Conor Beaton here, and today we're going to be talking about three mental health issues that men generally struggle with more than women.

我是康納-比頓，今天我們要討論的是男性通常比女性更容易患上的三種心理健康問題。

Now, I don't have a peer-reviewed research paper to back this up.

現在，我沒有同行評審的研究論文來證明這一點。

This is based off of 10,000, 15,000 plus hours of working with men over the last decade.

這是根據過去十年中與男性一起工作的 10,000 至 15,000 多個小時得出的結論。

And so we're going to dive in because I find that these three things are things that men are struggling with that oftentimes either go, we can call it undiagnosed or unrecognized within men.

是以，我們將深入探討，因為我發現這三件事都是男人們經常糾結的事情，我們可以稱之為 "未診斷 "或 "未被承認"。

And I'm going to try and speak to how you can move through each one of these.

我將試著談談如何逐一解決這些問題。

So the first one that I want to talk about is dysthymia.

我想談的第一個問題是癔症。

This is a persistent, mild form of depression.

這是一種持續性的輕度抑鬱症。

It's kind of like a low-grade depression that doesn't really lift.

這有點像低級抑鬱症，無法真正解除。

And it's not so bad that it's debilitating.

而且還不至於讓人崩潰。

I kind of call it functional depression.

我稱之為功能性抑鬱症。

Like a guy is always a little sad.

就像一個人總是有點悲傷。

He's kind of got like a little bit of cloud of Eeyore around him, but he still does life.

他的周圍有點像屹立的雲朵，但他仍然在生活。

You know, he's still social.

你知道，他還在社交。

He's still out doing things.

他還在外面做事。

You know, you still go to the gym a couple of times a week or, you know, you still function, right?

你知道，你仍然每週去幾次健身房，或者，你知道，你仍然能正常工作，對嗎？

It's kind of like a low-grade functioning alcoholic.

這有點像低度功能性酒精中毒。

It's like you're not full-blown, you're not missing work, you're not, you know, so bad that, you know, people are questioning you about whether or not you should have that next Jack Daniels.

這就好比你還沒有完全崩潰，你還沒有曠工，你還沒有糟糕到人們質疑你是否應該喝下一杯傑克-丹尼爾的地步。

It's just kind of like low-grade.

只是有點像低檔貨。

And the reason why I bring this one up and share it first is that this is the experience that many men have that doesn't get addressed in therapy often.

我之所以把這個問題提出來，並首先與大家分享，是因為這是很多男性都有的經歷，但在治療中卻不常被提及。

And this is the experience that many men have because they feel a kind of uselessness in their life.

這也是許多男人的經歷，因為他們覺得自己的生活一無是處。

They're like, I don't really feel like I have much going for me.

他們會說，我覺得自己沒什麼出息。

I don't really feel like I have direction.

我覺得自己沒有方向。

I don't really feel like I have really solid connections.

我並不覺得自己有什麼可靠的關係。

And so there's kind of like this consistent and persistent low-grade sadness and cloud and loneliness that they live inside of and they can't really shake.

是以，他們的內心就像有一種持續存在的低級悲傷、陰雲和孤獨，揮之不去。

It's like, I think it was Linus from Snoopy, right?

就像，我想是史努比裡的萊納斯，對嗎？

The one with the blanket and had like the cloud around him and he was sort of like always following him around.

那個蓋著毯子、身邊有云朵的人，好像總是跟著他。

That was more like traditional depression.

那更像是傳統的抑鬱症。

But this is kind of like a low-grade depression.

但這有點像低級抑鬱症。

Now there's a couple of ways to deal with this consistent and persistent low-grade depression.

現在，有幾種方法可以應對這種持續、頑固的低度抑鬱。

Number one, working out and meditation.

第一，鍛鍊和冥想。

In the UK, they prescribe meditation as a prescription for depression.

在英國，他們將冥想作為治療抑鬱症的處方。

It has been clinically shown to be as effective, if not more effective than a lot of SSRIs that are on the market.

