They should just shut up. It's just, it's very easy.

What? Is he talking about me? Did David Chang just ask Uncle Roger to shut up?

Haiyaa, Nephew David. The world need authenticity police like Uncle Roger.

Otherwise, we're going to let people like Jamie Oliver destroy all our food.

Today, we're going to review David Chang, the inventor of chili crunch.

For these and nephew who don't know, earlier this year, Nephew David tried to trademark the word chili crunch.

Yeah, chili crunch. Random Asian ingredient he also can trademark.

Nephew David caused biggest stir in Asian community since COVID.

And by the way, this is going to be Uncle Roger's final egg fried rice review because I hear he's going to trademark fried rice next.

Just kidding. I love egg fried rice so much, even my latest hoodie got myself eating egg fried rice on there. Fuiyoh.

The text even got 3D effect. But the coolest thing is this front patch interchangeable.

Can say niece, can say nephew also. So go to UncleRogerMerch.com right now and buy.

There's going to be no wok hei. I'm not trying to do anything.

Just want to make something tasty and quick. Okay, fried rice is made in my house.

Okay, okay. He admit no wok hei. Fine. Because he cooking at home, don't have high power burner.

But at least he use wok.

Okay, fried rice is made in my house almost every day, right?

We almost always take the rice cooked from the day before and roll it into breakfast of some sort.

Mmm, that correct. Uncle Roger miss having rice for breakfast.

Western country, nobody here eat rice for breakfast.

They eat dumb bullshit like, like bagel. Haiya. Bagel is just shitty donut.

First, I'm just going to peel these. Finish peeling these.

Mmm, shrimp good fuiyoh. This going to be atas breakfast.

Atas is Malaysian slang for bougie. For rich people, pretentious. That how we say.

Another new word to learn for niece and nephew.

Fuck Duolingo. Uncle Roger teach you new language.

Actually Duolingo, please sponsor Uncle Roger.

Uncle Roger want to work with the big bird. One orange, one green. It going to be great.

Nice peeling. Good.

The only reason I'm deciding to use this is if I didn't have any of this stuff, I would...

Show the shrimp. Show his face for what? Okay, okay.

Cut back to shrimp. What the hell? Who this camera guy? Show the food. Haiya.

...eating pokunpap. You know, my mom would make every kind of fried rice.

Pokunpap, Korean for fried rice. ...all the time.

What, what, what, what with that shaky camera? Who you getting to film this video?

Car dealership balloon guy, is it?

Car dealership balloon guy, is it?

Okay, cutting up shrimp. Haiya, film from other angle. Now his hand blocking everything.

If I had a couple strips of bacon, I'd use this.

Bacon?

Leftover steak from the night before, this would be going in.

Okay, bacon and leftover steak. I guess that okay, because he say he making leftover fried rice. Just whatever in fridge.

But sometimes you don't always want to cook with only leftover food.

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I'm never making like fried rice at home at least.

Okay, chili good. And plastic chopping board, see?

That how you know nephew David come from professional kitchen.

They all use plastic chopping board because that's the secret to good egg fried rice, microplastic.

Okay, oil go in, good.

What is that? Shaky cam again.

And now everything out of focus. Is your camera guy's TV wonder? Haiyaa.

Can't even tell what that is. I think that garlic.

Replay a bit. Yeah, yeah. Okay. That definitely garlic.

Part of how I think about home cooking is having your pantry, having your kitchen, having your kitchen.

Part of how I think about home cooking is having your pantry, having your staple set of things that you can always depend on.

Correct. That being, you know, vinegar.

My salts. Of course he gonna pluck all his own thing.

Momofuku is David Chang brand, very successful in America.

But Uncle Roger see this design, it feel expensive already.

Anytime that any food brand that try to mimic handwriting, you know it gonna be expensive.

Let's see how much it is. $12 for 8 ounces. Haiyaa, that's so expensive.

Lee Kum Kee soy sauce, $3 for twice the size.

And his pantry starter pack, $55. If you're gonna spend this much money, just go buy Uncle Roger hoodie. Let Uncle Roger rip you off instead, okay?

And what the hell restaurant grade even mean?

Anything is restaurant grade if you don't give a shit about customer.

The things you're gonna need, cooking oils, something sweet, sugar, agave, whatever.

And once I know I have that, then...

Show the food, he tossing. Don't show his face.

Okay, good, good. Shrimp go in, good.

Show the food. This camera guy in love with nephew David.

Haiyaa, why you stir with little spoon like that?

Sure, I know, it not nonstick pan, you can use metal.

But don't teach people like this. People gonna use this technique, they're gonna burn themselves. Use long ladle or spatula, don't use this teaspoon.

Haiyaa.

I took some, I had some leftover scallions.

It's really not...

Scallion, okay.

Some leftover scallions, a knob of Anaheim chili, and I think five...

Show the food.

And...

