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  • Well, well. An anime. About...crazy ninjas, from the stars. Or something. Look, I don't

  • know what this is, I don't really watch anime. From what I can tell, dude knows karate and

  • has spiky hair. What a shocker! But I'll tell you this. If you like Fist of the North Star,

  • you were in luck in 2010. Because Ken's Rage was a decent game.

  • Your luck ran out by 2013, though.

  • As did Ken's hair gel.

  • That's because this sequel, Ken's Rage 2, is really just a shell of what its predecessor

  • was. I don't know what happened, but...things really fell off for this one. The budget,

  • first and foremost. Cutscenes are just...still images, which is both a nod to the manga and

  • a clever way to cut costs. Funny how that works out. The graphics are bland and blurry,

  • that beautiful brace of B-words, and the English voiceovers are gone.

  • A penny saved is a crappy sequel earned.

  • So how's it play, though? Well, did you play the first one? Because this one's just like

  • that one. You walk around, you got mobbed by bad guys, you throw those one million fists

  • of yours to bash their f*cking heads in. You can build up to do signature moves, but...for

  • the most part, this is Button Mash City.

  • Population, freaking, A button.

  • There's nothing wrong with a good button masher, but...this is not a good button masher. I

  • mean, there's really no gameplay hook whatsoever. The entire game is predicated on, "Wow, look

  • at all those enemies. There's blood everywhere." The moment those things wear off, so does

  • Ken's Rage 2.

  • There's just nothing beyond that here.

  • And again, what's weird is that...it's noticeably less good than the original. In this one,

  • the levels are all just...so cookie cutter. It's a pathway, open arena, pathway, boss.

  • The level design's as boring as the gameplay. Which is actually a pretty impressive feat.

  • So what does the game get right? Well, obviously, if you're into First of the North Star, there's

  • that basic appeal. Again, I don't even know these characters, but if you do, you obviously

  • are gonna be more interested. And there's a pretty neat supplemental mode that lets

  • you play as different characters, which is a really cool twist. It's kind of like Wicked.

  • You get to see things from the eyes of the witch. Or this guy.

  • I don't know. I like musicals. That's what I want. Oz! The...action-RPG.

  • Still, the problem with this game is that...it's a less-good version of the original, with

  • less-good everything. It doesn't look as good, its production values aren't as good...I mean,

  • the main mode is just a retelling of the same story from the first game. How is that even

  • a sequel? I mean, it's not a prequel, either. But...I guess it's an equal.

  • Only there's nothing equal about Ken's Rage 2.

Well, well. An anime. About...crazy ninjas, from the stars. Or something. Look, I don't

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