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  • [theme music]

  • -All I'm saying is we've hit a small bump in the road.

  • -Vlad's not a bump, he's a roadblock.

  • I can't take over if he's alive.

  • -Maybe the slayers will come back and attack him.

  • -I am not pinning my hopes to a "maybe"!

  • Go and grab all the weapons you can find.

  • -You want to take him down tonight?

  • -He'll be dust by dawn.

  • THE COUNT: Stop faffing!

  • Hurry up, Renfield.

  • -Yes, Master.

  • Yeah, right.

  • Right.

  • -Pack this.

  • Leave that.

  • Burn these.

  • Sell those.

  • Who's this?

  • -Don't know.

  • -Well, I'm sorry, but you didn't make the cut.

  • Bon voyage!

  • -We're staying.

  • -The vultures are circling.

  • It's time to take you off the menu!

  • We may have disabled their weapon,

  • but the slayers know our location--

  • -I can handle the slayers.

  • -And what about Ingrid, mm?

  • -She and her gang won't be a problem.

  • I'll unleash the power of the "Praedictum Impaver"

  • or I'll be strong enough to control all vampires.

  • -You need living blood to reveal the text,

  • but you won't hurt breathers!

  • No blood, no power.

  • Get packing.

  • -There's no choice.

  • I'll have to get blood from a breather.

  • -I think we have just what we need right here.

  • -They're going to make me a vampire.

  • Excellent!

  • -To the training room.

  • We need to get to the book.

  • [door opening]

  • [footsteps]

  • -Huh, it likes you and your blood.

  • VLAD: Ingrid.

  • -Should have left her to rot in Stokely.

  • Leopard spots, I'll say no more.

  • -No eternal life for you, Renfield.

  • -Master, a promise is a promise.

  • -Ow!

  • -Do something useful and find Bertrand.

  • Tell him his precious book's been stolen.

  • -No.

  • I'll find Bertrand.

  • -You're good with bones.

  • See if you can track down the book.

  • -OK.

  • -Your blood can unlock the power of the "Praedictum Impaver."

  • We can't let Ingrid get her hands on you.

  • Don't let him out of your sight.

  • -All right.

  • -I won't leave the Master's side.

  • -You made a good start when you put your finger in the book.

  • -But you weren't there.

  • -Ah, something Vlad said-- "If it wasn't for her,

  • you'd have no text in your precious book."

  • I put two and two together and got you.

  • Now I need more blood to reveal the rest.

  • Vlad had his chance, but he was weak,

  • falling for a breather like you.

  • It's time for a change of leadership.

  • -You and who's army?

  • -I don't need an army, just a power

  • from the book and a few old friends.

  • They'll be here soon.

  • So shall we?

  • ERIN: Ugh!

  • [evil laughter]

  • -Erin!

  • ERIN: Ugh!

  • Uh!

  • Eh!

  • -Bertrand!

  • -Eh!

  • Ugh!

  • Uh.

  • Too bad they won't be here to see you reveal the text.

  • Everyone will think Vlad did it.

  • -You're right.

  • BERTRAND: Hmph!

  • Don't go anywhere.

  • -Untie me before Bertrand gets back.

  • -I'll come back and free you when Ingrid's taken over

  • and Vlad's no more.

  • -Don't let Ingrid drag you down with--

  • -Ugh!

  • -Are you OK?

  • -Oh!

  • I am now.

  • -Where's Bertrand? +5+56

  • -He's gone to get his followers.

  • We don't have long.

  • -Where's the book?

  • -Ryan took it for Ingrid.

  • -I need to get you out of here.

  • Just go, keep running, and don't look back.

  • -The last time you told me to do that, I got

  • kidnapped by Bertrand!

  • I think I'm safer sticking with you.

  • -It's a vampire fight.

  • -I used to be a slayer, remember?

  • -Go out of my way, you fool.

  • I'm thirsty!

  • Go and uncork me a Duke!

  • -But Master, Vlad said we got to stick together.

  • -Go now!

  • INGRID: Good work, Ryan.

  • What a lovely gift.

  • -So, fresh blood opens the book.

  • I have to unlock the power before Vlad

  • or Bertrand find us.

  • Fetch me Renfield-- alive.

  • [hiss]

  • -So, Ingrid has the book, and the tutor turns traitor.

  • I should've known he couldn't be trusted.