臨床顯示，它與市場上的許多 SSRIs 一樣有效，甚至更有效。

Working out, same thing.

健身，也是一樣。

It has been clinically shown to improve your self-perception, your sense of self-worth.

臨床顯示，它能改善你的自我認知和自我價值感。

It can really help to restore some of the challenges that you're feeling internally.

它能真正幫助你恢復內心的一些挑戰。

So for a lot of men that are struggling with dysthymia, what I've noticed is that oftentimes they are very inconsistent.

是以，對於很多與癔症作鬥爭的男性來說，我注意到的是，他們的行為常常很不一致。

The low-grade depression is the main consistent thing that they have in their life.

低度抑鬱是他們生活中最主要的一致問題。

They're not consistently working out.

他們沒有堅持鍛鍊。

They're not consistently meditating.

他們沒有堅持冥想。

They're not consistently doing breath work.

他們沒有堅持做呼吸工作。

They don't have a very sort of robust or rigorous quality of ritual or routine in their life.

在他們的生活中，沒有一種非常健全或嚴謹的儀式或例行公事。

And usually when we are lacking that type of rigorous routine, something will take its place.

通常情況下，當我們缺乏這種嚴格的例行公事時，就會有一些東西取而代之。

And this is usually what takes its place.

而這通常就是取而代之的東西。

Now that can also be contributed by unhealed, undealt with childhood trauma, abuse, abandonment, neglect, those types of things.

這也可能是因為童年的創傷、虐待、遺棄、忽視等未得到治癒和處理。

So I don't want to discredit those things.

是以，我不想詆譭這些事情。

They can absolutely contribute to dysthymia.

它們絕對會導致癔症。

But for a lot of men, what I've noticed is that they are lacking in this daily ritual of meeting their edge, of pushing themselves in some way, shape, or form that feels good.

但我注意到，對於很多男人來說，他們缺少的是這種滿足自己優勢的日常儀式，缺少的是以某種感覺良好的方式、形狀或形式推動自己。

It's like doing a hard thing that feels good, doing a hard thing that leaves you respecting yourself a little bit more on a consistent, regular basis.

這就像做一件艱苦的事情，感覺很好，做一件艱苦的事情，讓你持續、定期地更加尊重自己。

So that's dysthymia.

這就是癔症。

That's how I would suggest starting to address it.

我建議從這個角度入手解決這個問題。

Obviously working with a therapist or a psychologist or a really skilled coach can also serve you.

顯然，與治療師、心理學家或真正熟練的教練一起工作也能為你服務。

The next one, alexithymia.

下一個是lexithymia。

Alexithymia is the inability to describe or even recognize and acknowledge your own emotions.

情緒失調症是指無法描述甚至識別和承認自己的情緒。

Now I've worked with men that have a little bit of a spectrum on this one.

我曾與一些男人共事過，他們在這個問題上有一些分歧。

So I've noticed that there's varying degrees of alexithymia.

所以我注意到有不同程度的自閉症。

Some men, you know, they struggle to acknowledge or recognize any emotion that isn't anger.

有些男人，你知道的，他們很難承認或識別任何不是憤怒的情緒。

Other men can recognize anger and happiness and sadness, and that's sort of the three emotions that they can recognize.

其他人能識別憤怒、快樂和悲傷，這就是他們能識別的三種情緒。

And other men are just completely disconnected whatsoever.

而其他男人則完全沒有任何聯繫。

There's just almost no ability to recognize, articulate, or even describe what you feel.

你幾乎無法認識、表達甚至描述自己的感受。

So there's kind of an awareness sometimes of like, yeah, I think I feel happy, or yeah, I think I feel sad.

是以，有時我們會意識到，是的，我覺得我很快樂，或者是的，我覺得我很悲傷。

But there's no ability to describe what that's like from a physiological standpoint.

