I'm home. You're all my bitches now!

Okay.

Meg! You look so different.

How was prison?

First question: Who's the biggest, toughest guy in this house.

Well I don't like to toot my own horn, but I believe I hold the distinction of--

My house now, bitch!

Now who's the funniest?

I know my way around a joke--

For God's sake, Dad, have some humility, it'll save your life!

There better be beer in the fridge.

Hey.

Meg! What the hell are you doing in here?

Shower time.

Yeah, for me! N-not for--

What are you doing with that loofa?

Don't worry about it.

(Offscreen, Peter screams)

You told me not to worry about it!

I SHOULD'VE BEEN WORRIED THE WHOLE TIME!!!

Meg, honey, I did all your laundry.

Oh my God, what is that smell?

It's my poop-bucket.

What the hell?!?!

I'm use to going to the bathroom in my room.

That's disgusting! No, you use the toilet here like everyone else.

No.

Ah! God, it smells horrible.

Well, can you at least empty it each time you use it?

I like to fill it up. I'm not making a million trips.

Oh my God, are you using my shirts as toilet paper?

Yeah. And I think I might need some right now.

Get out now or stay and get weird.

Your call, warden.

Hey, who's the new dude?

Oh my God, that's Meg Griffin! She just got outta prison.

Hey Meg, what did they put you in jail for? Being ugly?

[the other kids laugh]

Hey Meg, what happened? Did you get out early for "fat behaviour"

[the twats laugh again]

Nice tattoo! Did you get your butt hair braided too while you're in there?

[the asswipes laugh again]

What'd you do? Carve a gun outta soap and then not wash with it? Ha ha, P.U.!

[take a wild guess what they do]

Hey Meg. Are you gonna take those soda cans to the shaw-skank redemption center?

- [they laugh] (okay, THAT ONE was a fucking stretch!)

Look at Meg, they took an innocent little girl

And turned her into a psychotic sociopathetic freak!

[the family gasps]

Whadja say, Brian?

Oh, I... I was just picking up on something Lois said.

What is it, what did... what is it... what did you say Lois? Something about Meg being a freak?

Oh no! I didn't say anything.

Uh, Peter said something about Meg which I completely disagree with.

[Peter stammers] That wasn't me. Stewie was really laying into Meg about something.

- Yeah it was Stewie. - Definitely Stewie.

Oh so NOW everyone understands me!

Look, Meg, we're just worried about you.

Well don't. I can take care of myself.

I'll be outta here by the end of the week.

Punch yourself in the face.

[Stewie stutters in fear]

PUNCH YOURSELF IN THE FACE!!1!

[Stewie stammers in fear]

Alright, he doesn't know what he's doing

You, fatso, punch a baby in the fa--

- I did good, Meg? - Shut up.

I did good!

I did good.