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[Red:] Dude, wake up! I think we're lost.
[Blue:] What? [Red:] I can't read these signs.
[Blue:] Cuz they're in Spanish! Are we in Mexico?
[Music playing]
[Gunshots]
[Red:] Oh-ho-ho, baby. Yeah, we're in Mexico.
[Blue:] Well fuckin' pull over, man!
We gotta get directions home!
[Yelling]
[Blue:] Oh my god, my car!
[Red:] Dude, third rule of Mexico.
[Blue:] How're we gonna get home?
[Red:] I dunno, got any money?
[Bird screech]
[Blue:] Mexican eagles!
Shit! We've no money, no car, and no passports.
We have to sneak back into America.
[Red:] We'll call it
"Misión imposible"
[Girl:] (Your Spanish es tres bueno.)
(Donde escucho super mecedes?)
[Red:] (Cinco de mayo de burrito taco)
(Quesadilla delicioso de guarro)
[Blue:] Dude, you speak Spanish?
[Red:] Nah, I'm just makin' it up.
[Blue:] Well, try to ask her how to get home!
[Red:] (Uh, Jesus Christo, dos equis)
(Burro show!)
[Girl:] (*Gasp* Diablo rojo!)
[Red:] I think it worked!
[Girl:] (Salsa...)
[Blue:] Oh wow, awesome.
[Woman and donkey grunting]
[Cheering crowd]
[Red:] Man, this place is crazy!
[Blue:] That poor donkey...
That poor woman!
[Red:] Dude. Everyone here is poor.
[Brown:] (El diablo rojo!)
[Gold:] (Dios mio!)
[Brown:] (Diablo rojo! Es diso el show de burro?)
(Donde esta el baño!)
[Red:] Hey, I think these muchachos are gonna give us a ride!
[Blue:] Oh, thank god.
[Red:] This looks legit.
[Brown:] (Carne asada.)
[Blue:] Uh. Is this part of the ride?
[Brown and Gold:] (Die, putos!)
[Gunfire]
[Blue:] Who are we shooting at?
[Red:] Didn't you hear? Putas!
[Blue:] Dude! Is this cocaine? Cocaína?
[Brown:] No, taco. It's burritos.
[Red:] Burritos?
Estos burritos! Esta por el diablo!
[Brown:] It's el backstaberojo!
[Blue:] What did you do?
[Red:] Get in the van! We're stealing these burritos!
[Crash]
[Red:] Dude, this is sweet!
We got a car, we got a ton of money.
Best of all, we've got burritos!
[Blue:] I am never napping again.
[Snoring]
[Blue:] Oh, crap! Dude where are we?
[Red snoring] [Blue:] Red?
Oh NOOOOOOOO
[Dick figures outtro]