Jimmy O. Yang & Ronny Chieng Debate the Best and Worst Things Ever | GOAT Talk

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G.O.A.T. Asian Country Walk.
Oh, no, no.
G.O.A.T. Asian Country Walk.
No, man. No, no.
Hi, I'm Jimmy O. Yang.
I'm Ronny Chieng.
And this is G.O.A.T. Talk with Complex.
Okay, here we go.
Question number one.
G.O.A.T. stand-up walk-out song.
Okay, I actually got the perfect one for that.
That need to be a long story to say what it is.
Cedric the Entertainer on Kings...
We don't need to hear it.
Just tell me what the song is.
Let me talk.
Cedric the Entertainer on Kings of Comedy.
He came out to Mystical.
That was a sick song.
If you guys can play it, it's the one that goes...
Wow, wow, wow.
It was sick.
I tried to walk out to that song.
Didn't work for me.
But it worked perfectly for Cedric on Kings of Comedy.
What about you?
Move On Up by Curtis.
Oh, you're just saying that's a general...
I think that's a perfect American show business walk-out song.
Move on up.
Yeah, you use that sometimes.
Yeah, I use it.
I use it all the time.
Self-promotion, this guy.
G.O.A.T. sitcom.
So hot.
I guess you gotta go Seinfeld.
Seinfeld.
You have to.
You have to go Seinfeld.
You have to go Seinfeld.
Everybody knows it.
Everybody knows every episode.
And you can't deny the sheer amount of money that thing generated.
Just by sheer dollars alone, it's the G.O.A.T.
Can't argue with that.
I think, for me, Martin.
No, I appreciate you giving some deep cuts, but you're not seriously arguing that Martin is the G.O.A.T. sitcom.
Well, you said Seinfeld already.
I know.
I know you're trying to just...
I personally...
I know you're trying to make content, probably actually have seen more Martin than Seinfeld.
Martin is not a deep cut.
Yeah, but we're not saying, what have you watched more?
The question is, what did Jimmy watch more?
Well, it's greatest of all time for me.
All right, you're gonna like this.
G.O.A.T. late night show host.
I think the G.O.A.T. would have to be Carsten, but for our generation, I think I have to give it to Letterman.
Because he's the one who I watch the most in Singapore.
I'll go with S.E.L.E.V.E.N.
I mean, just Beatles, you can't beat that.
And he was like the OG.
I grew up with neither of them, so I don't have a personal connection with either of them.
But if you're talking about G.O.A.T., like Ed Sullivan almost made late night happen, you know?
Maybe Ronny Chieng on The Daily Show, if they record that.
If they happen to record that, and it's not lost to the universe, maybe you.
Yeah, G.O.A.T. late night, pot time host.
G.O.A.T. rap lyric to quote.
Maybe slight deep cut, but Fabulous, one of my favourite rappers, he had one line, he said...
I'm fabulous.
Your future look better than your past if you're present with the man.
I just think that is the greatest pickup line of all time.
I've used it and it's not worked.
I'm trying to think right now.
You know which one I've been quoting lately has been...
Hamilton.
Oh, that's good, that's good.
It hits a different crowd.
Sorry, sorry.
Wow, G.O.A.T. comedian.
G.O.A.T. comic?
Man, I know all of them, so it's...
I'm very lucky to meet all my heroes.
Humble brag.
I would go with Bill Burr.
Wow.
In terms of how prolific and how hard he hits and how much he EPs my comedy specials.
Shout out to his boss.
I gotta say Dave Chappelle, man.
I mean, I grew up watching his sketch show and his stand-up and he's like one of the few people that like...
I was always so afraid of me because I don't know...
Like I'm like, he probably doesn't know me or whatever.
And then actually, Netflix is a joke.
I just finally went up and said hi to him and like I was so nervous like a little kid.
And he was like, yo, you've been doing good, man.
You know, and then I like cried on the way here.
Like seriously, like that's how meaningful he is to me.
So I gotta say Dave Chappelle.
Yeah, Dave Chappelle is great.
You should answer this instantly.
G.O.A.T. strip club song.
I used to be a strip club DJ, so I should know this.
I think general all-time G.O.A.T. song,
My Pony by January.
You can't beat that.
It is the strip club anthem.
It's My Pony.
It's Girls, Girls, Girls by Mötley Crüe.
There's just a lot of like classic...
Hamilton, some Hamilton.
A lot of Usher.
Yeah, Hamilton.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Exactly.
You gotta answer that.
I don't know. My mom watches it.
I don't frequent establishments of the old repute.
G.O.A.T. watch.
There you go. You're wearing a nice watch there.
So dumb to say, but the G.O.A.T. watch, you almost have to give it to the actual Paul Newman daytona.
I was gonna say the same.
The actual one that he wore, because that's the watch that started the whole luxury watch.
And I think it's still holds the record.
