Hi.

Did you tell your sister to ask me out?

Well, yeah.

Oh, wow.

I mean, wow.

I think she's cute, but I never would have thought of going out with her.

Never.

Really?

Yeah, but after you said it was okay, I figured, why not?

So not really, never?

I have to say, you are a much bigger person than I am.

I mean, after all we've been through, I just, you know, I wish I had a brother to reciprocate.

Hey, if you ever want to go out with Monica, you have my blessing.

And mine.

Hi.

Hi.

What are you doing here?

This is where Ross and I are meeting for our date.

So, what do you think?

I don't like it.

Really?

It's kind of slutty.

It's yours.

Yeah, well, I'm a slut.

Me too.

Hi, Jill.

Hey.

Hi.

Rachel.

Rachel.

You're not at home.

You're right here.

Yeah, I know.

And I bet you thought it would be weird.

But it's not.

Okay.

So, well, I'll have her home by midnight.

Okay.

Why aren't you home yet?

Is someone there?

Oh, yeah, it's me.

Sorry.

What are you doing here?

I'm just looking out your window.

At the view.

What are you guys doing?

We got some vapor rub in some places.

Oh, he brought her back to his apartment.

Who?

Is that your sister?

Oh, she is a slut.

God, Ross is on a date with your sister?

How weird is that?

Oh, my God, look, look.

He's taking off her clothes.

He's taking off her coat.

Oh, this is just terrible.

Oh, no, it's not.

It's not.

It was a first date.

I'm sure that nothing is going to...

Oh, he's going to get some...

Of the glare from the street light out of his apartment.

You know, so he's closed the drapes there so he can have a nice, pleasant conversation with your little sister.

Well, I'm off to bed.

Oh, Ross, hey, hi, how are you?

There you are.

Hey.

I'm gonna get a cup of coffee.

So how was your big date last night?

Uh, it was okay.

It was fun.

Yeah, it was fun?

Great.

So, uh, so did you guys hit it off?

I guess so.

So, uh, so did anything happen?

Because rumor has it you guys shut the drapes.

No, no, nothing happened.

I shut the drapes to show her slides of my favorite fossils.

Oh, slides.

So really nothing happened?

Something could have happened, all right?

She really dug my slides, and she was definitely giving me the vibe.

Was it the

Please don't show me another picture of a trilobite vibe.

Anyway, if she wasn't into me, why would she ask me out again?

She asked you out again?

Yeah, uh-huh.

Tomorrow night, Valentine's Day, the most romantic day of the year.

Who knows what could happen?

I might not be shutting my drapes to show her my slides, if you know what I mean.

Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, I got it, I got it, I got it.

I can't, I can't, I can't.

I'm not going with the you and my sister thing, okay?

I can't, I can't, I can't.

It's just too weird, all right?

I imagine the two of you together,

I just freak out, it freaks me out.

I can't do it, I can't do it.

No, yes, it's okay.

It's okay.

Hey, it's too weird for you.

I won't see her again.

Thank you, I, yeah.

I mean, after tomorrow night.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, please, please.

I can't, I can't do it again.

It's going to freak me out.

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Hey, I'll, I'll tell her tonight,

I can't see her anymore.

Oh, thanks.

Do you want me to call her right now?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.

I mean, come on, that's, that's crazy.

I mean, that's crazy.

So what's, what's going on with you?

What is going on with you?

Well, um, oh,

I may be teaching another class this semester.

Yeah, do it now, call her right now.

Hey.

Hey.

You'll never believe what just happened.

Ross just totally blew me off, and he didn't even tell me why.

Oh, well, you know what, the best thing to do to get over a guy is to start dating someone else.

Oh, oh, there is this great guy you will just love at work named Bob.

He's a real up-and-comer in human resources.

You know, thanks for trying to cheer me up, but I'm not going to date some random guy from your work.

Not random, Bob.

It's probably because I'm not mature enough or smart enough, or maybe he doesn't like the way I dress.

No, that can't be it.

It's really got to be the smart thing.

Uh, I'm so stupid.

I'm just this, like, incredibly pretty stupid girl.

No, honey.

Okay, okay, do you want to know why Ross canceled the date?

Because I asked him to.

You asked him to?

Mm-hmm.

Why?

Because you are my sister, and Ross and I have this huge history.

I don't understand.

You want to go out with Ross?

No.

You don't want him, but you don't want me to have him?

You know, Bob in human resources...

Oh, I cannot believe you did this to me.

You had me doubting how smart I was.

You had me doubting my fashion sense.

Oh, that was not that big a deal.

You just don't date Ross.

There's a million other guys out there.

Hey, you have no right to tell me what to do.

I'm not telling you what to do.

I am telling you what not to do.

Why are you always so jealous of me?

Oh, Jill, this is not about me being jealous of you.

This is about you being a brat, wanting what you can't have.

Can't have?

Excuse me.

The only thing I can't have is dairy.

All right, all right.

Well, you just blew your chances at dating Bob.

Who?

Human resources!

I am jealous of her?

I mean, who does she think she is?

Princess Caroline?

You're jealous of Princess Caroline?

Do I have my own castle?