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  • No one's gonna pull a fast one on me

  • 'cause I'll pull a fast one on you.

  • Uah! *Jumps*

  • AIGHH! (sneeze?? wtf pewds)

  • It's like a sneeze intro. (lmao)

  • Welcome back. I'm playing.. uhh- two episodes

  • in one day. I'm only gonna play for 20 minute

  • because I don't have a lotta time.

  • That doesn't matter to you, the point is that

  • - I'm really into playing this game, and I

  • just wanna play more aaand uh

  • ..do my best to give you guys the best quality content.

  • that's what this channel is ALL ABOUT.

  • I forgot what we were doing..

  • RIGHT than lan- the lantern!

  • Here it is. ...right? The scale.

  • Right?

  • Let's put the fucKING LANTERN

  • AAAH! Shut up.. shut up.

  • I have a crazy idea

  • why don't you just fucking pull it down with the

  • same weight.

  • Just.. like.. I don't know. I-I know, crazy right?

  • AAOOHMYGOD

  • IT'S A GATOR!

  • Shoot it!

  • I gotta ki- I'm sorry Mr. Gator.

  • (Gator voice) No poodz. Pleez. I am not a real gator.

  • Shut the fuck up.

  • I gotta kill you.

  • What happened to you, Gator?

  • Great I'm glad we did that.

  • Why is this room so extremely creepy?

  • Hello?

  • There must be something in here.

  • Hello?

  • What is up with this fucking room?

  • What was - oh. *crash*

  • Shotgun.

  • Bring it.

  • HELLO?

  • I've gotta shotgun! *gasp*

  • I'm not afraid to use-

  • Aww, fuuck nawh

  • Fuck nawh... maah

  • I'm gonna heal.

  • AY I GOT HOLY WATER!

  • ..AND I GOTTA SHOTGUN!

  • AND I'M NOT AF-

  • - OH god it's black- I-I got scared of it.

  • Jesus Christ.

  • And I'm not afraid to use it!

  • Shut the fuck up.

  • Ah it's babies. It's fine.

  • Hey where'd-

  • No. We got nothing.

  • Alright we got a.. BEAUTIFUL painting. (drawing)

  • Alright that's..

  • OHH it's Mr Fuzzball!

  • How you doing there?

  • *Weird child's voice* HI POODIEPIE

  • AAAHHH!

  • OH NO! POODIEPIE!

  • aaAAAAAAaAAAAA

  • Pewdiepie..

  • You will die here to-

  • GOD damn it teddy- no!

  • You will all die in here.

  • Even the audience - of the bros.

  • Well this is fucking weird.

  • Just sit on your chair and shut the fuck uuup.

  • That's my catchphrase.. in this fucking game

  • for some reason.

  • ShufhshsFfsfshhshshfhshh

  • Shut the fuck up.

  • HUA!

  • That's right.

  • No one's gonna pull a fast one on me

  • 'cause I'll pull a fast one on you.

  • UUAH! *jumps*

  • What the fuck was that?

  • Oh my god.

  • *Defeated sigh*

  • Let's not replay that. That was fucking pathetic.

  • (literally replays it anyway)

  • Jesus Chri- stop.

  • Stop.

  • Stop.

  • Stop.

  • Just FUCKING stop.

  • SSTOOOOPPP!

  • Oh no someone is upstairs.

  • Something's wrong with her.

  • No fucking-

  • You fucking bitch.

  • Bring it motherfucker.

  • You best be not j-

  • this is fucking st-

  • the creepiest part so far.

  • I swear to god.

  • There's no looting or anything it's just

  • me fucking walking around.

  • Wait.

  • Where'd I come from?

  • ..Ok.

  • Ok.

  • That can be arranged.

  • Oh look! There's bleach!

  • Let's drink it!

  • Hey bro.

  • Why is the bleach talking to me?

  • It's just a (unintelligible)

  • *very good JackSepticEye voice* Top o' the morning to ya..!

  • This is- FUCK

  • Why do I have to play the scariest part

  • in the fucking- night? - at night.

  • Alright we gotta house.

  • It's just a door.

  • Uhh..

  • So this is a map, isn't it?

  • And that's a d- oh it's a map of this room.

  • So there's something here.