Yeah, it got sold for like $17 million or $18 million.
It's called After Watch, and it is Paul Newman.
Yeah, G.O.A.T. watch.
I don't think you can argue with that.
I think that's it.
Hey, where's the G.O.A.T. place to stash a body, you moron?
Trunk of a car driving in the desert into a ditch.
Drive the car into a ditch.
Okay, I went to law school in Australia.
One great way to kill someone is you hire, you train an animal to kill that person, but that animal can't be an animal that usually kills people.
Oh, snatch.
In an animal, yeah.
Right, right, right.
Like pig, pig, you gotta...
Pigs or whatever.
Yeah, whatever.
Some snake, whatever you got.
We're clearly capable of killing someone.
Yes.
G.O.A.T. martial arts manoeuvre.
You saw it in the jiu-jitsu.
This guy's insufferable.
Every post is about jiu-jitsu.
Everything is about...
You're like an occult.
I do Brazilian jiu-jitsu.
I do Wing Chun.
Yeah.
The G.O.A.T. martial art move is running away.
It's not worth fighting.
You don't know what's going on.
People are crazy.
Runaway is the G.O.A.T. martial art move of all time.
And any martial arts teacher who doesn't say that, don't train with them, because that person's a psycho.
Ready to make a choke.
Efficient.
Anybody can do it.
You couldn't do it on me.
Most of them...
You couldn't even do it on me.
Come and do it.
Come on.
Come and do it.
Come on.
No, I got...
We got mics and stuff.
I can do it.
I can do it.
Well, you gotta be on the floor, right?
You gotta be on the floor.
And then if I do a double hook like that, like you're out.
You're gonna be out.
What do you mean I can't?
I can't choke you out.
This is the worst real naked choke ever.
I didn't...
I mean, I was about to choke him out.
I didn't want to do it, you know?
Not as easy as it looks.
All right.
G.O.A.T. lesson you learned from your parents.
My dad was always like, why are you always comparing yourself to the worst?
Like, you should compare yourself to the best.
So anytime I feel good about something that I did, he'd be like, yeah, but all these people are idiots.
Like, you should be comparing yourself to the best.
And he always...
I have heard you say that.
I have heard you say that.
And he was right.
You should compare yourself to the best.
Always ask for a deal.
You have to.
Like, you can't...
Like, even if you go to Nordstrom, you gotta ask for a discount.
They might give it to you.
You go to a hotel and ask for an upgrade, you know?
You gotta just ask.
I hate that shit, by the way.
Yeah.
It's a lot of stress, but you gotta ask.
No, my parents did that, so I actually rebelled, and now I never ask for discounts.
I pay more.
You pay full price?
You're like, let me tip you, even though...
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
In front of my mom, I'll do that.
Just to irritate her.
It's very white of you.
Hey, was this $2?
This is $5.
Very white.
Yeah.
All right, go with Asian celebrity.
Oof, this is tough.
You don't want to say the wrong answer.
I don't want to say the wrong answer because I know these guys as well, so it's...
Okay.
So you might as well say someone that's like, maybe we've never met.
Steven Chow.
Oh, man.
How are you gonna take that from me?
That's my Hong Kong hero, Steven Chow, man.
That's dirty right there.
That's dirty right there.
We can't leave this conversation without saying Bruce Lee.
He was such a trailblazer before his time.
It's like Anna May Wong, Bruce Lee.
I'm gonna go with Bruce Lee.
Shout out, Bruce Lee.
You're the girl.
Speed round.
Speed round.
Go to Asian country.
Oh no, no.
Go to Asian country.
No, man.
No, no.
I'm working on...
Yeah, I'm trying to work on this bit about how you can rank Asian countries by whether or not you would agree to go on a rollercoaster in that country.
In that country, yeah.
All right, what's your go-to?
Oh my god.
Dude, I don't wanna...
Just say it.
Just say what everybody knows you're gonna f***ing say.
I don't wanna.
Say the country.
Say it for the...
Well, since I don't wanna promote my own town or whatever,
I'm just gonna say Japan.
I'm just gonna say Japan.
It's like the future.
What a cop-out.
They have a high-speed rail.
Dude, any white person can say Japan.
Okay, you answer.
Malaysia truly is...
Asia.
You don't mean it.
That's his hometown.
What do you mean?
The best food in the world.
Your entire Instagram is dedicated on hating on Malaysian, Singaporean people.
No, I never hate on Malaysia.
Just Singaporeans?
And Australians.
Okay, well, that's okay.
Go Chinatown.
Go Chinatown.
Go New York City, Chinatown.
I think it's the GOAT.
It's my home Chinatown, I guess.
Great food, great jewelry.
Great food, lots of good basketball.
It's got a good vibe.
There's always something going on there.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
You know?
It's active.
Very active.
Yeah, I gotta shout out to LA Chinatown.
That's where I grew up.