但從生理角度來說，我們無法描述這種感覺。

So being able to say, oh yeah, when I get sad, I feel like something's squeezing in my diaphragm and all of a sudden it's like a tube of toothpaste being squeezed and all of a sudden tears are coming out of my eyes.

是以，我可以說，哦，是的，當我傷心的時候，我感覺我的橫膈膜被什麼東西擠壓著，突然間就像一管牙膏被擠壓著，眼淚一下子就從我的眼睛裡流出來了。

Or yeah, when I get angry, it feels like this big ball of fire, like the sun gets turned on in my chest and all of a sudden all of this energy is emanating, you know, down to my belly, out my arms, up into my head.

是的，當我生氣時，感覺就像一個大火球，就像我胸口的太陽被打開了，突然間，所有的能量都噴湧而出，你知道，向下噴到我的腹部，向外噴到我的手臂，向上噴到我的頭部。

Usually most men, when they really sit with it, they can articulate what they're feeling and where that feeling, that emotion is coming from.

通常情況下，大多數男人在真正靜下心來的時候，都能清楚地表達出自己的感受，以及這種感受和情緒的來源。

They can describe some of the thoughts that coincide with it, some of the sensations that coincide with it.

他們可以描述與之相吻合的一些想法，以及與之相吻合的一些感覺。

And so, alexithymia can be challenging because you don't have access to the personal data of what you are feeling, however, you will be acting and responding oftentimes from that emotion.

是以，自閉症可能具有挑戰性，因為你無法獲得個人數據，瞭解自己的感受，但是，你往往會根據這種情緒採取行動和做出反應。

So this is kind of the tricky thing with alexithymia.

這就是亞歷山大症的棘手之處。

For a lot of guys, they're unaware of what they're feeling, they're not able to describe what they're feeling, but if you're in a conversation with them and they start to get a little agitated or a little elevated or a little closed down, they will respond from that anger or that grief or whatever it is, but they won't be able to describe or understand it.

對於很多人來說，他們不知道自己在感受什麼，他們無法描述自己的感受，但如果你在與他們交談時，他們開始變得有點激動、有點高漲或有點封閉，他們就會從憤怒、悲傷或其他什麼情緒中做出反應，但他們無法描述或理解。

So if you are somebody that struggles or thinks that you struggle with alexithymia, I would really encourage you to work with a professional.

是以，如果你有或認為自己有條件反射症，我真的鼓勵你與專業人士合作。

They will be able to help you slow down your process, connect to the body, be able to put some, sometimes some language around it, but sometimes what I've found in working with men that have alexithymia is that it's almost not necessary to get into the verbal of it.

他們能夠幫助你放慢過程，與身體建立聯繫，能夠用一些語言來表達，但有時我在與有條件反射症的男性一起工作時發現，幾乎沒有必要對其進行口頭描述。

It's more necessary to just connect the sensation of what you are feeling in your body.

更有必要的是，把你身體的感覺聯繫起來。

The last piece is derealization, derealization, and alexithymia and derealization that I'm oftentimes a byproduct of trauma, of PTSD, of having some pretty sometimes severe, not always severe, but sometimes severe adverse events that have happened in your life, whether that was acute or ongoing.

最後一塊是 "去理想化"、"去現實化"、"情感淡漠 "和 "去現實化"，它們往往是創傷、創傷後應激障礙、有時是嚴重的（不一定是嚴重的）但有時是嚴重的不良事件的副產品，無論這些事件是急性的還是持續性的。

So derealization is a feeling that your surroundings or your experience aren't real, and this can be very jarring.

是以，"去現實化 "是一種感覺，即你覺得周圍的環境或你的經歷並不真實，這可能會非常刺耳。

This can be very disconcerting, and men that have severe depression or severe anxiety can have derealization.

這可能會讓人非常不安，患有嚴重抑鬱症或嚴重焦慮症的男性可能會出現 "去理想化 "現象。

Oftentimes guys that have done a lot of drugs and maybe had a couple bad experiences will experience derealization, and it can be wildly, wildly, wildly unnerving.