  • I mean what kind of name is Bertrand,

  • with his rolling eyes and wavy hair?

  • -We need to teach him a lesson.

  • -Hey, Ingrid-- Ingrid's hiding in the Assembly Hall.

  • She's-- she's going to kidnap Renfield for his blood.

  • VLAD: You were supposed to be guarding him!

  • THE COUNT: But all this excitement made me thirsty!

  • -You find Renfield.

  • We'll go get the book.

  • Come on.

  • -Uh.

  • Uh.

  • Aah.

  • Ugh.

  • [hiss]

  • -Oh, poo.

  • [hiss]

  • [screaming]

  • JONATHAN VAN HELSING: Can you make it to our base?

  • Over.

  • SLAYER (ON RADIO): We're pinned down.

  • They came out of nowhere, headed for the school.

  • Over.

  • -How many are there?

  • Over.

  • SLAYER (ON RADIO): I ca-- I can't tell.

  • They're moving too fast.

  • Watch out, she's right behind you!

  • Man down!

  • Man down!

  • We-- we're not going to make it.

  • A-augh!

  • -What is your exact position?

  • We're coming to help you.

  • Over.

  • What is your position?

  • Do you read me?

  • Over.

  • BERTRAND: Go home, slayers.

  • You cannot defeat us.

  • MINA VAN HELSING: Without those reinforcements,

  • we can't launch another attack on the school, just

  • the two of us.

  • -I don't like the odds, but what else are we going to do?

  • -We can choose to life to fight another day.

  • -What, and let Vlad get away?

  • Not on my watch.

  • I'm going in.

  • -Good to see you, brothers.

  • Safe trip?

  • -We met some slayers on the way.

  • It was a good warmup.

  • -Everything's ready.

  • I have the "Praedictum Impaver" and a breather.

  • -Then lead on.

  • Your future is waiting to be written.

  • -Hm.

  • I should have caught her blood in the book

  • when I had the chance.

  • -If she gets the book to Vlad, this

  • is going to be a wasted trip.

  • [sigh]

  • -Not if we find her first.

  • [muffled voice]

  • -Welcome to my little book club.

  • I think you'll enjoy reading this.

  • It's a cut above the rest.

  • -No!

  • I--I-- I'm not really into hard backs.

  • I prefer comics.

  • RENFIELD: Ow.

  • Ow!

  • -It opened for Erin.

  • What has she got that Renfield hasn't?

  • -Cleanliness?

  • -Erin's got slayer's blood.

  • It must be slayer's blood that opens the book.

  • -Oh, that's the Count's favorite!

  • I've got it in me-- oh.

  • [creaking]

  • [footsteps]

  • [radar]

  • -They've got someone surrounded.

  • [hiss]

  • -Someone's been busy making new friends.

  • -Looks like we both have.

  • -She has the "Praedictum Impaver."

  • -Back off!

  • It's mine.

  • [hiss]

  • -I thought you'd changed.

  • -And I thought you were his trusted teacher.

  • Guess you can't judge a book by its cover.

  • -Evil minds think alike.

  • [hiss]

  • -Give that back!

  • BERTRAND: The last page is blank.

  • We need more slayer's blood.

  • I'm at the last drop.

  • There's no more to be had.

  • INGRID AND BERTRAND: Erin.

  • INGRID: Perfect timing.

  • -Hand over the book.

  • -Hand over Erin.

  • -The book needs slayer's blood.

  • [hiss]

  • -Stay back!

  • We'll destroy the lot of you.

  • MINA VAN HELSING: Prepare to be ashed.

  • Now Jonno!

  • INGRID: We think we've run out of slayer's blood

  • and then three come along at once.

  • Grab them!

  • -Stay!

  • -Augh.

  • -Uh!

  • -It's OK.

  • They can't enter unless we invite them in,

  • so we'll be safe.

  • -Come to me.

  • -Back off, bookworms.

  • -I, Sethius, am the power of the "Praedictum Impaver."

  • Now I have all the blood I need.

  • I can make my return.

  • -Well?

  • [thunder]

  • [screaming]

  • [moaning]

  • -Ahh!

  • -Not expecting that.

  • -That feels good!

  • I thought I was never getting out of there.

  • What century is this and where am I?

  • -21st century.

  • England.

  • -I am Sethius-- the "Chosen One."

