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  • Cheese.

  • Oh my God, you guys are so Asian right now.

  • I'm gonna be Asian too.

  • So where are you from?

  • I'm from Texas.

  • No, I mean like where are your parents from?

  • You know, you're pretty tall for an Asian.

  • Oh, they're from Korea.

  • Where are your parents from?

  • Michigan.

  • No, where are your parents' ancestors from?

  • I don't know, like Europe?

  • I just wanted to introduce you to Eugene over here.

  • Eugene, say hi to Stacy.

  • Hi Stacy.

  • Yeah, well Stacy's really into Asian guys so I figured it'd be a nice...

  • It is so nice to finally meet your girlfriend!

  • Yeah, so me and my friend were at 99 Ranch and...

  • What's 99 Ranch?

  • Actually, I'm his sister.

  • Yeah, this is my girlfriend.

  • You don't know what 99 Ranch is?

  • Oh, it's that new bar, right?

  • Oh, such a banana.

  • So anyways, yeah.

  • Um, I don't speak Mandarin, do you?

  • No, sorry.

  • So you're Chinese.

  • Taiwanese, actually.

  • You speak Cantonese.

  • Mandarin.

  • You know my cousin's wife is Oriental.

  • Ah, so she's a rug.

  • Are you North or South Korean?

  • South.

  • How can you tell?

  • Because I'm not trapped in North Korea.

  • No, she's from the Orient.

  • The Orient, ah, so we're in the 1950's right now.

  • I'd be the Red Ranger.

  • I'd be the Blue Ranger.

  • You're the Yellow Ranger!

  • How do I change this setting?

  • Are you serious?

  • Yeah, I just got this phone.

  • You're like a bad Asian.

  • So my mom was like (with Korean accent) "Eugene"

  • "Why are you so skinny?"

  • You can say that?

  • That feels like a little bit racist.

  • I mean it's...

  • Were your parents upset that you wanted to go into entertainment?

  • Of course! 'Cause I'm Asian you think that my parents want me to be a doctor or a lawyer or engineer.

  • OK, that's like a little racist, but it's cool.

  • So she was like (with Korean accent) "Oh, Eugene..."

  • No, no, you can't do it though.

  • Oh, OK, fair.

  • Oh, I wasn't trying to be offensive, it's good that they're cool with it, though.

  • Nah, they wanted me to be a doctor.

  • Take a selfie with me.

  • Yeah Mom, that was my new girlfriend.

  • Uh no, she's not Korean.

  • I'm so glad I have minority friends.

  • All my pictures are with White people.

  • Uh, you know, technically Asians are the majority.

  • There are literally billions of us in the world.

  • Oh, OK, smile!

  • Oh my God, I love that new HBO show.

  • It's so diverse.

  • Yeah, there are no Asians on it.

  • Hey Eugene, what's 28 times 72?

  • Yeah, but there are two Black people!

  • And an Asian receptionist.

  • I don't know, it's like 1,500.

  • OK, thanks.

  • Are we all in the frame?

  • Yeah, you're on, you're all in.

  • I just had this thought.

  • If we had a baby together,

  • it would be the most beautiful half-Asian baby in the entire world.

  • Right?

  • Yes, definitely.

  • It would totally be half Asian.

  • Dude, in general half-Asian people are the most beautiful.

  • Oh my God, I had the best pho last night.

  • You mean pho.

  • Yeah, pho.

  • Hey Eugene, I saw your "Awkward Moments Only Asians Understand" vid.

  • As an Indian, where was the rest of Asia?

  • I went with my girlfriend Tammy Nguyen, do you know her?

  • Nguyen?

  • I don't know, I think probably around eight o'clock.

  • So, you might wanna think about that next time you label something Asian.

  • Gah, this is awkward.

  • Is that your brother?

  • What?

  • It's all on you.

  • It's all on your cow!

  • Down Bastian!

  • I am the great, stolen Dragon!

  • Yup, you are.

Cheese.

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