This is true.

它的確存在。

It's called Tinder Select. It's only for rich, famous, and extremely beautiful.

它叫作 Tinder Select，只限定富有、知名與外型出眾的用戶使用。

So check, check, and check.

全部條件我都符合。

I...

我...

Oh boy.

天啊。

I made a fake profile, so I can snoop around on there.

我做了一個虛假的個人資料，以便偷偷觀察其他人。

Here it is. Don't tell anyone. That's me.

就是這個，別告訴其他人這是我。

Lucy Burgetta.

Lucy Burgetta。

And I like short walks on the beach and dinners and men.

我喜歡在海灘上散步，也喜歡晚餐與男人。

No one will ever guess it's me.

沒有人能猜到這是我。

Anyway, I was really surprised who was on there.

總之，我對它的某些使用者感到相當驚訝。

Here's Zac Efron's profile.

這是 Zac Efron 的個人簡介。

He writes, "I'm Zac freakin' Efron. What else do you need to know?"

他寫說：「我是超屌的 Zac Efron，你還需要知道什麼嗎？」

And then here's Martha Stewart's profile.

然後這是 Martha Stewart 的介紹。

She writes, "I'm only here for dinner and random hookups.

她寫道：「我在這只為了晚餐與隨機約會。（註：或指一夜情）

I've already had dinner."

而我已經用過晚餐了。」

And here's Nicki Minaj's profile.

這是 Nicki Minaj 的簡介。

She writes, "I'm a shy, conservative girl looking for a man with Christian values.

她寫說：「我是個內向保守的女孩，正在尋找認同基督價值觀 (Christian values) 的男人。

And by Christian, I mean Christian Grey."

而 Christian，我指的是克里斯欽・格雷。（註：格雷的五十道陰影的男主角）」