And of course, we shot our show, Interior Chinatown.
Oh, yeah.
And some of that Chinatown.
And I was also Chinese teenager number one on a show that was shot in that Chinatown.
On Chloe Bennet's show.
Marvel agent.
She was like 10 years old.
You played a teenager?
Yeah, that was 10 years ago, man.
You played a teenager?
I can still play a teenager.
Excuse me, Uncle Ronnie.
You're playing a teenager's dead body right now.
Yeah, right.
Yeah.
GOAT NFL player.
Yeah, this is your...
Wow.
Think American questions here.
What's your favorite?
It's gotta be Brady.
I mean, he has to go.
It's like unarguable.
Like the amount of ranks.
He's such a winner.
Two different teams.
Yeah, I agree.
Tom Brady, he has shown America what you need to do to be healthy and look good into your 40s.
And we know what we have to do now.
And no one wants to do it.
Who would rather do Ozempic?
It's much easier.
GOAT conspiracy theory.
Birds aren't real.
Birds aren't real was the greatest conspiracy theory of all time.
And like people actually believed in it.
There's like tens of thousands of followers.
It's so insane.
Who think birds aren't real?
Do you know that?
No.
You host The Daily Show.
How do you not know this?
Because we don't fucking...
Birds are not real is a huge phenomenon.
This group, I think in New York, started saying that pigeons are actually just monitoring you.
And they're like government devices.
They aren't real animals.
And you didn't believe this, right?
Or you were into it for a bit?
I started it, yeah.
I was the birds aren't real guy.
I'm gonna go in line with the theme of Asian GOAT talk.
MSG is bad for you.
It's probably one of the GOAT conspiracy theories.
Because MSG is actually an inert substance, according to my doctor sister.
Medical doctor sister.
And it's actually made from like seaweed or something.
So it's an organic source.
And so everyone who thinks that MSG is bad, it's actually...
It actually has a kind of racist origins in it.
Look it up.
It's actually inert.
Look up inert.
Eat more MSG.
GOAT rapper.
Let's just go with vanilla ice.
Nice.
Watch the engagements building up.
Vanilla ice.
I gotta say Tupac.
Complex.
You're welcome.
Tupac.
And I think...
Wow, how original.
How original.
I'm sorry, vanilla ice.
I'm sorry.
Bring the heat.
Worst purchase you've made.
You got a lot, man.
I've been to your house.
I live like a fucking child.
Worst purchase.
Randomly point to anything in your house.
How about that arcade machine?
You love it.
You play it.
You're the only one that comes and plays it.
Don't even talk shit.
How about the 20 Yao Ming...
That was a bad purchase.
Explain what it is.
Okay, so during the pandemic, people are going crazy about sports cars.
So I'm like, there's only one athlete
I really care about, which is Yao Ming.
So I bought all...
Every single Yao Ming rookie card,
PSA 10, PSA 9 graded.
I have a plaque of like nine rookie cards.
They've gone down maybe 90% in value right now.
But after this video, you guys go buy it on eBay.
You know, I'll sell you a couple and then maybe we'll make it go back up.
That was the worst.
You're so right.
The worst purchase I probably did was just before the pandemic,
I bought like a wall garden.
Hydroponic wall garden.
Oh no.
Oh, fuck.
I don't see you keeping anything.
Nothing was leaving.
Worst thing about America.
Oh, this is your set, right?
Because this country is so great at so many things, they rarely have perspective on how they could be better by looking outside of America.
And because people here have never seen things done better.
So they don't know how good things could have been.
The worst thing about America I think is...
Wow.
I think it just seems like nobody can agree on anything, you know?
Right now.
Nobody can agree with anything, whether it's politics, whether it's food, whether it's goat talk, whether it's whatever.
Everything always turns into an argument.
You don't know how many times
I've heard a LeBron James versus Michael Jordan argument.
That's good.
Worst comedian of all time.
What the fuck?
Wow.
Are we trying to stop beefs here?
You know who the worst comedian of all time is when someone meets a comedian and they think they want to be funny.
That fucking guy is the worst comedian of all time.
I hate that dude comes up, and he's like,
Oh, yo, you're a comedian, bro?
Oh, shit.
It's a street joke.
Worst joke of all time.
You've told.
You've told.
The worst joke and the greatest joke I've ever told was my first joke, I think.
I went out for dinner with a girl last night.
We played footsie.
I won.
Because I'm very competitive with my sister.
Hey, that's a good joke.
That's a good joke.
That's a good joke.
Might be the worst thing I've ever written.
I always have SportsCenter on the TV, okay?
Even if I'm doing anything.
So even when I'm watching porn on my computer, you know, I have SportsCenter on the TV.
I was like about to come, and then Michael Vick hit like a really sick highlight.
So then I busted to Michael Vick.
That was my worst joke of all time.
Okay, we learned nothing, and I disagree with everything you said.
Exactly.