Expect that most things are going to go wrong: marriage, job, holidays, kids.

Look at the glass half empty, and then feel grateful whenever things aren't an outright catastrophe.

2. Stop ranting about how awful other people are.

Most annoying people aren't evil, they're just anxious or sad.

Forgive them.

They didn't set out to hurt you, they're just under a lot of pressure.

3. Think of death a lot.

Keep a skull on your table.

You've probably only got about four hundred thousand hours left.

4. Laugh at yourself.

Stop thinking of yourself as a stupid idiot.

You're something far nicer: a lovable fool.

5. Make regular appointments to talk with someone you don't spend enough time with... you.

Ask yourself what you really want and are anxious about.

6. Stop trying to make yourself happy; it's impossible.

Concentrate on cheering up other people.

7. Look at yourself as if from the ISS, 240 miles above the Earth.

From this height, lots of things that are bothering you look the size they should always have been.

8. Throw your phone off a cliff, for a bit, so you can finally notice stuff, especially your partner and your mom.

9. Give up on the idea that you should be normal.

The only normal people are people you don't know yet.

Everyone is weird.

And that's totally okay.