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  • Pikachu Doidão

  • I'm about to head to the Philippines, uh in a couple of days

  • So I'm like really, we're like rushing to get this video done

  • I apologise if there's been like a little delay

  • I'll try and post this out there when I'm in the Philippines

  • but I have no idea when I'm gonna have time to do that based on our schedule out there

  • I'm in the Philippines, I'm going to the Philippines

  • ...or I just came back from the Philippines. So,

  • Mabuhay, Mabubye!

  • okay...what am I doing?

  • Welcome back to another Dear Ryan!

  • That's not how I start these!

  • I need a Dear Ryan theme song, somebody make me a Dear Ryan theme song

  • I should make my own Dear Ryan theme song.

  • It's Dear Ryan

  • eh-eh

  • That sounded like a Michael Jackson song.

  • *BURP*

  • So for those of you that haven't watched my draw my life

  • And for those of you that don't know

  • Since I was 5 years old I did Judo my whole life.

  • Growing up when I did Judo, everybody's like, why?

  • Why couldn't you take Karate, or like Taekwondo

  • Judo was never a popular sport.

  • Only up until recently since the rise of like Ronda Rousey

  • Judo has even been considered like a legit sport, I feel like.

  • Sean and I are actually both black belts in Judo

  • Crazy right? Doesn't mean we're any good at it.

  • But we both have our black belts.

  • We may have coloured our white belts with Sharpies, black belts nonetheless.

  • Call Sean Fujiyoshi.

  • Yo, I'm doing a Dear Ryan right now, can I, umm...

  • Can I throw you?

  • Like, Judo throws?

  • *giggles*

  • Alright! *laughs*

  • Alright, here we go, I guess.

  • Of course for the really advanced,

  • And last but not least...

  • See?

  • If you got Judo techniques like this you ain't gonna be afraid of anyone.

  • Not even Ronda Rousey.

  • That's right, Ronda.

  • I'm callin' you out publicly.

  • I'll take you out anytime, anyplace, anywhere you want to--

  • What did you say?

  • --go to...dinner.

  • I-I'll take you out to dinner anytime anyplace anywhere

  • My treat!

  • That's what I thought.

  • Maybe even go to a bar.

  • After, I actually own a bar

  • I'd love to have you in it, it's called the arm bar.

  • I break your arm.

  • OH YOU'RE DEAD

  • [gasp] Quick! YamahaMotor-Gatame!

  • Get it? It's a human, p & o.

  • Human piano.

  • People are always asking me about

  • I feel like I've explained it before

  • But I looked through my videos and I don't think I actually have...

  • ...so I'm gonna do this one.

  • This scar, look how big this scar is right here.

  • And a scar right here actually.

  • I was getting attacked by ninjas one day and...

  • *sigh* I'm not even gonna bother.

  • This is a true story.

  • It's not a story I'm necessarily proud of.

  • When I was 6 years old, I was in the first grade I remember...

  • I was riding my bike with a bunch of my neighbourhood friends...

  • ...you know at the time there was this stunt, dare-devil guy

  • called Evil Kanival

  • If you guys don't who he is

  • He did a bunch of crazy stunts on his motorcycle

  • And basically I wanted to be him. I thought that was like the coolest thing in the world.

  • There was a few of my neighbourhood friends and we were all riding our bikes

  • On my street, there's this gigantic ditch.

  • I would say, about a 6 foot, 6 and a half foot drop.

  • And out of nowhere...

  • I rode my bike, straight towards the ditch

  • Tried to lift up the handle bars, tried to do a backflip and land

  • But it did not quite go that way.

  • So instead I did [chuckles]

  • ...kind of like a half backflip then halfway through towards the end I was like...

  • OH MY GOD

  • I'M GONNA FALL

  • But instead of bailing, I turned sideways

  • And basically I landed exactly on this arm, and completely broke my arm.

  • I got it casted, and apparently I don't know, something went wrong with the casting

  • So by the time I was in high school, I kept having these wrist issues.

  • Like everytime I just bent it a little, it started to hurt.

  • When they got it x-rayed they realised

  • that, you know from that first injury

  • My arm got messed up.

  • What they had to do because this bone was longer

  • What they had to do was they had to CUT

  • All the way through the bone and take out a chunk of bone

  • To make this bone shorter.

  • That's why there's big slices there.

  • And then what they did is they went in and they attached a metal rod to the two bones

  • So that the bones would heal properly.

  • And then they put another metal rod in here.

  • You know, I had metal in my arm for like, 2 years

  • There's some metal actually still in there.

  • I was actually really self-conscious about this

  • I used to always like wanna wear long sleeve shirts

  • There's nothing you can do about it. It couldn't, it could be worse

  • You could have a scar on your FRIKIN NOSE

  • wait...

  • You want me to go to hell FIRST and then kill myself?

  • That doesn't make any sense! How do you even do that?

  • 'cause if you're in hell you're already dead. Can you even kill yourself in hell?

  • There's no way you can go to hell if you're still alive. That doesn't make ANY sense...

  • unless...

  • [gasp]

  • OH MY GOD THIS IS HELL

  • Seriously though.

  • uhm......

  • I don't know how to do that. [chuckles]

  • My rapping is basically 5th grader poetry.

  • I just look for words that rhyme as fast as I can

  • And then I just, even if doesn't make sense I'll just say it. [chuckles]

  • That's how I freestyle

  • ...but I'm just gonna go for it.

  • [AHEM]

  • Yo, I'm sitting right here, doing this Dear Ryan

  • Call me MGM, 'cause Imma straight lyin'. To you.

  • When I say that I'm making this up.

  • I got all the lyrics written out on the back of this cup.

  • I'm just kidding there's nothing really on there.

  • In fact, I already did this Dear Ryan

  • I don't even know why it's still here.

  • I'll tell you why, because I'm lazy.

  • I'm a bit crazy.

  • When I open my eyes big you got sunflowers I got daisies!

  • That made no sense.

  • Because I need to buy time now...dot dot dot...

  • OK

  • Okay, now I know how this rap's gonna end.

  • I'm just gonna keep rhyming words that end with "n"

  • Like abbreviation, and condensation

  • On a scale from one to ten, IGN

  • Raised a ten out of ten

  • And for all of y'all who don't think I'm really rapping

  • For all of y'all that don't think I'm really freestyling

  • You're right. I'm not.

  • I've got all the lyrics on the back of this cup

  • *laughs* Oh my god that was so bad

  • Okay I was, I was, I was freestyling

  • But the- I-I I'm not good

  • I'm sorry, I'm sorry guys

  • To all the real rappers out there

  • That was such an insult, I'm sorry guys

  • *sigh* You guys have no idea how difficult it is to work with Marley

  • Cool.

  • That doesn't even sound like dubstep

  • Dubstep sounds more like...

Pikachu Doidão

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