Yeah, wow, cool. Where are you from?

Hong Kong.

Where in Hong Kong?

I'm from New Territory.

The New Territory?

I'm not from Hong Kong main city. I'm from the outskirts of Hong Kong.

So you're not from Hong Kong? Why am I talking to you then?

Yeah, you're from Hong Kong, Hong Kong?

Yeah, sure.

Yeah, sure.

What is this?

You're not from Hong Kong, you're actually from, like, Fo Shan or something? Come on.

Hong Kong, Hong Kong? Okay, anyways.

I've only been learning the important Cantonese.

I've only been learning the curse words.

I gotta say, man, Cantonese curse words are, like, on a totally different level.

They're not only incredibly harsh and brutal, but they're also very efficient in terms of, like, how much hatred they can pack into so few syllables.

You guys know the basic one, right?

Right?

It sounds so cute.

You know what it means? Anybody?

It means, F, your dirty old mom.

Oh, that hurts. Brutal, right?

The one after that.

Which means, I hope you trip and fall in the street.

Oh, pop guy.

I hope you trip and fall in the street.

That is so efficient.

And after that, you got hungar chai, which means, I hope your whole family dies.

But, right?

But, did you know that you can actually combine pop guy and hungar chai into one single word?

And when you do it, it's like, you know when Goku and Vegeta, when they fuse together, they become even more powerful than the two of them individually?

So, pop guy hungar chai means, I hope your whole family trips and falls in the street

And it's run over by a double-decker bus.

Driven by a hot lesbian.

Right?

There you go.

Basically.

Two weeks ago, actually, I hooked up with this girl from Hong Kong.

So, she comes over and we're getting nasty.

She's like, hey.

Do you want me to talk dirty to you?

I'm like, absolutely not.

No.

So, here's the thing though.

This girl was really hot.

And really dumb.

I swear to God, this is true.

The next morning, she's in the bathroom.

She's like, hey, do you have an extra toothbrush I can borrow?

Sure, here you go.

Do you have a towel I can borrow?

Sure, here you go.

Where's your hair dryer?

My hair dryer?

I don't have one.

What do you mean you don't have one?

My hair's soaking wet.

Why don't you have one?

Are you?

I'm sorry.

Oh my God, yeah.

She was just smoking hot.