  • Yea I see it.

  • Hey! Look at that.

  • Okay.

  • Woah.

  • What do we got here?

  • (Jacksepticeye) TOOOP O' THE MOR-

  • AAOHMYGOD

  • IT'S JAADAADADAA

  • Let me get your arm buddy.

  • Aah it's fine, don't worry about it.

  • It's fine.

  • Just tear it off.

  • Thanks grandma!

  • You da best!

  • Hey!

  • Look I told you it was moist!

  • Oh god.

  • NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  • UUUAAAAAAAAAAA

  • Bros, heh-he-hu-he-help me.

  • Oh god. It's too quiet.

  • It's too fucking quiet.

  • It's too fucking-

  • It's saving. (gasp in 3)

  • (2)

  • Oh my god. (1)

  • *Gasp*

  • AAAAUAUAAAAAAA

  • 5/7

  • I'M TRYNA HEADSHOT THIS MOTHERFUCKER

  • BUT IT'S SO FUCKING BIG

  • Stop moving your head!

  • This is ridiculous.

  • Thank you.

  • FUCKING moist monsters.

  • I hate 'em.

  • I should've just drank the fucking bleach.

  • *stutters*

  • I just wanna go home.

  • I wanna go home. I wanna go home now.

  • Fuck.

  • Oh my god.

  • Let me reload motherfucker.

  • Fuck this fucking place.

  • Where the hell am I?

  • I wanna go home so fucking bad.

  • I know my aim is fucking terrible,

  • but it stresses me the fuck out.

  • NO GATOR!

  • Fuck I don't fucking see where I'm going.

  • Ugh, thank fucking god.

  • I'm fucking done with this place, man

  • I don't know what to tell you.

  • Here you go.

  • So where do I get the..

  • So I got the arm.

  • How do I use the arm here?

  • I don't fu-

  • Aw for fuck sake.

  • WHAT?

  • GREAT. I don't know who you are but

  • IiUAUAUAiIiU- I would love to.

  • What a fuckin' bitch.

  • Well. This has been great.

  • Alright so we're heading back to the trailer.

  • Because uh, I wanna fucking save.

  • Wha- for fuck sake.

  • God fucking damn it.

  • WWHHUUUAAT?

  • NO

  • NO

  • You're having a threesome without me!??!

  • Oh my god, I love activities!

  • *exhales excitedly*

  • is it?

  • Great-great. Great talking to you Zoella.

  • It's always good fun.

  • It's always-

  • SaaAAaAVe staAAAAAAaaaayy

  • Okay.

  • So, uhh we go through all the family members

  • it seems like.

  • Uuhhh, I suppose we are part of the family too

  • and that's probably why the gift is coming from.

  • I think now we need the crow key

  • so

  • I wanna make sure I have all the shit

  • Where is the fridge?

  • There it is.

  • This fridge wasn't-

  • UUUGGHH

  • COME ON MAN.

  • WHAT THE FuUUUuCK

  • Hey! Look at that. (forgets about head)

  • Uh, the pig is waiting

  • for you in the dissection

  • room, bitch.

  • Thanks buddy!

  • Appreciate it!

  • I'm starting to think I should invest in this one.

  • How much is it, five?

  • 'cuz

  • my reloads are starting to get slow.

  • And we have five coins.

  • Fuck it.

  • Life's handing ya' lemons,

  • so take drugs.

  • ..Don't quote me on that.

  • I'm serious.

  • The dissection room.

  • Where the fuck was that?

  • Fuck all the moist, man. I fucking hate it

  • UUUUUH

  • Hey moose how ya doing?

  • (Moose voice) Hi poodiepie it's good to see ya again

  • Oh hey its good to see ya too man

  • THERE IT IS! NICE!

  • We were looking for ya Mr. Crow

  • CAACAA

  • Yeah good one, good one yeah it works

  • Yeah, it works everytime buddy

  • SUPPLY ROOM MOTHER FUCKA!!!

  • YEEAH!

  • Grenade launcha!

  • Shotgun Shells!

  • All kinds of shit!

  • Hell yeah!

  • Gun powder!

  • What else ya got buddy?

  • Can I break these?

  • BOX!!!

  • Eh, I guess not =(

  • BOX!!

