is it to jump off a building?

Oh, because first of all, I'm scared of heights. That's a real thing. And second of all, I'm super indecisive.

Which floor do you go? 50? Too high. That's way too long to regret it.

Oh, wait. Too late, Jason. You fucked up. Chose the wrong floor.

Oh yeah, but then go lower. Seven. Seven? Are you serious?

What am I going to mess around and survive on accident? I'm trying to commit.

Oh, my legs. I was sad on the inside. Now I'm hurting on the outside too.

And I understand. Some of you like, you know, this is a dark subject.

And I know. And sometimes I get sad too. And that's why I want to make light of it and have a goofy good time.

And that's why you guys laughed at that. Because you guys could relate.

Everybody thought about doing it one time, you know.

And if you haven't thought about it one time, you're a potato of a person.

And you should definitely kill yourself.

And some of you are like, oh, Jason, you shouldn't say that. Like, you know, that's so messed up that you said that.

Like, if you're going to take advice from a comedian, kill yourself again.

Like, kill yourself one time. And if you don't, one more time.

Because we are a comedian. These are, you know, goofy good times here.

Yeah, but I don't know. I don't really have strong opinions, though. I don't have strong opinions.

I'm sorry. I know it seems like it. But I'm swayed easily.

Sometimes a lot of people have strong opinions. And sometimes I get jealous of that.

Because if you have strong opinions, it shows confidence. And people appreciate confidence, you know.

But sometimes I think, like, with new information, your perspective changes.

Like, the only thing I'm confident about is that I don't have strong opinions.

For example, when I was a kid, I never understood how there's so many homeless people.

I never understood that. My dad's always like, oh, because they're lazy. They didn't work hard.

And I just believed that. But then as you grow, you start to pay bills every month.

Not one month off. Everybody just doing this every single month.

And then your perspective changed.

Now, I'm like, how is there not more homeless people?

Like, how are most of us not homeless?

Because I Googled this, too.

70% of Americans, probably not in Manhattan Beach, but 73% of Americans have under $1,000 in their savings account.

I was like, I did not know there's that many people have that much money.

See, I told you, with the laughter, not in Manhattan.

Yeah, you guys look like you own boats. Look at this guy's shirt. For sure he owns two boats.

Well, my point is that your perspective changed.

Like, when I was a kid, my dad's always like, man, if you want to be successful, all you got to do is you got to work hard.

And that's not true.

Because we all need a little bit of luck.

Everybody needs a little bit of luck to dodge these surprises that life gives all of us.

Oh, you're on your way, and life is sneaky.

Oh, you're on your way to work, and you're tired, Pop?

Life's like, boo, surprise.

You're also tired.

Life is sneaky.

Oh, you like to be successful and doing stand-up comedy?

Life's like, boo, surprise, pandemic.

And you're also fired.

Perspective changed. Never understood how there's so many homeless people.

My dad's like, oh, because they're lazy, and I believe that.

Now I'm like, dude, homeless people are just us regular people that got too many surprises at once.

Homeless people just hit the jackpot of surprises.

They're like, oh my gosh, all for me?

What is this box of?

A box of mental illness. How fancy.

I wonder who's it from.

Jesus Christ himself.

I guess I can't return it.

My thing is just we should just give each other the benefit of the doubt, you know?

Hey, benefit of the doubt is a long word, huh?

Like, you ever say it halfway and just give up and use tongue?

It's a benefit of the doubt.

I think they got it. They got it.

Yeah, because people always shame, you know?

Like, I don't think people should shame because, yeah, you know, it's all perspective.

Like, I have a friend who's always on social media.

It makes me feel really guilty.

She's always like, don't eat the cows.

They're literally slaughtering them.

You're a monster if you eat them.

And it's like, I don't want the cows to die either.

But I don't know how else to eat the steak.

If there are other solutions, I would like to explore that with you.

But so far, the moo-moo's got to go in my tum-tum.

Don't shame is a thing. It doesn't feel good.

Like, this is another thing.

I have a dog, and it's my first dog, and I love my dog.

Yeah, but this lady, when I went to the park, she shamed me.

Especially in LA.

I got it from a breeder, and I didn't know this was a problem.

She looked at my dog, looked at my face, and went like this.

Oh.

I'm like, what do you mean, oh?

She's like, well, mine's a rescue.

Do you see Todd and its only leg?

I'm like, yeah, it looks like a kebab.

She's like, yeah, but I rescue that.

Before I continue, I just want to say this.

Of course, there's loving people who loves animals even more than humans sometimes.

I could respect and admire that, but I hate when people virtuous and go, I'm a good, but I rescue.

It's like, yeah, obviously.

No animals come out this way.

It looks like a wet lollipop that caught hair on it.

I rescue.

But I still felt really guilty because I'm a human being, and then I started to do research.

And I found that 2 million pets each year, they'll go from the breeder where I got it from straight, right?

2 million.

They'll go to a bad home, get abused, beaten, and abandoned.

And some people, not all, they'll go to the shelter.

They go, oh, look who needs my help.

Don't worry.

I am now here in Jesus's image to rescue you.

The word rescue in the English language, as I've learned, means save from danger.

Why did you wait for it to get beaten first?

Yeah, I didn't wait.

I went straight to the source.

I rescued it.

I rescued it with money.

You are just a cheap bastard is what you are.

You just didn't want to pay for extra legs.

Yeah, because legs cost money.

How about you love your dog, I love my dog, and we both go home?

How about we just give each other the benefit of the doubt?

Thank you guys so much.

Y'all been great.

Thank you.