  • -You can't be here.

  • Vlad is the "Chosen One."

  • -Aagh!

  • [cough]

  • -Are you calling me a liar?

  • -No!

  • [coughing and choking]

  • -Anyone else want to question?

  • -Let him go!

  • -Make me.

  • [coughing]

  • -Augh.

  • Ugh.

  • [thud]

  • -You've got guts.

  • Schoolgirls and scoundrels all lining up

  • to take a bite out of you.

  • You can wipe them out with a swipe of your hand.

  • -I doubt that.

  • -Let's work together, you and me.

  • I think we can lock this sorry lot into shape.

  • What do you say?

  • -Put it here, blood brother.

  • Now, who's going to give Sethius the grand tour?

  • -It would be my pleasure.

  • -But probably not yours.

  • I'll show you.

  • SETHIUS: Stop kissing my coffin.

  • You can both do it.

  • I'll be the rose between two thorns.

  • [mocking laughter]

  • BERTRAND: Um, this way, Sire.

  • INGRID: Don't you mean Your Majesty?

  • BERTRAND: Or Your Eminence, if you prefer.

  • SETHIUS: Yes, something like that.

  • -Are you OK?

  • -The only thing he injured is my pride.

  • Who knows what he'll do next time.

  • He's got bats in his belfry.

  • -We need to play for time.

  • -Why wait?

  • Let's finish him now.

  • -He's a maniac, but he's not stupid.

  • We need to take him by surprise.

  • I'll need you to build me a suncatcher.

  • And I'll keep him occupied until the sun comes up,

  • and then we can make our move.

  • -Goodbye old friend, "parting is such sweet sorrow, "

  • except in this case, where it's good riddance,

  • you back-breaking lump of oak!

  • I mean, would a cushion have been too much to ask?

  • -Sorry, Master, my sincere apologies.

  • I will procure for you a coffin lined

  • with the finest velvet in all the land.

  • -"In all the land"?

  • Who are you, Hans Christian Andersen?

  • -Don't listen to his fairy tales.

  • How does a custom-fitted coffin with a built-in blood dispenser

  • sound?

  • -You deserve grandeur-- hand-carved mahogany

  • with gold fittings.

  • -What about some new clothes?

  • -As annoying as you two are, it would be helpful for my plans

  • if I didn't have to eviscerate you just yet.

  • JONATHAN VAN HELSING: Come on.

  • Come on.

  • SETHIUS: You're going to have to come out of there sooner

  • or later, because I'm pretty sure your strange little igloo

  • doesn't have an en suite.

  • Now let's go and wipe out the nearest town.

  • -Oh, great idea.

  • But first, how about we have a little competition

  • and see which one of us is the most powerful

  • "Chosen One," who's got the biggest fireballs.

  • -Ah!

  • You really want to be humiliated in front of this lot?

  • -Can you beat that?

  • -(CHUCKLING) I think we've found our winner.

  • -Let's stop messing about and play a proper game, shall we?

  • Your turn.

  • -I could dust everyone in this room if I wanted to.

  • -Impressive, but not as impressive as this.

  • [screaming]

  • -Why did you do that?

  • -Because I can!

  • And I'm only Just getting started.

  • I have a vision of the future-- a vision

  • of the perfect vampire world.

  • Well, I'm here to make it come true.

  • I will lead us in a war against breathers.

  • And we'll bite every last one with our food all gone.

  • We'll fight one another and the anarchy will reign supreme.

  • The ultimate state of evil will have been achieved.

  • [maniacal laughter]

  • -You're crazy!

  • -That's what the old vampires thought in my day,

  • so they looked me up in the book.

  • But now I'm out and the fun can begin.

  • -Yes, you've taken pop-up books to a whole new level.

  • SETHIUS: I know something.

  • You bore me.

  • -Dad!

  • -The Count will stay like that forever to remind you

  • I'm in charge around here.

  • Now, who's with me?

  • I said, who's with me?

  • ALL: I am.

  • I am.

  • -Good!

  • Let's start planning the attack.

  • -Renfield, do something!

  • -Yes, Master.

  • Wilfred!

  • I invented a formula for our rematerialization spray,

  • but I need your help.

  • Come on!

  • -You're weird.

  • -Yeah?

  • You're half vampire, half werewolf.

  • And stop with the name-calling!

  • -Did it work?

