Hey Julia, you wanna go to the Renaissance Festival?

I'M GOING TO THE PAST

GOTTA COUPLE POUCHES INSTEAD OF POCKETS

YES IT'S KINDA PLEASANT, DRESSIN LIKE A PEASANT

THIS IS #$@KING AWESOME

Walk into the fair like bustin out the penitentiary

I'm so pumped about the 15th century

First thing I see, with its ears all floppy

My buddy said "DAMN THAT'S A SMALL ASS DONKEY" (what)

Strollin in 20 deep, headed to the queens tea

Dressed in dirty brown pants with my beat up Nikes

I looked up and suddenly the wench who's standing next to me

Said let's go to the washing well cuz you smell like salami

(pfffffffft)

It only cost me 99 pence! (pouch it)

Poppin it, lockin it bout to go and get some condiments

Pass up on the potatoes with the little spicy sausages

But now I'm getting hungry

So before I buy my moccasins

I dig into a turkey leg then toss it in the garbage (don't litter)

I'ma take the Siren's style I'ma take the Siren's style

No for real, ask the Sirens

Can I make the pirates drown (thank you)

Throw some ninja stars, ring the bell with the hammer

Make a challenge with the king to climb up Jacob's ladder

They had a lotion candle I bought a lotion candle

I bought a walking staff

Then I bought rope sandals

Hello, hello my short man, my bridge Troll

A walrus ain't got nothing on your front teeth, Hell No

You should get my number Here I'll text it to your tablet

But the SCA would be like, put away your gadget!

I'M GOING TO THE PAST

GOTTA COUPLE POUCHES INSTEAD OF POCKETS

YES IT'S KINDA PLEASANT, DRESSIN LIKE A PEASANT

THIS IS #$@KING AWESOME

I'M GOING TO THE PAST

GOTTA COUPLE POUCHES INSTEAD OF POCKETS

YES IT'S KINDA PLEASANT, DRESSIN LIKE A PEASANT

THIS IS #$@KING AWESOME

Watchu know about rockin a slick wolf t-shirt

Watchu talkin' bout doin more Renaissance research?

Put my fox tail on my kilt for the hell of it

Put my fox tail on my kilt for the hell of it

You don't get to tell me that my outfit isn't relevant!

Thank your very great granddad for making plaid skirts son

Cuz right now I'm about to go and buy one

I'm at Renfaire you can find me with the

(MERMAIDS)

I'm not, I'm not kidding these are real live

(MERMAIDS)

The Queen and the Knights and the Fairies in tights

They all think I'm lookin pretty nice

Because I floss in this Mothasucka

I hit the mudpit and I toss in a Mothatrucka

Jump from the tower cuz I'm boss in this Mothaclucka

They be like "Oh, that garland that's hella tight"

I'm like "Yo, it's only 15 shillings for some creepers"

If we take an abacus and then add this to this

Well then I think you get my gist that it's a pretty decent price (nice)

I call that, fencing with a gentleman (nice)

I call that a sweet ride on an elephant

This mead is hella dope

But having 6 more and then going to throw axes with the prince

Is a hella don't

Refrain, thank the Renaissance for the telescope

Try to leave this place without a smile

Man you hella won't

Man you hella won't

I'M GOING TO THE PAST

GOTTA COUPLE POUCHES INSTEAD OF POCKETS

YES IT'S KINDA PLEASANT, DRESSIN LIKE A PEASANT

THIS IS #$@KING AWESOME

I WEAR GREAT GRANDDADS CLOTHES

I LOOK INCREDIBLE

I'M IN THIS BIG ASS CLOAK

FROM THE RENFAIRE DOWN THE ROAD

I WEAR THESE HANDMADE CLOTHES

MY POUCH IS LOOKING BROKE

LET'S PET SOME BABY GOATS

AT THE RENFAIRE DOWN THE ROAD

I'M GOING TO THE PAST

GOTTA COUPLE POUCHES INSTEAD OF POCKETS

YES IT'S KINDA PLEASANT, DRESSIN LIKE A PEASANT

THIS IS #$@KING AWESOME