  • No? Okay

  • Alright moose, top of da morning to ya *kisses*

  • I'm heading back

  • I think, uh, I'll do a save here and I'll se ya tomorrow with another episode

  • Although it will be the same episode for you

  • *dies*

  • ALRIGHT! It's a new day!

  • It's a new adventure, let's venture out together

  • Oh boy, its gonna be a "good time"

  • I miss Granny... where's my bitch?

  • My main bitch?

  • I honestly, ha, this is a little embrassing...

  • I don't remember where I'm supposed to go....

  • EEEEEHHHHHH

  • Okay, I'll just pretend that I know....

  • Ehh, how m' I doing so far?

  • In pretending?

  • Out here! Of course!

  • Of, of coourse!

  • The dissection room! Wasn't it?

  • Now where was

  • ...

  • Shut the fuck up!

  • The dissection room?

  • AH!

  • The dissection room!

  • Down in the moist hole, I "remember" (googled)

  • My fa, my favorite place!

  • Whos it going every-

  • Uh god, its darker now, isn't it?

  • Fuck me, man.

  • This aint cool man

  • Dis aint cool at all man...

  • It didnt used to be this dark!

  • I swear to god, man!

  • Fuck man

  • Uggghh

  • I hate moist monsters!

  • They're the fucking worst!

  • Ah god its ah god, Bleach, let me drink you please!

  • No, shut the fuck up.

  • Why are they making so much fucking sound?

  • *gasp* Granneh!! ヽ(°〇°)ﾉ

  • Granny, I almost shot you.

  • GRANNEY

  • What are you doin' here?

  • *granny's voice* Errgh... I'm old

  • Granny, I've got a fucking rocket launcher.

  • And I aint afraid of using it.

  • *Granny* You wouldn't dare to shoot, ya ol' PUSSEH!!

  • ...okay your right granny

  • It's time for you to go home.

  • Get a job

  • Get a job Granny.

  • *Granny* But I'm retire- *Pewds* SHUT THE FUCK UP!

  • Alright here we are

  • Here we go!

  • I wasted a bullet there

  • for no fucking reason absolutely ever

  • *Sarcastically* Great. (jumpscare in 3)

  • Oh that sounds lovely (jumpscare in 2)

  • Is that uhhh Jackspecticeye? (reduce the volume now)

  • AHHHHHHH

  • *higher pitch* EHHHHHHHH (told ya)

  • What the fuck is that!!!

  • AH!...AH!...AH!

  • NO!...NOOO!

  • uh oh..uh

  • Alright we're gonna have to...

  • *Shoots moist monster*

  • ...do that.

  • We're gonna have to do that-but I shot his head?!

  • Is it dead yet!?

  • Is it dead yet??

  • Aw fuck man it was dead

  • I wasted ammo.

  • How's my uh, how's my health?

  • Not great, I've been better.

  • Alright that's fine.

  • Fuck?

  • Fuck.

  • Next time I'll knife

  • This place has a different feel to it ya know?

  • It's not as nice in the dark.

  • I gotta-I gotta say.

  • I don't like it.

  • How's deputy doing?

  • Let's check- Hey look it's deputy!

  • *reading board* "Prove you're a real man.

  • Stick your hand down this pigs throat!"

  • Uh

  • *random sound*

  • Shut the fuck up?

  • Fine I'll do it

  • *Gross squishy sound*

  • Oh my God!

  • Hello!!!

  • Snacky!

  • Hope there's some Nutella down there.

  • I've done that before if you know what I mean.

  • *creepy laugh*

  • Snaaaackkyyyy!

  • I got a snack!

  • *guy comes on over loudspeaker*

  • *pewds* Shut the fuck up.

  • I hate-I hate how they keep fucking flopping!

  • Oh he's still alive..fuck.

  • I don't wanna-

  • I'm just gona run past this guy

  • Hey! Why don't you come in? Take a seat!

  • Take a seat! Aw wait you're crippled

  • I'm sorry I forgot-

  • Oh my God!

  • The famous-the famous flop attack!

  • Alright well you have a good time

  • and think about what you've done, sir.

  • You think about what you've done.

  • Alright, I should probably heal anyway.

