Okay, real quick.

Oh, you have a new puppy.

I guess you gotta cuddle something.

You teach elementary school kids.

You're teaching them how not to be like you?

And you're spending a lot of time with...Robert.

Who the hell is Robert?

It's only been six weeks.

Rollerblading along the beach?

That was our thing.

So what? He volunteers at an animal shelter.

Get a real job, asshole.

That jawline has plastic surgery written all over it.

Great, he cooks.

You said Indian food gave you gas.

You hike now.

You're a hiking couple.

Oh, and he is one of those assholes that hikes without his shirt on.

Of course, he plays guitar.

What next? He has the voice of an angel?

(Joyful all ye nations rise) Asshole. Still an asshole.

"Had a blast with my...cousin."

They're cousins.

He seems cool.