and uh

it is dark.

Why didn't you go after me?

I thought you were a nice guy.

You seemed really upset

and I wanted to give you some space

and I was probably going to go find you after another minute,

and uh-

I don't want to be a "nice guy" anymore.

The truth is, Derek, I don't want you to change.

I like you just the way you are

emphasis on "I like you"

What about everything else you said tonight?

Maybe I'm just afraid.

My last relationship was crap and

I'm afraid that if we date and it doesn't work out

then not only will we lose our friendship, but we'll hate each other, too.

I'd never want that.

Audrey

I'd never hate you

I'd only hate it if

you never gave

"us" a chance.

Then let's go for it.

F**K

ARE YOU SERIOUS??

"Nice guys finish last"

As a naive high schooler, I didn't want to believe it.

As a hopeful college student, I wanted to disprove it.

But here I was,

the morning after getting rejected by my dream girl and best friend, Audrey.

And all the evidence was right there in front of me;

despite avoiding the friendzone

and being upfront about my feelings

I was still turned down.

There was no hope for nice,

never has-

Are you in the middle of one of your internal monologues?

yes

thanks for interrupting.

Please finish.

never will.

what do you want?

I'm guessing last night didn't go well?

Well, let's just say that Audrey

chose walking a mile alone at night versus spending another five minutes with me.

What happened?

I messed up.

I thought she had feelings

but she didn't see me that way.

Sorry.

And then?

And then I-

went and told her it wasn't worth being friends if we weren't going to be anything more.

Holy crap! Dude, why would you say that???

What?

You're supposed to be on my side.

You're always talking about how you're the nice girl

who also gets overlooked.

Don't compare me to you.

Nice girls have our own unique set of problems,

the difference is you guys feel entitled to something because of your niceness,

us girls don't get that same privilege.

I don't feel entitled, I-

I just feel-

used.

or you're just feeling unwanted and you're taking it out on her.

STOP.

Arghhhh! You're making me think things

I need someone to blindly validate my feelings.

I knew it, man.

I

knew it.

And you know what pisses me off the most?

She's probably going to start dating some douchebag

with a douchy shirt and a douchy jacket that matches his douchy haircut.

What makes you say that?

I don't know.

It's a completely baseless accusation,

but I know that's what's going to happen

See, that's the problem with guys like you, Derek.

You get rejected and your world comes crashing down

but you never look at yourself

and instead blame everyone else.

What if this guy that she's dating is an amazing person?

and just because it isn't you, he is the douchebag

and SHE'S a b*tch

What is with you and Julia today?

I'm just trying to say that

I've been that other guy before.

I know for a fact that when I dated this girl

the guy before that she rejected thought I was a douchebag.

But I'm not!

I'm awesome.

Why do you think you're friends with me?

And let's be real, he just wasn't right for her,

and a little lame.

But Lawrence,

you are a douchebag.

ohhh I'm a-

Hey, you called me lame. Okay?

and you can't deny girls like guys

with more of an edge.

Look, I'm not going to sit here and tell you to be something that you aren't.

Then what are we doing?

We're playing cards.

Bear with me now,

let's say...we're playing poker.

And you get dealt

a seven deuce.

You're trying to be make it straight with Audrey but

you just can't with these cards

I'd like to think

Audrey dealt a seven too

and I'm trying to build a full house

even if she did

the odds of you guys making a two seven full house

VERY unlikely

oh cool

so you're saying I never had a shot with her

thanks a lot Lawrence that was REALLY helpful

nonono

what you forgot to see is that

you have two clubs

so instead of going for a straight or a fullhouse

why not try a flush?

you gotta rethink your strategy

or

cut your losses

fold

and start a new hand

or bluff

I'm lost

she said it'd be messed up if I decided not to be friends with her anymore

BUT

she KNOWS that I'm nice

and that I wouldn't be that petty

and you want to prove to her that you

are

I think she believes that I would never truly remove myself from her

so

I'm going to show her what it's like to really be gone

not a friend

not a nice guy

and she might be pissed off at first

BUT

ultimately she'll realize how important I was

and in that absence of THAT guy

she'll realize that she actually DID like me

that's REALLY risky

you're going against the house

I'm going all in

I'm going to stop this analogy

is it too much?

just a little bit

sorry

song: stampede by year of the ox

hey Derek !

oh hey Abe !

Where were you Saturday?

for Audrey's potluck for the game?

oh we don't really hang out anymore

um she was sorta leading me on

what?! really?

don't tell her I said that though

and um be careful around her

Derek

how many outfits should we bring for our graduation photoshoot?

oh uh about that ...

um I can't anymore...

what?!

that's so last minute !

Audrey and all of us had made plans !

I just...can't

um

that day uh my camera is

broken

so sorry

hey !!

hi

Sandra right?

Audrey's cousin

yea we met last quarter

right..

I think she gave you my ladder

could I get that back?

oh yea sure

hey Derek ?

yea

do you

happen to know anyone with an ID that I can borrow?

what for?

some of my friends are going to a party this weekend

and we just need to get in

Audrey obviously isn't helping

is he still not responding?

no! and he doesn't even open my snaps anymore

what?!

hey guys!

finally!! where you been?

I dropped my phone two days ago

it was this whole thing..

why are you dressed like a fckboi?

yeaaa

you look like me you biter!

I'm just

dressing

fashionably

wait

is this part of your bet against Audrey?

no

yes

ack

I don't know

it wasn't at first but

but now that I've unfollowed her

unfriend her

and told all her friends I'm not taking their graduation photos anymore

hold up

you petty

whatever

ok it felt good to be selfish for once

to not care what other people think

so yes I bought a long a$$ t-shirt

well should we go in?

in a sec I told Sandra I'd wait for her outside

wait wait wait

Sandra?

Audrey's little cousin Sandra?

yea she needs an ID from me

did you ask Audrey?

why?

that's what a NICE guy would do

hey Derek!

hey Sandra!

good to see ya

this is Lawerence and Julia

hi

you guys wanna go in?

you know

we'll let you guys go first and get kicked out and then we'll go in

we'll see you guys in there

wait are we?

no don't worry

what is this? bring your daughter to work day?

this is bad

song: double dip by far east movement

oh my gosh !! my heart is beating so fast

I can't believe that actually worked!!

I TOLD you the bouncers wouldn't be able to tell

all Asians look the same

hey thanks again for helping

I've asked Audrey SO many times

I mean she's a great cousin and all but

just super overprotective you know?

I know what you mean

I was always telling her to include you

aww really ??

thhaannkss

you know I just want to have a good time tonight

you wan-

TURN UP

THIS GON BE LIT

SANDRA

song: sxwme by far east movement

wow they are pounding drinks

well you know what they say

nice guys finish drunk

what about nice girls?

what about nice girls?

hey we have struggles too

you know I've kinda always thought of it as girls doing all the rejecting

girls get friend zoned too ya know

we get overlooked

we struggle revealing our feelings

and we get rejected

all the time

you don't see us whining and lashing out

well if you need help on how to do that

Derek

number one whiner

SO GOOD

DEREK DEREK DEREK

so.. what are you going to do after graduation?

it's like a week away right?

um not sure yet

I think I'm going to go home for a little bit

and then I guess we'll see from there