(10/10 would watch )

*俄羅斯 . 的孩子* *德國* *残酷な天使のように*

[Neon Genesis OST continues ]

*少年よ 神話になれ*

(get in the damn robot shinji!)

*笨蛋 希特勒計畫* *Gay 我是殺人的變態* *少年よ 神話になれ*

(Project Hitler Networks Presents)

*阿道夫·希特勒*

WHAT IS UP?!?!

安怎????

BRO-ARMY NATION?

Bro Army Nation (註:改自DRAMAALERT NATION)

I am your new- uh

我是你的新...

I'm-

我有個新主意

I ran out of ideas..?

所以...今天... 所以...

So today, I'm..

從現在開始...我要

So... from now on.. I'm going to..

所以從現在開始... 我要報新聞

So from now on I'm going to report the news!

報...現在做新聞

(This wont end well...)

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

reporting-- I'm doing the news now.

我恨八卦,但我必須做

(Everybody type in the comments Pewds is a beautiful bastard)

這是我的目的

I hate drama, but I need to do this, this is my purpose.

這是我真實的目的 我想這會變成...

This is my real purpose and I think this might be, my core message.

我的核心價值

I made that video, I do- do- I'd still stand by,

我做了那部影片 我還是堅持...我恨八卦

I do hate drama, but I need to do this drama show now, 'cause

但我現在必須做這個八卦秀

Keem is quitting (Praise Odin for that), and Scarce is..

因為...keem不幹了 而Scarce...而Scarce...

Scarce *laughs*

讓我...我必須是原創的

LET'S- I need a- I need my- I need to be original here, otherwise this is not gonna work.

不然這不會成功

Uhh *Keemstar's "LET'S GET RIGHT INTO THE NEWS" plays*

讓我們爆出那些

LET'S GET SLAMMING ON THE PewDie-Pewbs will get into the news..

Pewdiepews會沉浸在這新聞

Let's go inside

讓我們進入...

[Rethinking his choice of words]

讓我們進入這故事

Uhhh...

事實上,我喜歡這個 就用這個吧

Let's go inside the stories!

讓我們進入這故事吧 這獨家

I like that one, actually, let's do that one.

喔,用獨家餌好多了

Let's go inside the stories!

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

The scoop! Oh no that's better, scoop is better.

讓我們進入最新的獨家吧

(I have so many questions with this picture)

你不會相信第一個故事

Let's get into the latest scoops!

Scarce被爆出來是同性戀

Our first story- you will not believe!

*我是Gay嗎?*

Scarce has come out as homosexual.

現在,他的父母也確定了他是Gay

*dramatic music*

*我爸媽現在覺得我是Gay*

Also his parents confirms, that- they think he is gay now.

我們連繫Scarce,要他做出回應

(Just show them your browser history)

關於這個情況

(MY parents would be terrified)

*然後,我是Gay 我跟我爸媽說,我是Gay,好嗎?*

We reached out to Scarce

*然後,我媽超級恐同*

for a comment

*我爸媽實際上...*

about the situation..

*像是...抓我的蛋蛋*

And/I'm/gay/I told my parents/I'm gay alright?

*現在他們確信我是Gay了*

and/my mom/is super homophobic/um both of like my mom and my dad-

*我的天...我天殺的不敢置信 我們下次再見*

actually like, grabbed my balls!

*我是Gay*

and/they both sincerely think i'm gay now

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

Oh my God I just- I cant fuckin believe it and I'll see you later peace!

Syndicate已經被確認 他是CS:GO的副總統

I'm/gay

可以從他影片的標題和縮圖得知

[Back to you Pewds]

我的天哪

Syndicate

還有我必須架設一個網站

has confirmed

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

that he is the vice president of CS GO..

另一則最新消息 抓到大尾了,各位

Lotto

iDubbbz也被認為是Gay

As you can see here on the title and thumbnail

在他的影片裡

$$$

*我是Gay*

Oh my God

*他真的看起來很Gay*

I need to create a website as well (pewdsroulette.notascam.com)

無論如何,在秀裡,我都不會加入自己的個人意見

Hail Hitler!

但我個人認為,這真是太了不起了

(Seriously what the hell is this?)

每個人都支持iDubbbz做的決定

Another breaking story this is a big one guys

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

iDubz has also come out as gay

下一則新聞,可能會讓你驚呆

in his, coming out video

它涉及我的好朋友,然後...

I'm gay!

