Before today's feature presentation,

在我們演講今日的主題前，

I would like to take a moment to

我想用些時間去

address an issue.

答一個問題。

Why I dislike the country France.

為什麼我不喜歡法國。

Now, it would be crazy of me to say

也許這會顯得我很瘋去說

that I didn't like France

我不喜歡法國

if I hadn't been to France multiple times.

如果我沒有去過法國多次。

First time, I'll admit, pretty great.

第一次，我會承認，是很不錯的。

Second time, also quite fun.

第二次，也很有趣。

Third time, I was on a

第三次，

subway and no one would help me

我在地鐵上

open the doors.

沒有人會幫我開門

Wait, that's the big, bad thing

等等，這是很大很壞的事

that happened in France?

在法國發生

Yes, in New York, you would help someone

對，在紐約，人們會幫人

get off the subway!

下車

I would say worse things have happened to me

我會說更差的事發生過在我身上

in this very apartment.

在這屋子裡

My family is French, my father and

我的家人是法國人，我爸爸和

grandmother are French...

祖母是法國人

Well, yeah, my family's French as well.

噢我家人也是法國人

Okay, well, we're like, directly French,

Okay, 但是我們是正統的法國人

uh...I've be-

還有⋯⋯

Yeah, and I dislike you

耶，我有時會不喜歡你

quite a bit often!

很多時候都會

I think maybe what happened,

我想真正發生的是，

if we're being totally honest, is

如果我們夠坦白，

I went to France during the worst time

我在最差的時候去了法國

of my entire life, I had just

人生中最差的時候

had my nose job so I couldn't see,

我剛剛做完鼻的整容手術，所以我看不見

I was on a medication for narcolepsy

我在吃嗜睡症的藥

that I didn't need,

不過我並不需要這藥

Ok.

Ok

I arrived at a summer program and instead

我參加了暑假活動

of international dormitories it

我不是住在國際學生宿舍

was a filthy hostel, and

而是在污糟的旅店

then I had to leave after three days

還有我要在三天後離開

instead of six weeks!

而不是六個星期

Yeah, do you think maybe that was you

所以你不覺得這是你的問題

and less France?

而不是法國的問題？

Could've been less France

也許不是法國

and more me.

而是我

JBU theme

主題曲

I thought this week it would

我想這星期可以

be fun to have a sing-along.

有更多樂趣如果我們能一起唱

Isn't every week a sing-along?

我們不是每星期都一起唱嗎？

No, this week, I'm just going

不是，這星期

to mouth the words, and then

我會只做口型

the viewer will sing it.

觀眾可以唱

International question,

國際問題

No, you got it wrong!

不，你錯了

I'm a viewer!

我是觀眾！

That's not even how

這不是

the song starts!

正確的唱法！

Ready? 1,2,3..

準備？1,2,3.

(mouthing) This week, we have an

⋯⋯

international question,

⋯⋯

international question,

⋯⋯

This is boring to me.

這很無聊

international question.

⋯⋯

Kathleen, Philippines!

菲律賓的Kathleen！

Look, we'll hear from

我們會在

the comments if that was

留言知道這是

good or bad.

好與壞

You can make up your

你可以自己作

own song, alright?

自己的歌，好吧？

If you want to sing

如果你想唱

a goodbye song, you can

首再見歌，你可以

come up with a

自己作首

goodbye song...

再見歌

Yeah, I guess it is

我想這是我的錯

my fault that I have not

我沒有

tried to attach a song

試過連起歌曲

to something.

跟任何事

You could have a

你可以有

"Welcome to Just Between Us" song...

歡迎到Just Between Us歌

Okay, fine.

Okay，好的

The possibilities are endless.

機會率會是無限

Okay!

Okay！

You can't just steal

你不可以偷走

my one thing.

我唯一的事

Okay. What if I had a

Okay. 如果我作一首

domestic question song?

本地問題歌呢？

Fine! But, you know,

好吧！不過，你要知道

it's been two years,

已經過了兩年

where is it?

它在哪？

Kathleen from the Philippines

菲律賓的Kathleen

wants to know,

想知道

when do you see yourselves

你想你何時

getting married?

結婚？

About two years ago, Kathleen!

大約兩年前，Kathleen！

Does she mean us getting

她是不是指我們

married to each other?