  • -Don't know.

  • I never tried it before.

  • We have to mix the liquids at the same time.

  • Otherwise--

  • -Otherwise?

  • - --it will explode.

  • SETHIUS: We'll start here and bite our way south.

  • It'll be fun watching them scrambling for the boats,

  • crawling over each other trying to escape.

  • Some of them will get away, but most of them

  • will fall to our fangs.

  • -It's nearly sunrise.

  • If we can keep him busy 'til first light at six,

  • we can let Mother Nature take him down.

  • -How are you going to get him outside?

  • -I'm not.

  • I'm bringing the sunshine in.

  • At dawn, a shaft of light will hit the school crest here.

  • But how are you going to get Sethius

  • to be on this exact spot at that exact time?

  • -Many fangs make light work.

  • SETHIUS: Our numbers greater than the stars in the sky,

  • spreading out across the land like a--

  • -I'm not like Sethius.

  • I want vampires and humans to live together in peace.

  • That's what you want?

  • Carnage and chaos?

  • You tried that in Stokely and look how that ended.

  • You can help him with his master plan and everyone dies,

  • or you can help me.

  • We need blood, but this is the 21st century.

  • We can set up blood banks to feed

  • vampires all over the world.

  • No more biting.

  • No more slaying.

  • You want power, not annihilation.

  • Work with me, and I'll give you the status

  • you've always craved.

  • -You're really going to stop Sethius?

  • -I'm going to try.

  • You with me?

  • Your choice.

  • -Deal.

  • -We're in.

  • Tell us what you need us to do.

  • SETHIUS: It will be a symphony of slaughter,

  • the concerto of chaos, an opera of apocalypse!

  • -Ugh!

  • SETHIUS: We could fang out to Spain,

  • Portugal, France, Germany--

  • -Well done, boys.

  • Now let's get out of here without making a sound.

  • -Yes, Master.

  • Do you think he's heard me?

  • -Do you want to tell him or shall I?

  • -Ow, ow!

  • -Most ingenious.

  • You and your inventive little freaks

  • might come in handy for taking over the world.

  • Stick around, and await my orders.

  • [clock ticking]

  • -All in position.

  • -Thanks, Renfield.

  • And remember, wait for my signal.

  • -Now?

  • -Go, go.

  • -Right.

  • My dear Sethius, my family would like to show our support

  • for your vision to create anarchy by presenting you

  • with your first breather to bite.

  • -No, Vlad, please let me go!

  • -Take her as a token of our respect.

  • -Well, this is more like it.

  • Was it really necessary for all that unpleasantness?

  • We're finally on the same page, the one

  • here that says I have the power.

  • And I think it was your blood that filled in the first page

  • here, so it's only fitting that you're the first one to go.

  • [clock chime]

  • -Every story has a beginning, and every breather

  • has an ending.

  • [cocking of trigger]

  • [evil laughter]

  • -Did you really think I was so stupid?

  • No one beats Sethius!

  • [screaming]

  • [joyful laughter]

  • RENFIELD: Wolfie!

  • We did it!

  • -Ha ha ha ha ha!

  • MISS MCCAULEY: Hello?

  • Hello?

  • Is someone in pain?

  • Is everybody all right?

  • I heard screaming.

  • What happened?

  • What are you all doing here?

  • -Sorry for the mess, Miss McCauley.

  • We had a little impromptu gathering.

  • MISS MCCAULEY: People normally their campfires outside.

  • -Won't happen again.

  • I promise you.

  • -Well, If it does, you better invite me.

  • -It's a date.

  • -Right.

  • -So, you've finally come around to my way of thinking--

  • living peacefully with breathers.

  • -Not likely.

  • Or perhaps maybe.

  • -And can we please try to get along as a family for the next,

  • say, 100 years?

  • -With me as the head, obviously.

  • -I thought you said we'd share the power.

  • -Uh, what I actually said was I'd

  • give you the status you deserve.

  • -That will be equal to a swamp rat then.

  • -Which will give you top position as my Number Two.

  • -No, no, no, she can't be your Number Two!

  • You're my Number Two.

  • That makes her Number Three!

  • -No way am I Number Three!

  • -Oh, this is going to be a long 100 years.

  • -Vlad.

  • No biting

  • -No slaying.

  • -No fun.

  • [theme music]

[theme music]

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