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  • Lizzie: In my last video, some of you thought I went a little dramatic on William Darcy.

  • I know it may have seemed a bit harsh. In this video, I am going to tell you a story. A story of a wedding.

  • A painful wedding. Where a man and a woman were forced to dance together

  • because of some stupid binding tradition that should be banned for all time.

  • So if you haven't guessed it yet, yeah, I caught the bouquet.

  • And guess what stuck up, pompous prick caught the garter? Yeah.

  • My name is Lizzie Bennet and this is the story of the most awkward dance EVER.

  • "The Most Awkward Dance Ever" Written by Bernie Su

  • So you're all probably wondering, how did this ridiculous set of circumstances happen?

  • Oh trust me, I am too.

  • I was standing against the wall, minding my own business.

  • Well, really I was watching Bing and Jane dance song after song.

  • And then watching my mom pump her fist so that everyone else in the world knew of her unbridled success.

  • Lizzie, who's that dancing with Bing Lee, the rich new neighbor who's studying to be a doctor?

  • For the tenth time, it's your eldest, most perfect daughter, Jane.

  • This is the happiest day of my life!

  • What about the day you married dad? Or the days your three daughters were born?

  • Nope! It's today!

  • Now, see, at that point? I was okay.

  • I mean, not totally thrilled, but okay. But then came time for the bouquet toss.

  • Or as it is to my mother, her last, best hope to match off one of her single, pathetic daughters.

  • I didn't so much catch it as prevent it from smashing into my face.

  • But I figured my mom probably paid off Ellen Gibson to throw it directly at me.

  • I wonder how much my misery is worth to my mother.

  • So anyway, fast-forward. Darcy's standing as far away from the clump of bachelors as possible.

  • To allow for minimal chance of interaction with other humans.

  • Yet somehow, mustered the hospitality to catch the garter.

  • After it hit him in the chest.

  • So there we were. Forcing smiles. For the dog and stuck-up pony show.

  • Or should that be the stuck-up dog and pony show?

  • But that Darcywhat a charmer!

  • Stone. Freaking. Statue.

  • Like, can't you just imagine fake happiness and force a smile?

  • So there's me, being the lady, following his lead.

  • More like swaying to his sway. It was like he was trying to hear the crickets in the next county.

  • And when I asked him if he actually liked it here in town?

  • Not especially.

  • Do you enjoy dancing?

  • Not if I can help it.

  • Glad to rock your world, there, Darcy.

  • So the dance ends. I swayed, he snobbed. And he actually thanked me for the dance.

  • So then I head back to my wall, where Charlotte is waiting.

  • I give her the skinny, we laugh, and then we head outside. And that's when I hear him talking to Bing.

  • You're dancing with the only tolerable girl in the room, so stop wasting your time with me.

  • Sure, Lizzie's decent enough, but why would I continue to dance with her when no one else does?

  • I mean it's-- who is he to-- I mean, I'm not even going to give him the satisfaction.

  • Well, Mister Darcy, I hope it's not too lonely on the pedestal you've put yourself on.

  • It's safe to say, I like you even less than you like me.

  • Lizzie Bennet. Decent enough.

Lizzie: In my last video, some of you thought I went a little dramatic on William Darcy.

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