通常情況下，吸食過大量毒品並有過幾次不愉快經歷的人都會經歷 "去理想化"，這可能會讓人感到非常、非常、非常不安。

It can really be a brutal experience, and what I found is that generally speaking, more men than women seem to struggle with derealization.

這確實是一種殘酷的經歷，而且我發現，一般來說，男性似乎比女性更容易在 "去理想化 "的問題上掙扎。

My opinion on that is that we struggle, men struggle with derealization more than women because men, we as men, are conditioned to disconnect from our emotions more, and derealization is the ultimate disconnection.

我對此的看法是，我們都在掙扎，男性比女性更容易在 "去現實化 "的問題上掙扎，因為男性，我們作為男性，有條件更多地與我們的情感脫節，而 "去現實化 "是最終的脫節。

It's like a form of disassociation, except you're not checking out from your consciousness per se.

這就像是一種 "脫離"（disassociation），只不過你並沒有從你的意識中 "退出 "而已。

You're not disconnecting from a conversation.

你並沒有中斷對話。

It's that reality itself kind of becomes two-dimensional, opaque, flat, and you find yourself really questioning whether what you're seeing, thinking, hearing, experiencing is real, and that can be brutal.

現實本身變成了二維的、不透明的、平面的，你會發現自己真的在懷疑自己看到的、想到的、聽到的、經歷的一切是否真實，而這可能是殘酷的。

If you struggle with this, please reach out to somebody that knows how to work with it and go work with them immediately.

如果你有這方面的困擾，請聯繫知道如何解決這個問題的人，並立即與他們合作。

Generally, again, this is a byproduct of some type of PTSD, some type of trauma that has happened that is unresolved and the psyche is trying to work it out.

一般來說，這也是某種創傷後應激障礙的副產品，是某種已經發生但尚未解決的創傷，心理正在試圖解決它。

Derealization is also something that can happen when your physical and emotional body is having such an intense experience that it's almost like it tries to eject you, like your awareness or your consciousness, out of that moment, right?

當你的身體和情感經歷瞭如此強烈的體驗，幾乎就像它試圖將你，比如你的意識或你的意識，從那一刻彈射出去時，"去意識化 "也會發生，對嗎？

So you might be having such crippling and overwhelming anxiety, and hopefully you don't mind me talking about this because for some people, like even just listening to it can be activating, so I want to be mindful of that, but you might be experiencing really intense anxiety, and when that's not attended to or I want to say dealt with, but when it's not attended to properly, what can happen is it can build to the point where derealization starts to take place, and so it can be a very extreme form of anxiety and of PTSD.

所以，你可能會有這樣的殘缺和壓倒性的焦慮，希望你不要介意我談論這個，因為對某些人來說，即使只是聽它也會被激活，所以我想注意這一點，但你可能正在經歷非常強烈的焦慮，當這種焦慮沒有得到關注，或者我想說的是處理，但當它沒有得到適當的關注時，可能發生的事情是，它可以建立到開始發生脫髓鞘的地步，所以它可以是一種非常極端的焦慮和創傷後應激障礙的形式。

So if you're struggling with derealization, a couple of things can help.

是以，如果你正在與 "去理想化 "作鬥爭，有幾件事可以幫助你。

If you are in a relationship, having a conversation with somebody that is in on the game of what's happening inside of you, and generally what I found for a lot of guys is that when that derealization starts to happen, it's usually because some really big amount of grief underneath the surface is trying to come up, almost like a water pressure, right, where you see those geysers that shoot water way up into the sky.

