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I was on worst mood on the way here.
I just get so revved up
when I
do these benchmark shows, you know
’cause I start to think about all the people that have tried to stop me
and I get this, like, super intense, like...
- Fury?
- Yeah! And I think about how I don’t really give a shit if people don’t understand what I do as long as my fans understand...
I just don't want my fans to ever feel...
I just sometimes feel like a loser still, you know?
It's crazy, 'cause it's like, we are at the Garden! But I still sometimes feel like a loser kid in high school.
And I just gotta to pick my shit up, I gotta pick myself up
and I have to tell myself that I'm a superstar every morning, so I can get through this day
and be for my fans what they need for me to be.
But sometimes I still feel like people are trying to destroy me.
- What are you going to teach them tonight? - That I cannot be destroyed.
- That's what you do every night!
I cannot be destroyed and I will not be destroyed
and you will never destroy the Kingdom that is my fans.
I've this, I'm like..., this feeling that I have to fight
I’m fighting for every kid that’s like me, that felt like I felt and feels like I still feel.
It hurts when I, you know...
how much... authenticity and how much genuine blood is in my spirit
and how much I feel like people don't know that, you know?
'Cause they see wigs and lipstick and they just shut down 'cause they don't understand...
- I'm sorry... - Don't be sorry.
I just want to be a queen for them, you know, but sometimes I don't feel like one.
I just... It's not about me, I'm not a winner for me anymore,
you know? It's about being a winner for all of them.