做這個讓我痛苦

(Hi Gay, i'm Bob)

但是jacksepticeye說... 他要跟他全部的朋友見面

(Zoom just incase you're blind as a bat)

jacksepticeye沒有任何朋友

Now I don't personally give my opinion on the show, no matter what

為什麼他要說謊?? 不知道

But I personally think

為什麼Jack對這個情況說謊??

this is terrific (STFU Pewds!)

不知道 *我們什麼都不知道,也不在乎除了釣魚標題外的任何重點以及Youtube給的酷炫支票*

Everyone support iDubbz (This is the internet!)

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

in this.. (You can shove your opinion)

接下來下一則Nupes...新聞

decision.. (Up yer arse!)

下一則獨家,可能會讓你驚呆

Uhh, he made

科學的突破已經在Youtube裡完成了

The next news might shock you

RomanAtwood發現了 水比0度還要低溫

It involves a dear friend of mine and uhh

*史上最冷的水*

you know it pains me to do this

我們現在還無法得知 水有沒有可能溫度低於0度

but Jacksepticeye says

但看起來RomanAtwood完成了

I got to see all my friends

他還試圖在史上最冷的水裡游泳

(Say what now?)

不知為何,看起來,他活了下來

Jacksepticeye doesnt have any friends (You just called him a "dear friend" a while ago)

RomanAtwood有沒有可能是超人類?

why is he lying about this? (You had one job Pewds!)

我們連繫RomanAtwood,要他做出回應

We dont know

RomanAtwood? RomanAtwood在線上嗎?

Why did Jack lie about the situation

是的,我發現了最冷的水

We dont know

然後我直接走進去

Coming up next!

我必須向你們證明,它是... 病得很嚴重

noobs (???)

謝謝你持續支持Youtube社群

nudes (?????)

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

The next scoop is..

RomanAtwood殺了他的小孩

might..

我們連繫RomanAtwood,要他做出回應

shock you

是的,它只是釣魚標題

(That grammar shocked me)

所以你是說你沒有殺了你的小孩?

Uhhh

是的,我沒有...我沒有殺

A scientific breakthrough has been done in the YouTube community today

那為什麼你標題要這樣寫?

As Roman Atwood (Did I spell that right? I dunno the guy)

Roman??

Discovers water colder than 0 degrees

Ro...Roman??

(Calling something from 2 years ago news)

Roman尚做出回應

(God dammit Pewds you had one job)

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

Now we didn't know there was possible for c- water to be colder than 0 degrees

下一則獨家,各位

But it seems that Roman Atwood, has done it

Leafy決定離開Youtube

He also attempted to swim in this wa- coldest water ever

他正式在Youtube完了,然後...

and it seems that he survived somehow

我支持他

Could Roman Atwood be a superhuman

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

We reach out to Roman Atwood for a response

今天已經有很多獨家了 但是還有更多的獨家要揭露

Roman Atwood, is tha-

等等!這是什麼??!! 這是什麼??!!

were having Lo- Roman Atwood live here on the skype

這是什麼?新聞小隊

Totally not Pewds: Yeah dude I just, went in- I found the coldest water ever

ComedyShortsGamer找到了史上最棒的遊戲

Totally not Pewds: And I just went straight in

兩次

Totally not Pewds: I needed to prove, you dude that it was

*史上最棒的遊戲 史上最棒的遊戲*

Totally not Pewds: Sick dawg!

有沒有可能ComedyShortsGamer受失憶症之苦?!

Thank you for your, continued support, in the YouTube community

我們連繫ComedyShortsGamer,要他做出回應

[Transition]

這是獨家的實況

Roman Atwood has murdered his own children

Pewdiepie的父親...是Gay

(Kid looks plenty alive to me)

*我的爸爸是Gay嗎?*

(Also this happened 2 years ago)

我們連繫Pewdiepie的父親,要他做出回應

(Goddammit Pewds you're not doing this right)

絕對是最新消息

We reach out to Roman Atwood for a response

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

Totally not Pewds: Yeah dude its just, its just a clickbait, uh, title!

嘿,各位...接下來...

So you're saying you didn't murder your children?

看起來FaZe Rain殺了他的室友

Totally not Pewds: Yeah man, I wouldnt- I wouldnt- I wouldnt do that dude

這是個很大的新聞

Then why did you put it on the title?

我不知道是真是假

(Cause fuck you thats why)

但看起來他拿著一把刀,然後...

Roman?

往他室友的背去

Ro-

我不深入挖掘真相,因為...

Roman?

