China’s secret plan to take over the world!

What’s that Shelley?

It’s not a secret?

They just held a huge conference about it in Beijing?

Dozens of world leaders were there?

And we have footage?

Hi, welcome to China Uncensored.

I’m your host, Chris Chappell.

It’s the biggest global economic investment project

in modern times.

Bigger even than Newt Gingrich's

proposed moon colony.

Yeah, remember when that was the weirdest thing

that happened in a presidential election?

Anyway, this global economic investment project

involves more than 60 countries

and one trillion dollars.

Which is more than the combined GDP

of the smallest 97 nations.

Or the price of 28 moon colonies.

And the whole thing is being led

by the benevolent leadership

of the Chinese Communist Party.

It’s called “One Belt, One Road.”

Or for short,

OBOR.

On Sunday,

heads of state from 29 countries

gathered at Beijing’s Great Hall of the People

for the “Belt and Road Forum.”

Or for short, BARF.

Which is how I feel right now.

Especially because all of China’s favorite

political strongmen were there!

Turkish president-for-life with sweeping new powers,

Recep Erdoğan.

Filipino president and proud killer of drug suspects,

Rodrigo Duterte.

And Russian president and former KGB agent,

Vladmir Putin.

Just look at that swagger.

“Jinping,

I could take you in fight.

Maybe not wife.”

So why is China trying to gather

all these nations together?

Well, as Xi Jinping explained on Monday,

countries need to stick together

like swan geese.

Because, quote,

“Swan geese are able to fly far and safely

through winds and storms

because they move in flocks

and help each other as a team.”

Yes!

Swan geese fly together!

Swan geese fly together!

Quack, quack, uh, I mean,

honk, honk, honk!

The point is,

Xi is clearly expecting winds and storms

and is looking for strength in numbers.

So what is this trillion-dollar

flying V-shaped globalization initiative,

with China at the helm?

I’ll let China’s state-run English TV network,

CGTN explain.

“China states that the Belt and Road Initiative

is a systematic project,

which should be built upon the principle

of ‘extensive consultation,

joint contribution,

and shared benefits.’”

Could we go back to the swan geese part,

because that was easier to understand.

If only someone could explain One Belt, One Road

in a simple way.

Like for children.

The Belt connects the land

The Road moves on the sea

The promise that they hold

Is joint prosperity”

Ok, I get the belt part.

It’s a metaphor for how Xi Jinping

keeps his pants so high.

But a road that moves on the sea?

Wait a minute,

is this about those artificial islands

in the South China Sea?

Are they building moving roads now

to connect all of them?

Anyway, state-run New China TV,

please continue.

“With our lines and our cables

Diplomacy tables

We’ll share in a world of prosperity!

OH~

The future’s coming now

OH~OH~OH~OH~

The Belt and Road is How

OH~OH~OH~OH~”

The Belt and Road is Hao?

As in, the Chinese word for “good”?

Oh oh oh oh oh.

Oh.

Congratulations to Chinese state-run media

for really upping their propaganda game.

But maybe you’re still not clear

what One Belt, One Road actually is.

Maybe one of the other children’s videos

by Chinese state-run media can explain.

“Once upon a time,

several routes led from China

to Central Asia to Europe

It was called the Silk Road.

Well, a few years ago,

China's president Xi Jinping proposed

making new routes like the old routes.

But even bigger.”

That’s pretty much the gist of it.

China wants to be the new world leader.

Not through actually colonizing the world

with military force—

which frankly never turns out well;

ask the British.

No, China wants to rule with economic force.

One Belt, One Road is about building

giant infrastructure projects in Asia,

Europe, and Africa.

Mainly things like roads,

rail lines, tunnels, bridges,

seaports, and power plants.

In theory, this will bring

resources and power to China,

and money and goods to everyone.

You know, “joint prosperity.”

China is pledging around a trillion dollars,

with tens of of billions spent so far.

According to China’s Caixing Magazine,

50 Chinese state-owned enterprises

have invested in nearly 1,700 projects

since Xi Jinping first announced the initiative

in 2013.

Those include 60 energy-related projects,

like gas pipelines from Russia and Kazakhstan

to China.

They also include high-speed train routes,

like the 4-billion-dollar rail line

that will send trains from Ethiopia into Djibouti.

Now in theory,

China spending billions of dollars to invest in,

you know,

the “joint prosperity” of dozens of nations

is in theory a good thing.

If countries have real economic needs,

and China helps fulfill them,

then China will be doing a great thing.

But there are serious concerns

that that's not how it’s going to turn out.

Let's take Laos for example.

Laos is a poor southeast Asian country

with a GDP of less than 14 billion.

A Chinese joint venture is building

a 6-billion-dollar railway project there.

How can Laos afford such a huge investment,

one that’s projected to lose money

for the first eleven years?

No problem!

Chinese banks will loan them the money!

And if they can’t pay it back...

I guess Laos will just owe the Chinese Communist Party

some favors.

Political favors,

like supporting China in the UN.

Or economic favors,

like signing away their mineral rights to China.

Or the Chinese Communist Party could just

break their kneecaps.

And Laos is just one example

of how China’s skein of geese

might turn out to be more like a kettle of vultures.

A lot of poor countries are concerned

that the Chinese Communist Party

wants to use these infrastructure projects

to make it easier for Chinese companies

to extract their natural resources—

and get rich at the expense of the locals.

I mean, in theory this whole “joint prosperity” slogan

is supposed to mean a win-win for everyone.

At least that’s what the happy,

multi-ethnic children would have you believe.

But a lot of the infrastructure is designed

to exploit oil and minerals,

or move goods—

and not to create housing, schools,

or access to clean drinking water.

And that’s especially an issue

in poor African countries

like Ethiopia and Djibouti.

Corrupt local officials might get rich,

but the general public?

Probably not.

And there’s another problem.

China doesn’t exactly have a great track record

of successful infrastructure projects

to begin with.

This Oxford Review of Economic Policy paper,

analyzes three decades of Chinese investment data.

It says,

“Far from being an engine of economic growth,

a typical infrastructure investment

has destroyed economic value in China

due to poor management of risks.”

So basically,

extensive, long-term data

shows that the majority

of Chinese infrastructure investments

actually lose money.

So ten years from now,

we might see a lot of busted kneecaps.

There are other concerns

that affect wealthier regions, too.

Like the European Union.

According to this article in the Guardian,

the 28 member states of the EU

decided not to support Beijing’s draft statement

about trade issued at the end

of this past weekend’s...BARF summit.

They really have to work on those acronyms.

The problem?

“Members wanted guarantees that projects

would be economically and environmentally sustainable

and subject to fair tendering processes.”

Well, I believe that Chinese leaders

have pledged to treat these projects

like they’re in China’s own backyard,

so I’m sure they’ll be environmentally sustainable.

As for fair tendering processes...

yeah, you’re on your own.

Look, I’m not saying it’s wrong for China

to look out for its own interests.

Of course every country wants to make sure

they get an advantage out of working

or investing in other countries.

But One Belt One Road

is a way that the Communist Party

can exploit poorer countries for China’s

economic and political gain,

all disguised under the idea of

“shared benefits” and “joint prosperity.”

It sounds good on paper,

or in a song,

or a bedtime story,

but it’s not so clear

whether all of these swan geese

are really going to get off the ground.

So what do you think about One Belt, One Road?

Leave your comments below.

Thanks for watching

this episode of China Uncensored.

Once again, I’m your host, Chris Chappell.

See you next time.