Aw, that's a cute photo of us.

「噢，我們這張合照真可愛。」

Let me tag you.

「讓我標註你。」

-But what she got... -Oh, I'm not on Facebook. -was the perfect nightmare.

但她遇到的⋯⋯ 「噢，我沒有在用 Facebook。」

What?

「什麼？」

Yeah, no, I'm not on any social media.

「對啊，我沒有在用任何社群軟體。」

What the...

「什麼鬼⋯⋯」

-Uh, this can't be happening. -Oh, I'm not on Facebook. -I can't find him anywhere. -Yeah, no, i'm not on any social media.

「喔！這不可能發生的，我哪裡都找不到他。」

How am I supposed to find the pages of his ex?

「我要如何找到他前女友的個人頁面？」

So, Snapchat, WhatsApp, Facebook - he's not on anything?

「所以 Snapchat、WhatsApp、Facebook ⋯⋯他全都沒在用嗎？」

What, I don't, what, how does he send you a dick pic?

「什麼，我不⋯⋯那他要怎麼傳他老二的照片給你看？」

He doesn't.

「他不傳的。」

I've only ever seen his dick... in person.

「我只有⋯⋯親眼看過他的老二。」

Oh my God!

「我的天啊！」

I don't know what to do.

「我不知道該怎麼辦。」

But I took a great picture of my boobs earlier, and I had no one to send it to.

「不久前我才拍了很棒的奶照，但我沒人可以傳。」

It's gonna be okay.

「會沒事的。」

Is it? Is it?

「會嗎？」

They don't know what he did last summer, because it's not on Facebook.

他們不知道他去年暑假做了什麼，因為沒有在 Facebook 上。

He is untraceable.

「無法追蹤他。」

He's completely off the grid.

「他徹底抹滅了蹤跡。」

A ghost if you will.

「甚至可以說他是個鬼魂。」

He's not on Insta, LinkedIn, or Pinterest.

「他沒有在 Instagram、LinkedIn、或是 Pinterest 上。」

And if you think he's on Snapmap, you're crazy.

「如果你認為他有用 Snapmap ，你一定是瘋了。」

I mean, the man has no digital footprint.

「我的意思是，這個男的沒有任何數位足跡。」

He's never even had on Myspace.

「他甚至沒有用過 Myspace。」

Who is he?

「他到底是誰？」

-I don't know. -Oh, I'm not on Facebook. Yeah, no, I'm not on any social media.

「我不知道。」

You know, when you have like an opinion on something, how do you voice it?

「你知道，當你對某件事情有意見的時候，你要怎麼發表？」

Well I suppose, I just tell it to the nearest person.

「我想，我會告訴當下離我最近的人。」

What is this?

「這是什麼？」

I think it's an actual photo album.

「我想這是一本實體相簿。」

Where is the comment section?

「留言欄在哪裡？」

How does he know if people like them?

「他要怎麼知道別人喜不喜歡這些照片？」

Oh my God, none of the photos have filters on them.

「我的天，這些照片全都沒有加濾鏡。」

Get out of there, Sarah.

「離開那裡， Sarah。」

Get out of there now!

「現在就離開！」

(inaudible) Sarah, clearly, he is cat-fishing you.

「Sarah ，他一定是用假身份在釣你。」

No.

「不。」

In reverse.

「用相反的方式。 (註：一般的 catfish 指的是網路上的假身份比本人更有吸引力)」

Christ, Sarah, do you even know what he had for lunch today?

「天啊， Sarah ，你甚至不知道他今天午餐吃什麼吧？」

No, never gonna know.

「不，永遠都不會知道。」

Unless I ask him.

「除非我問他。」

Think about it, if you can't tag him, does he even exist?

「想想看，如果你不能標註他⋯⋯那他真的存在嗎？」

Hi, guys.

「嗨，大家。」

Okay, yeah, he exists.

「OK ，對，他真實存在。」

Yeah, yeah, he's there.

「對啊，他就在那裡。」

Anti Social.

反社會。

Coming soon to Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, Pinterest, Vimeo, YouTube, Myspace, Bebo, Linkedin, Foursqaure, Flickr, Periscope, Whatsapp, Tumblr, Viber, Reddit, Live.ly, and even Google Plus

即將在 Facebook、Twitter、Instagram、Snapchat、Pinterest、Vimeo、YouTube、Myspace、Bebo、Linkedin、Foursqaure、Flickr、Periscope、WhatsApp、Tumblr、Viber、Reddit、Live.ly 以及 Google Plus 上映。