這沒什麼狗屁關係

Roman has yet to leave a response

但看起來,是的 FaZe Rain的確殺了他的室友

The next scoop everyone..

*獨家新聞秀* *神話になれ*

Leafy decides to leaf (Mandatory pun)

這是這一周的獨家

YouTube

希望你們都是這節目的粉絲

He is, officially done

我會做一年,然後不幹了

with YouTube. And..

keem回來吧,我做不來這天殺工作,好嗎?

I for once support leaf- *Couldnt hold it in*

我不...我不能...我做不到

There have a lot of scoops today but

我做不到

but there are

喜歡這部影片來得到更多的獨家

many more scoops to cover

Pewdiepie現在有很多訂閱

Wait, whats this?

*阿道夫·希特勒* *謝謝收看*

Whats this?

*阿道夫·希特勒* *Gay俄羅斯豬* *謝謝收看*

News team? (I think you need help Pewds)

蒼い風がいま

Whats this?

胸のドアを叩いても

Comedy shorts gamer has found the best game ever (Bear simulator)

私だけをただ見つめて

Twice

微笑んでるあなた

(It's 1 year ago, I'll give you a pass)

そっとふれるもの

[Zooms incase you're cant see for shit]

もとめることに夢中で

Could ComedyShortGamer, potentially suffer from amnesia? (RIP in peace Amnesia videos)

運命さえまだ知らない

We reach out to ComedyShortGamer

いたいけな瞳

For a response (loudscreamaheaddontsayididntwarnyou)

だけどいつか気付くでしょう

(Jesus Christ that scared the living shit outta me)

その背中には

This just in..

遥か未来 めざすための

right now live on the scoops

羽根があること

Pewdiepie's dad

残酷な天使のテーゼ

is gay

窓辺からやがて飛び立つ

(Now this is news!... Sort of..)

ほとばしる熱いパトスで

We reach out to Pewdiepie's dad for a response

思い出を裏切るなら

#DicksOutForHarambe

この宇宙を抱いて輝く

Absolutely news breaking

少年よ 神話になれ

Hey guys!

*女權主義者是強姦犯??!!

Uhh

傑尼龜!傑尼龜!

Next up

It look like FaZe rain murdered his roommate

Pretty big news here

Uhhm

I dont kmow if its true or not

But it seems like theres a knife

and

going into his roommates back

Uhhm

I'm not gonna dig deeper than this because

It dont fucking matter for shit

But it seems, yes, FaZe rain did murder his roommate

That was it for this weeks-

of-

Obs- Obscupse (Wut?)

Hope you're all a fan of this new show format

That I will do for a year and then quit (So much burn in this video it hurts)

Keem just come back (not) I cant do this, fucking job alright?

I dont- I cant

Cant do it

I CANT DO IT!

Favorite and like this video for more ehh

Ahh... Scoops

Pewdiepie now over a lot of subscribers

[Neon Genesis OST plays again and cue the eva intro rip off ]

(Im just gonna let other subtitlers write their stuff here)

*Random Hitlers*

(Praise NERV)

(Sigh....)

(Guess I have to do it for him again huh?)

(Like and favorite if you enjoyed)

(Blah blah blah...You probably know the rest)

[Insert brofist here]

Heyo Bros!!! I'm Jose haha

(This is weird music)

(Okay its growing on me)

(Great.. Now I like it..)

10/10 Neon Genises best OST

(Pewds forgot its supposed to be longer than 10min)

(Stay awesome bros!)

(Great thumbnail there Pewds, you practically set the comment section aflame)

(Actually, this whole video is a flame war)

(What? Still here?)

(There's nothing to see here move along)

hihihih subtitles

Now we know you only stayed for the subtitles

(Seriously)

(What the fuck are you doing?)

(Get a core message!)

I guess you never leave, huh?

You know when you have a really catchy song on your mind?

Maybe something like

baby don't hurt me

don't hurt me

no more

Now you've wasted a lot of time.. just leave

No? Still here?

Alright, you are..

Now I got a confession to make.. Since no-one knows who I am..

I am...

I AM A PROUD PIDGEON

ok seriously thats all

Stop wasting time.. I got no more to say

Actually I do..

Micheal stop messing up the subs

Don't vote Trump

Almost finished

just a few more seconds!

LETS GET READY TO RUMMMMBLLLE

*Squirtle Squirtle*

HI MOM!!!!!

IM A SUBTITLER!!!

Hey baby! You look like trash, can I take you out? (Great job, you stayed till the end for a split second horrible pickup line)