兩個互相結婚？

Hope not.

希望不是啦

Yeah, I'm your worst option.

沒錯，我是你最差的選擇

Well, Kathleen, I am

嗯 Kathleen

about to turn 28, and..

我差不多28歲了

Whoa!

嘩

I know.

是的

(with disgust) Bleugh!

嘔

I know.

是的

No, I'm actually happy about it

不，我其實對此很高興

because, I think...

因為

News for the viewers, I'm only

給觀眾的新聞，我只是

about to turn 27.

差不多27歲

Okay, great. Point is, is that...

Okay, 很好。我想說的是

You can tell, right?

你能看得出吧？

..when I was younger,

我年輕時

I thought that I

我想我

knew exactly what I wanted

知道我想要什麼

and that I was

我會

going to be this way.

行什麼的路

And now, I've reached an age

現在，我到了一個年紀

where I'm more willing

我會願意

to compromise

妥協

and I'm like, "Yeah, maybe..."

我會說"也許⋯⋯"

This is you compromising?

這是你在妥協？

Oh, yeah, I think I've become

是呀，我想我變得

much more reasonable.

更理性

I think I've become more unreasonable.

我想我變得更不理性

I think right now we should make

我想現在我們要

a pact that I get to

建立一個協議

get married first.

我會比你早結婚

I'm sorry, what?

對不起，什麼？

Yes, because you never cared

沒錯，因為你不在意

about marriage and it's not like

婚姻和這不是

your thing, and it's not

你的事和這不是你的

your "brand", and it's not

形象和這不是那種事情

the thing that keeps you up

會令你晚上睡不著

at night because you're

因為你

afraid it's never going

怕

to happen to you.

這永遠不會發生

Do you think that maybe

你會否覺得

the reason why I'm, like,

我會更早結婚

closer to that is because

的原因是

I don't put a lot

我沒有

of pressure on it and

放很多壓力

I don't care

我不理

if it happens?

它會不會發生

Obviously, Gaby.

很明顯吧Gaby

Psych 101.

心理101

I'll give you a contingency.

我會給你一個應變計劃

Okay.

好

If I'm not married

如果我十五年內

in fifteen years,

沒有結婚

then you can get married.

你就可以結婚了

How old am I then?

我會是多老？

40?

40?

More than 40.

超過40

Well, I'm gonna have to have kids

我要生小朋友

in between that.

在這段時間內

Oh, I'm sorry, with your

噢對不起，以你的

lifestyle you can't have

生活方式你不能

a kid out of wedlock?

沒有結婚生子

No, I could have-

不，我可以

What game are we

我們是在

playing here, Gaby?

玩什麼遊戲呀Gaby

You're gonna have kids, from, like,

你會有小孩

seven different dads,

他們會有7個不同的爸爸

why are you living with

同時你和你的

your wife?

老婆一起

You care about having babies

你介意小孩

more than me.

多過我

Which is an interesting thing

這是有趣的事發生

to have happen to you

在你身上

later on in your 20s, like,

只要你過了二十歲

to be like,

就是

"I don't want kids!", and then

"我不想要小孩"然後

to be like, "Whoa!"

就是像"嘩！"

Interesting or predictable?

有趣還是可估計的

If marriage is important

如果婚姻對你是重要的

to you and the other person

但另一半

won't marry you, then

不肯跟你結婚

you're not important

你對他

to them.

並不是很重要

Marriage as a thing doesn't

婚姻本身

actually matter.

並不重要

What's it get me to be

它為什麼令我

stubborn about it?

對它固執？

Like, what does it get me

它為何會令我

to be like, "No! I don't

覺得"不！"

believe in it."

"我不相信它"

You say yes, you get a

你說 可是

big party.

你會有個大派對

But I don't wanna, like,

但是我不想

have to plan this

準備這

whole thing.

整件事

I'll plan it, I'll plan

我會準備

your wedding.

我會準備你的婚禮

You're like, you were

你是

ready with that!

你隨時準備好

I'd love to plan your wedding!

我會很樂意準備你的婚禮

..and every night I cry

每一晚我都會哭

just a little bit 'cause

因為

it's not my wedding.

這不是我的婚禮

I'm so scared!

我很害怕！

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