I'm now convinced Jeff Bridges is a crazy f**cker

我現在相信Jeff Bridges是個他媽的瘋子

and not in a cool way

而且一點都不酷

Just in a disturbed hobo shouting at sparrows and sidewalks way

而且是像是一個會對麻雀還有人行道亂吼亂叫，流浪漢一樣的瘋子

It's a very brilliant critic, I'll take that at the heart.

你真是一位厲害的評論家，我會銘記在心的

Kristen Bell seems like such a bitch, her vagina is probably an Alcatraz for penis.

Kristen Bell真是個婊子，她的小妹妹可能是弟弟們的禁域

If you find Benedict Cumberbatch attractive,

如果你認為Benedict Cumberbatch很迷人

I'm guessing you'd also enjoy staring directly at a cats anus.

我猜你也會喜歡盯著貓咪的屁屁

But someone did, and she put a ring on it.

但還是有人喜歡我，而且她套了結婚戒指在我手上

Some people ask me who has the biggest penis in Hollywood.

有些人問我好萊塢裡，誰的小弟弟最大

Easy! Bette Midler.

簡單啊！Bette Midler！

Liam Neeson is a butterface,

Liam Neeson 是個背影殺手

in that his face looks like a butt.

也就是說，他的臉看起來像屁股

Eat s**t fart breath Neeson

吃屎吧，滿嘴屁味的Neeson

This is from @Jonlgnanz... Jon Lg Gnanz... dosen't matter

這是來自Jonlgnanz...Jon Lg Gnanz...的推特，不重要啦

Emily blunt's eyes make up for that horrendous sound that comes out of her mouth

Emily blunt 的眼睛彌補了她難聽聲音的缺憾

Hash tag #britishaccent, in case, you didn't know what he mentioned

標記#英國腔，以防你不知道我在說什麼

I hate salma hayek movies. Her voice annoys me and they never show us her boobs. Meh~

我討厭salma hayek的電影，她的聲音很惱人，而且她從來都不露咪咪，咩

Is Andrew Garfield trying to do his utter best to look like pedophile

Andrew Garfield 是在盡全力地讓他看起像有戀童癖嗎？

that lives in an RV.

也就是那種會住在休旅車裡的怪人

Yes!

耶！

Okay...this is from @tad10ck

好的，這是來自tad10ck的推特

Is Jack Black married cause thats f**king gross

Jack Black結婚了嗎？因為這真他媽的太噁了

Just retweet

馬上回推

Halle Barrie's boobs are lopsided

Halle Barrie的咪咪外擴很嚴重

Well, when they're real...that happens

如果咪咪是真的，那自然就會發生

Conspiracy theory: Toby Maguire is just a hamster in a robot

陰謀論：Toby Maguire是個藏在機器人外表底下的小倉鼠

Not me though, cause it's spelled differently

不是在說我，因為我名字不是這樣拼的

Not to sound mean but Nasomo Wastts has such a blah face

我不是故意要這麼餓毒，可是Nasomo Wastts的臉很乏味

I look at it and there's just nothing, like a blank space where features should be

我盯著她看，根本什麼五官都沒有，像一片空白的宇宙

Hey George Clooney, your haircut sucks

嘿George Clooney，你的頭髮醜爆了

Oh and so does your sense of humor

噢，而且跟你的幽默感一樣爛

I'm on you all night f**k boy

我盯上你了！孬種！

I'm really sick of seeing the rock...blah, blah, blah

我看到巨石(強森)就覺得很厭煩，blah blah blah

dwayne johnson...blah, blah

強森，blah blah blah

candy ass movie star...blah, blah, blah

孬種電影明星，blah blah blah

go suck it!

去你的

I'll give you something to suck!

我去你的

Gwyneth Paltrow you ugly ass big bird looking bitch, shut the f**k up.

Gwyneth Paltrow你這個醜屁股的大鳥婊子，閉嘴！