Okay, sauteing, look good.

I haven't added any seasoning yet.

This is my impression of nephew David, cameraman.

There are war zone footage out there that look less hectic.

I'm gonna add some savory salt.

Savory salt.

And with that sound effect some more, just say it, MSG.

Don't be pussy, just say it.

Don't be pussy, just admit it, MSG.

MSG not bad for you.

Uncle Roger opening my own restaurant in September.

Every dish gonna have MSG.

He said, nephew, if you smart, you should buy share in Ajinomoto.

When Uncle Roger open my restaurant, their share gonna shoot straight to moon.

Correct, this financial advice.

Teaspoon again.

The stirring motion actually good.

Now I'm gonna add some rice.

Okay, rice go in.

Leftover rice, good.

It's still...

I'm going to think it can be drier.

See, it still look a bit clumpy.

Hope he just press it and separate.

Okay, that good, that good.

Camera, don't need to cut away.

Just show...

Just show rice, don't cut.

Heat's important with cold rice and if I'm using day-old rice,

I really wanna get it heated thoroughly because it has appropriate heat where it makes it less sticky, even if you're using sticky rice.

That correct.

When you heat up rice, it get less sticky.

Uncle Roger don't know why.

There probably some scientific explanation, but who need science?

Cooking is about feeling, not about physics.

What is that?

The honey.

Need a little sweetness in here.

Now he use ladle.

What the hell?

They always taste while cooking, correct?

So again, I just have the leftover shrimp.

You're not gonna tell us how it taste?

Then taste on camera for what?

Teach people how it taste and how you gonna adjust.

Anaheim chili, the tiniest bit of scallions.

Shaky cam.

And now he even try to zoom.

Camera guy, just get the basic down.

You can't even hold camera still and you're trying to zoom in, zoom out.

You can't even walk.

Don't try to fly.

For salt, a little momo soy sauce and a little sugar and agave.

Oh, agave.

Many people use agave like sugar substitute, but Uncle Roger don't agree.

Why you want your fried rice sweet?

Maybe this American think everything sweet here.

Uncle Roger getting diabetes soon.

Rice look okay.

Okay, egg, egg good.

Crack.

Nice cracking technique.

Crack on other egg.

Nice.

Three eggs.

Three egg, good.

I could have easily just added the eggs with the fried rice.

But my household, myself, I love having a runny egg yolk.

Nice.

Fried egg with runny egg yolk, delicious.

Okay, that's good technique for you.

You put lid on egg like that.

That's how you get crispy egg on bottom, but the egg yolk cook through but still runny.

Otherwise, if you don't have lid like that, the yolk gonna take long time to cook.

The egg bottom gonna be burnt.

I put a little on to help just cook through the yolk just a little bit.

Help just cook through the yolk just a little bit.

If you learn one thing from this video today, learn this egg trick.

It's sizzling.

That a joyful sound.

Fuck you, stop zooming.

Zooming for what?

This is not the office.

This is the first time Uncle Roger leg down from chair because of shitty camera work.

Damn you, David, you have to fire your camera guy.

You seem to yell at everyone who work for you.

Except your shitty camera guy.

Okay.

Oh, of course, it cut away.

Right, Uncle Roger trying to see.

This is very dangerous.

It's super, super dangerous.

What dangerous?

Your camera guy dangerous.

That what?

Giving Uncle Roger motion sickness.

That the legendary trademark chili crunch.

The food he invented.

Tia, one of the things I love is black truffle, white truffle with eggs.

That's just...

And rice, that's all.

Aiya, nephew David, we know you rich.

Most people don't even have black truffle in their wedding.

They're not gonna have black truffle in their fried rice.

But Uncle Roger had to say, the chili crunch actually look quite good.

I want to try it.

Runny yolk, nice.

I want to see more.

That's a good breakfast.

It's better than cereal.

Wait, wait, what, what?

Editor, you're not even gonna show nephew David eating one bite?

What the point of this video?

Just close up of David's head, the whole video.

You don't show food, you don't show cooking, you just show talking.

This not cooking show anymore?

This TED talk?

Okay, this best image of fried rice Uncle Roger can find.

A bit out of focus, but actually look quite good, you know?

The rice got good color, the yolk runny.

The red chili crunch remind me of sambal, that Malaysian chili paste.

But Uncle Roger have to say, the rice still look a bit wet, a bit clumpy in certain part.

Maybe it's the agave he pour.

It like honey, make everything stick together.

Overall, cooking pretty good, but we Jokai make all our ancestors cry.

Yeah, chili crunch, it's just random Asian ingredient you also can trademark.

What next, Uncle Roger gonna trademark fish sauce?

And what the hell restaurant grade even mean?

Anything is restaurant grade if you don't give a shit.

Uncle Roger opening my own restaurant in September.

Niece and nephew, if you're smart, you should buy share in Ajinomoto.