Hey! Some guy is here in yellow!

And I'm like it's Pikachu!

And they're like barely!

And I'm like thank you.

(upbeat organ music)

- Today we're trying on sexy childhood-ruining costumes.

- So basically sexy versions of things for babies.

- Some things just aren't meant to be sexy.

- It's for children. - (imitating vomiting)

- We're gonna give some people some confusing boners.

- Who watches a cartoon a cartoon and is like,

yepp, I wanna (bleep) that.

- I mean I was sexually awakened by cartoons.

I don't think anyone wasn't.

- [Voiceover] They're (bleep) everywhere,

they're a nightmare.

- Oh! Minions! These guys are so funny.

- Are they like (bleep) fire hydrants, right?

- You can't ruin a childhood that's still happening.

- It's got a chinstrap?

(laughing) Is this right?

- These feel stretched out. Has Ned been in these?

- That is a tight minion.

- Off to a good start.

(laughing) Oh what a mistake I've made.

- If anyone does the Minion voice in this,

I'm going to be very upset.

(unintelligible speaking)

- Oh no!

Aren't these guys like evil? Isn't that their thing?

- Little ass in there.

- They're just little pill-bugs that hump.

They're like super sexually driven,

this honestly isn't that dishonest of them.

- I don't know which way is forward anymore.

- This wouldn't ruin my childhood,

it would titillate my childhood.

(unintelligible speaking)

- Anything yellow that resembles them,

they wanna (bleep) it.

(singing) ♫- I'm for a childhood-ruining

couples costume ♫

- This is a mall pretzel-vendor costume.

- Candy stripers?

- Where do your boobs go? - Oh yeah!

- Is there such a thing as camel toe for guys?

- It's called moose knuckle.

- Oh no, this is so horrible.

- Looks like a mean librarian.

- I think I'm more of an Ernie.

- I don't think you're fitting into these shorts,

no offense.

- No eye holes.

- That just scares me.

- Duck on the butt.

- Rubber duck is so close to rubber dick.

- I'm hiding the letter D.

- I love couples costumes.

Usually go with my wife, - But,

- could make an exception. - make an exception.

- This would be really good as a

sexy gay couples costume.

- Yeah it doesn't make any sense for women.

- Here let's adjust it.

- It's like (bleep) what up!

Let's (bleep) each other.

- Hi-ya Burt!

- Ernie, you smell like liquor.

- I didn't think Burt ever really liked Ernie.

- He like hate (bleep) him a lot.

- He might as well have an openly gay, very sexual

couple on Sesame Street.

They already have entire fists up their butt anyways, so.

- Alright, they're puppets.

- [Voiceover] Pikachu! Oh boy.

- I know this tail,

I had a GameBoy Colour.

- Pikachu is a fearsome character

cause he's fast, but also powerful.

- You're making me a sexy Pikachu?

Is that allowed?

- Cartoon animals are free game to make sexy, I'm sorry.

I don't care who you are.

- I feel so naked.

- This isn't a costume, it's tubes.

- Oh! This is a man costume.

We're sexy men now.

- We've talked a lot today about sexualized lady costumes,

but guys also feel pressure to look good.

- Everybody look at my body!

I'm Pikachu or what not,

let's all (bleep) masturbate together.

- I think Pokemon are more fun to dress up as than trainers

because then you can be creative.

- Pikachu's a pre-teen, his voice hasn't dropped yet.

This is a sexy 12 year old.

- This is the cutest (bleep) thing ever.

- Pika! Pikachu!

- I'm a (bleep) sexy electric rat.

- Come into my cage, pika pika.

- This is a whole 'nother meaning

of the word Smash Brothers.

- Take a (bleep) Pika.

- Pikachu wanna (bleep).

- You all wanna (bleep) baby rats?

Be my guest.

I'm a sexy baby rat you can (bleep).

- [Voiceover] I'm glad I can turn some grandma's on.

- Oh! I get to be Cinderella?

Little 'ol me?

- Oh no.

- I'm Belle.

Does that mean my wife is the beast?

- I get to be a villain. (evil laughter)

- Alright now I'm a mermaid.

- If you were wearing a thong,

this would be a seriously kinky costume.

- Oh damn!

It's getting some dominatrix shit.

- Fairy Godmother made my dress out of a dish towel.

- She did not show this much leg,

I'll tell you that much.

- That is a titty hole.

- Come on, I can only wear this until midnight.

- Suck in more.

- I can't, I have a ribcage like a normal person.

- Do I enter from the bottom?

- Gotta do the bow.

You could fit some boobs in here.

- It makes sense to sexualize Disney characters.

Oftentimes the sexiest characters are the villains.

- I am talking boobs.

- Bibbity boppity boobs!

- This is like a cheap, trashy version

of a beautiful ballgown.

- Goo goo gaa gaa, boys.

- I feel like I'm a condom.

- I'm the belle of the ball.

- I just wish they'd give me enough fabric

to cover up this big 'ol pumpkin.

- Bonjour!

- It's gorgeous.

- You want a bite of this poison apple?

- Mirror mirror on the wall,

show me the try-guy

whose skin as pale as cottage cheese.

Hair cover the body like a rabid beaver.

- [Voiceover] Cinderella's whole objective

is I got one night to find a man.

Why not Halloween?

- That'd be a fun costume

if I had my friends dress as like, sexy woodland creatures.

They sing and they cum on my arms.

(backstage laughter)

- I feel like we ruined a lot of people's childhoods today.

I mean look at me.

This is clearly a mistake.

- You love your body and you like showing it off,

be as sexy as you want.

- Just don't do it when there are kids around!

- If a three year old owns pajamas

with this character on it,

you shouldn't be wearing it sexy for Halloween.

Just like, come on.

But don't cum on me.

- [All] Happy Halloween!

We're sorry!

- We've done worse,

but this certainly isn't helping anybody.

(screaming)

- Do we have scissors?

- Happy Halloween.