Take a few seconds and think of your personal biggest goal. OK. Imagine deciding, right now, that you are going to do it.

Imagine telling someone that you meet today what you are going to do. Imagine their congratulations and their high image of you.

Doesn't it feel good to say it out loud? Don't you feel one step closer already like it's already becoming part of your identity?

Uh. Well. Bad news. You should have kept your mouth shut because that good feeling will now make you less likely to do it.

Repeated psychology tests have proven that telling someone your goal makes them less likely to happen.

Anythime you have a goal there are some steps that need to be done. Some work that needs to be done in order to achieve it.

Ideally you would not be satisfied until you had actually done the work but when you tell someone your goal and they acknowledge it

Psychologists have found that, it's called a social reality, the mind is kind of tricked into feeling that it's already done.

and then because you have felt that satisfaction you are less motivated to do the actual hard work necessary. (audience laughs)

So this goes against the conventional wisdom that we should tell our friends our goals, right, so they hold us to it.

So let's look at the proof. 1926: Kurt Lewin founder of social psychology called this substitution.

1933: Wera Mahler found that when it was acknowledged by others it felt real in the mind.

1982: Peter Golwitzer wrote a whole book about this and in 2009 he did some new tests that were published and it goes like this.

163 people across 4 separate tests. Everyone wrote down their personal goal. Then half of them announced their commitment to this goal to the room and half didn't.

Then everyone was given 45 minutes work that would lead them directly to their goal but they were told that they could stop at any time.

Now those who kept their mouths shut worked the entire 45 minutes on average and when asked afterwards said that they felt that they had a long way to go still to achieve their goal.

But those who had announced it quit after only 33 minutes on average and when asked afterwards said that they felt much closer to achieving their goal.

So if this is true what can we do? Well, you could resist the temptation to announce your goal, you can delay the gratification that the social acknowledgement brings.

and you can understand that your mind mistakes the talking for the doing. But if you do need to talk about something you can state it in a way that gives you no satisfaction.

Such as I really want to run this marathon so I need to train 5 times a week and kick my ass if I don't, OK.

So audience the next time you are tempted to tell someone your goal what will you say? (silence) Exactly! Well done. (Laughs)

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