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  • How do you help somebody who has two conflicting voices, both are equally valid, but they're paralyzed just with pure indecision?

  • Yeah, so one of my life mantras that saves my butt every single day of the week is this idea that clarity comes from engagement, not thought.

  • So you can be sitting on your couch and wrestling with two options, whether it's which business should I start?

  • Should I stay in this relationship or not?

  • Should I go back to school or should I stay in this job?

  • There's a million things that all of us kind of struggle with each and every day.

  • And one of the things that's helped me, and I remember it was actually tied back to when I was considering whether or not to go for some type of career in dance.

  • Now, I never had any formal dance training.

  • My dance experience really was me moonwalking across my mom's linoleum floor in my white socks to like Michael Jackson.

  • That's as far as the dance training I had, but I love to dance.

  • And I didn't wanna just focus on one specific thing, and I loved spirituality, I loved business, I loved marketing, I loved personal development, but I also loved fitness and I also loved dance.

  • And so I was having a hard time reconciling what to call myself, what to focus on.

  • It was really a confusing time in my life.

  • And it was really frustrating because I had a lot of drive and I wanted to help people and I wanted to make a difference, but I didn't and I couldn't figure out how I fit into society.

  • So this idea of dance just didn't leave me alone.

  • And I remember just saying to myself, if I don't actually go and take a class, how am I gonna know?

  • And so I went and I took my first ever professional dance class at Broadway Dance Center.

  • And getting into that class, I was terrified because in the dance world, unfortunately, if you're 25 years old, in the hip hop world, you're kind of over the hill, which is disgusting to say.

  • You were the old woman in the room.

  • You were the old, and that's crazy.

  • That is insane to say, and it's not true everywhere, but I remember going into that class and it was like the warmup section and I just sat down on this wooden floor and I moved myself in the back because I was terrified that I would make people trip or that people would laugh at me.

  • And I just sat on the floor and the music came on and I started crying because it felt so right.

  • And I'm like, why have I tortured myself for like three years going like, could I dance, should I dance, should I try to dance?

  • I mean, I tortured myself for years about that and was miserable.

  • And so this idea of clarity comes from engagement, not thought.

  • If you're wrestling with something, do anything you can to move towards the thing that you think you want.

  • You know, if you're not sure if you should stay in a relationship, it's like, give that relationship everything you can.

  • Go get some couples therapy.

  • Talk to somebody.

  • Say, I want to work on this.

  • If it's a career that you might want to investigate or you might want to move towards, like go take a class, intern.

  • Get yourself embedded in that field somehow to test it because your body has a truth.

  • It has a natural knowing that you can never access through your mind alone.

  • And I think that once you engage with your body and you actually take action, there is this flood of intelligence that you have access to that you cannot get any other way. 100%.

  • And that's what makes that such a great philosophy.

  • It doesn't matter how that story plays out.

  • It only matters at the end of that story, you got a visceral answer.

  • You got a visceral answer and now you can stop torturing yourself and you can go in that other direction or the other thing that you want to do and feel more confidence and go for it.

  • It works like magic every single time.

  • And some of the best things that you can do is actually get that know.

  • Like if you think something is so great and so magical that you actually take a step towards it and you get that body knowing or some kind of feedback like, oh, this is disgusting.

  • I don't want to do this as a business.

  • This is a hobby.

  • This should just stay fun.

  • There's so many different ways.

  • But to get that answer, you don't have to journal about it.

  • You don't have to meditate on it for four weeks.

  • You'll know real fast.

How do you help somebody who has two conflicting voices, both are equally valid, but they're paralyzed just with pure indecision?

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