如果你在一段關係中，與某人進行了一次對話，而對方也參與了你內心發生的事情，一般來說，我對很多人的發現是，當 "去現實化 "開始發生時，通常是因為表面下的一些非常大的悲傷想要湧現出來，就像水壓一樣，對吧，你會看到那些噴泉把水射向天空。

Derealization is almost like there's this pressure building underneath the surface of the psyche that a man's not aware of, and all of this grief is building pressure and building pressure, and it's trying to come out, but it doesn't have a vent out, and so what's happening is he's experiencing anxiety, anxiousness, worry, panic, frustration, paranoia, that kind of stuff, but he doesn't realize that underneath that is this massive pressure of grief that's trying to emerge, and when you start to tell somebody what you're experiencing and you let them in on the game, hey, I'm experiencing this, what can happen is that the dam can break, and if you trust and respect and feel safe with that person, then the grief has a place to come out.

"去現實化 "幾乎就像一個人沒有意識到的 心理表面下的壓力在不斷增加 所有的悲傷都在不斷增加壓力當你開始告訴別人你正在經歷的事情，並讓他們參與進來，嘿，我正在經歷這些，可能發生的事情是，堤壩可能會被打破，如果你信任和尊重那個人，並與他在一起感到安全，那麼悲傷就會有一個發洩的地方。

Very common in men that I've worked with that have had trauma in their childhood, have some form of PTSD, whether it's from being in the military, that when they're experiencing depersonalization or derealization, that grief has needed a place to come out, but he hasn't allowed it to, and so the psyche or the mind's only way to deal with it is by checking out so fully and completely that it's almost like you exit from reality, that you try and exit from the three-dimensional plane in which you exist, so talk to somebody, tell them what's going on inside of you, share what you're experiencing, and let yourself maybe start to feel and connect to what's underneath the surface.

在我工作過的男人中，童年受過創傷、有某種形式的創傷後應激障礙的人很常見，不管是在軍隊中，當他們經歷人格解體或去人格化時，悲傷需要一個地方來發洩，但他不允許這樣做、是以，心理或思想處理它的唯一方法就是完全徹底地退出，這幾乎就像你退出現實，你試圖退出你所存在的三維平面，所以與人交談，告訴他們你內心的想法，分享你的經歷，讓自己開始感受和連接到表面之下的東西。

For a lot of men that I've worked with, when that derealization happens and then they communicate to somebody that they trust, whether it's a therapist, a psychologist, a coach, a wife, girlfriend, a best friend, a partner, a husband, a boyfriend, et cetera, and all of that emotion can come up, then the whole thing can settle back in.

對於很多與我共事過的男性來說，當他們出現這種 "去理想化 "的情況時，他們會與自己信任的人交流，無論是治療師、心理學家、教練、妻子、女友、閨蜜、伴侶、丈夫、男友等等，所有的情緒都會湧現出來，然後整個事情又會恢復平靜。

So hopefully that gives you some context.

希望這能給你提供一些背景資訊。

I'm like, I'm watching as a whole herd of turkeys, wild turkeys walk past in my backyard.

我正看著一大群火雞，野生火雞從我家後院走過。

I wish I could show them to you, but so hopefully that lands with you.

我希望能給你們看看，但願你們能喜歡。

These three things are really big things that a lot of men deal with that I don't think our modern therapeutic industry are supporting men with.

這三件事是很多男人都要面對的大事，但我認為我們的現代治療行業並沒有為男人提供支持。

If you're one of the men that struggles with these things and you want to learn more about any of them and you're watching this on YouTube or you follow me on Instagram, please send me a message, comment, and let me know how I can support you.

如果你也有這些困擾，如果你想了解更多，如果你正在 YouTube 上觀看或在 Instagram 上關注我，請給我發資訊或評論，讓我知道如何為你提供支持。

If there's one of these that you want me to go deeper into, give you more tools and resources on, I would love to do so.

如果你想讓我深入探討其中的某一項，為你提供更多的工具和資源，我非常樂意。

All right, until next time, thank you very much for tuning in.

好了，下次再見，感謝您的收聽。

Don't forget to subscribe to the channel.

別忘了訂閱頻道。

Don't forget to man it forward to somebody that you know might need to hear this.

別忘了把它轉發給你知道的可能需要聽到它的人。

Until next time, Conor Beaton signing off.

下次再見，康納-比頓（Conor Beaton）。