  • *sarcastically* Hopefully no more ambushes is waiting for me!!

  • I'm sure it's gonna be safe!

  • YOLO!!!!

  • AUHHHHHHHHHHHH

  • ...

  • AHHHHHHHH

  • ...

  • AHHHHHHHH!

  • GRANNY! GRANNY SAVE ME, GRANNY!

  • GRANNY!

  • *higher pitch* GRANNY!

  • GRANNY?

  • UHH!

  • FUCK!

  • What was that?

  • What WAS that?

  • oh here it is- NO

  • *swedish swearing*

  • NOW IMMA CLOSE THAT DOOR AND YOU BE NICE!!

  • You be nice!

  • AHHHHHH! NO, NO, NO NO, NO

  • Woo!

  • Fuck that place!

  • Fuccck that fucking place man!

  • Why does the game get scarier?

  • I can't handle it.

  • Gahhh!

  • Not a fan.

  • *singing* Save station!

  • Gotta love my save station!

  • Now let's do some shit.

  • Alright let's head on out!

  • I know where the snake room is.

  • I've already been up there a lil bit.

  • It doesn't look-

  • (unintelligible)

  • Great.

  • *incoming moist monstar*

  • No!

  • What the hell is your fucking problem?!

  • AHHH

  • AH-OH MY GOD!

  • What the fuck? Okay, I need to man the fuck up.

  • Alright? I'm getting- I'm being too much of a lil girl.

  • There we go. One shot, one kill

  • Great! Great. Fannntastic.

  • See? I-I- that was pretty cool.

  • Did you feel like I was being really cool there?

  • 'cus I didn't, fuck this.

  • Here's a snake room key.

  • There's 2 snake room doors.

  • So let's start with this one.

  • Maybe 3? I don't fuckin' know.

  • *singing* Snake room! Gator!

  • How you doin' buddeh?

  • * as gator* Hey, it's me, Gator.

  • You wanna kiss?

  • *Laughs*

  • You wanna kiss, señor?

  • *as Pewds* Yes! Yes I would like!

  • *as Gator* Oh my...but I-

  • *Pewds laughing*

  • *Under his breath* Shut the fuck up

  • Great.

  • *laughing*

  • It's broken.

  • *as Gator* Like my heart, señor.

  • *pewds* Okay, sorry Gator.

  • This looks suspicious..

  • *reading note*

  • Great!

  • Surely, there's something in here that we need.

  • What about this trophy?

  • 3rd place? Ha! What a fucking loser!

  • Alright, what else we got?

  • Hey! Shotgun shells in a kids room

  • Look at that, a ball.

  • It's a ball.

  • *random noise*

  • Shut the fuck up Gator.

  • *As Gator* But senor, I did not say anything?

  • *Pewds notices ladder* What?! Was that there before?

  • *Gator* Of course, your observation skills are absolutely terrible señor.

  • *Pewds* ...Alright.

  • I see how it is.

  • Let's go up there.

  • I just gotta make sure I got all the shit I need.

  • There we go, see?

  • See what I'm talking about?

  • *As Gator* Si, senor. Good luck senor.

  • I love you.

  • *Pewds* I love you too Gator, I love you too baby.

  • One day we'll run away together.

  • How do I get up there?

  • Ah, fuck.

  • There's a bobblehead right there.

  • *Laughs*

  • Alright, fuck it, let's just check the other rooms while we still can.

  • Where's the other snake room?

  • I swear there's a snake- there it is.

  • I swear there's a snake room.

  • If you think about it, isn't there a snake room in all of us?

  • I know, I have deep thoughts.

  • So do you.

  • Is it weird when I talk to you and you don't reply but you think a reply in your head?

  • That's right. I know what you're doing mother fun-granny!

  • *As Granny* Hi-Hey! You made it out of that hole!

  • *Pewds* Granny?

  • Ya look good.

  • Ya look damn good.

  • Lemme just-ooh nice.

  • Smoking them herbs are we Granny? Hehehe

  • *As Granny* yeah, I'm in that dank shit.

  • *pewds* Alright Granny!

  • Don't mind if I do, Don't mind if I help myself out yknow.

  • Ahh, nod twice if you don't mind me takin' your weed

No one's gonna pull a fast one on me

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